Hobi: GOOD MORNING Y'ALL! HOW'S EVERYBODY DOING?
Namjoon: it's 7PM, and why are you yelling?
Hobi: ME? YELLING? I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, MY VOCAL TONE IS NORMAL! IS THAT A HOT POCKET?
Jin: no, that's my dirty napkin- OH MY GOD HOBI DON'T EAT IT!!
Yoongi: Come on, spit it out!
Hobi: WOW, THIS HOT POCKET IS TERRIBLE. CAN I HAVE ANOTHER ONE?
Jimin: what happened to him?! Why is he like this?
Jungkook: maybe he's having a seizure
Tae: yeah, or maybe he's shocked because he finally realized that the moon landing was fake-
Namjoon: Tae, enough with these conspiracy theories-
Tae: -why did the flag fly in the wind, Namjoon? They were on the freaking MOON!-
Yoongi: wait, I think I know what happened... Hobi, how much sprite did you drink today?
Hobi: YES
Yoongi: Oh shit.
Hobi: GUYS, YOU KNOW WHAT WE SHOULD DO? WE SHOULD GO SKINNY DIPPING IN THE LAKE!
Jin: what lake?
Namjoon: Hobi, I don't think it's a good idea. Let's just breathe for a minute, relax, and thi- aand he's naked.
Jungkook: ahhhhh dude!
Jin: God, I don't know where to look-
Jimin: I mean, we've all seen it before-
Yoongi: Um, EXCUSE me?
Tae: Yaaaaaaaaas queen! Let's DO THIS!-
Namjoon: TAE!! Put your pants on, now!
Tae: Ohhh, but-
Namjoon: NOW!
Tae: uggh, FINE!! You guys are no fun.
Jimin: Um, guys, I hate to interrupt, but Hobi is on his way to the porch.
Namjoon: GET HIM!
*The group run after Hobi and manage to catch him right before he goes out to the porch.*
Hobi: LET GO!! I'M A BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLY WHO SHALL NOT BE TAMED-
Namjoon: Jungkook, hold him!
Jungkook: I'm trying, but he won't stop licking me!
Jimin: yeah, he's licking me too-
Tae: and you like it, huh?
Jungkook: NO!
Jimin: well, a little bit
Jungkook: wait, what?
Namjoon: Guys, focus!! We need to figure out a way to stop him before he - Hobi, NO! No licking Namjoon! Bad Hobi!
Hobi: GRRRRRRR
Jin: What can we do to calm him down? This guy is energetic even when he's not crazy from drinking sprite.
Yoongi: drinking... That's it! Wait here.
*Yoongi runs to his room and comes back carrying a bottle of whiskey.*
Jungkook: wait, you keep a bottle of whiskey in your room?
Yoongi: Yes, now shut up and hold him. Hobi, open your mouth.
Hobi: AHHHHHHHH, NO, DON'T HURT ME, YOU EVIL DENTIST! AHHHH!!!
Yoongi: Perfect, drink this. Good. Keep drinking.
Hobi: THAT'S DISGUSTING. WHERE'S MY HOT POCKET?
Jimin: he's still crazy, why is it not working?
Yoongi: give it a minute.
Hobi: UGH, I COULD KILL FOR A BOWL OF CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP-
Tae: -Umm, are you sure that it's working?
Hobi: WITH A SODA ON THE SIDE-
Yoongi: Hm, that's weird, it usually works faster-
Hobi: Life is meaningless and we're all going to die.
Yoongi: There we go!
************************************
Stream Chicken noodle soup, guys! Congratulations for this solo project, Hobi, you're amazing 💜
