All I Wanted Was You (Part 2)

No Matter What...

Sam POV

It had been a few weeks since we got Jae back from hell, she'd gotten a little more talkative and smiled a little more, but not by much, she was still on edge and she hardly slept, but she ate like there was no tomorrow.

I sat at the table in the kitchen with her, Dean, Cas, and Jack as she shoved a fork full of pancakes in her mouth, cutting another mouthful and putting it in her mouth as she chewed. She ate fast, quicker than most people would have thought was healthy unless they knew Dean.

Dean stared at her as she ate more than she'd ever been able to before.

"Jesus Christ, Jae... What are you, getting ready for hibernation?" Dean asked.

She shot him an annoyed look and put another fork full in her mouth as she chewed and put her fork down after swallowing, done with her breakfast before any of us were.

"I need to sign you up for a hot dog eating contest, you'd blow all those fat single guys living in their mother's basements out of the water." Dean chuckled.

"Dean, I'll blow you out of the water if you so much as comment another time on how I eat." She said as she looked at him.

Dean raised his hands in surrender, "Okay, okay, I'm sorry." He chuckled softly.

Jae shot a raised eyebrow at him and let out a small smile, one of the few she ever showed.

"So, I've got us a case if you two are up for it... What do you say, you ready to get out and bag some evil sons of bitches again, Jae." Dean asked her through a raised eyebrow, a smirk on his lips.

She let out a long breathe, thinking.

"I'd probably just slow you down... I'm rusty." She said.

Dean didn't catch her attempt to obviously tell them to leave without her.

He waved a hand, "you? Come on, no amount of days off could make you rusty, you're one of the best." He said.

"No, I don't think I should." She said.

"Please?... I've missed going on hunts with you." Jack said.

Jae looked at him and shook her head.

"I just don't think it's a good idea." She said.

"Going on another hunt would refresh you if nothing else." Cas said.

Jae looked at them, feeling pressured and uncomfortable as she stumbled over her words.

"I-I... Uh." She stopped, looking down at her hands like she had done so many times since we got her back, she was shy and almost afraid to speak her mind, she never had a problem with that before.

"I don't think she should go just yet." I said to the others, saving her from explaining.

"Sam, come on." Dean whined.

"Dean, you three just go and Jae and I will stay here and watch BJ." I said.

Dean looked from me to Jae who took my hand under the table as a silent thanks for my jumping in to save her, and then Dean seemed to understand.

"Okay... But when you feel up to it, we'd love to have you." Dean said.

She nodded, "Okay." She said.

The three of them left and Jae and I went out to get groceries with BJ.

I held her hand the whole time, BJ switching between us as he sat in our arms, playing with a toy car we brought him.

When we got home and it was time to put BJ down for his nap, I looked over at Jae after we put him down to bed.

She looked exhausted. She hadn't had more than an hours sleep each night and it was getting to her.

I took her hand gently.

"Honey, come here." I said gently.

She walked with me to the library and I sat down in an armchair by the bookshelves on one wall, pulling her to sit on my lap.

She did, putting an arm around my neck as she leaned her head against my shoulder, she felt so small in my arms, and it wasn't just her figure, it was her spirit, it was broken and I could feel it, she wasn't the same girl who went to the pit for my brother, they'd broken her and that brought tears to my eyes.

I looked down at her as she looked up to me from my shoulder.

"Why are you crying?" She asked.

I looked at her, shaking my head softly.

"I just don't want you do feel like this anymore... Feel so broken." I whispered softly.

She looked surprised that I could tell.

I nodded, "You're my wife, I can feel that they broke you." I said.

She nodded softly, a few tears coming to her eyes too.

"I'm sorry..." She breathed.

I shook my head, "It wasn't four fault." I said softly back, kissing her on the temple tenderly.

"I'll fix you, baby. Whatever it takes I will." I said softly.

She nodded and I kissed her on the top of the head as she leaned her head against me again, a few tears slipping from her eyes.

"I'll stay awake while you get some rest." I said softly.

She nodded and closed her eyes, letting out a deep breathe as she began to fall asleep.

Jae POV

I felt the blistering heat on my skin that made me sweat, my own sweat running into the cuts all over my body, stinging painfully. The pain in my fingers made them twitch as the pain came in quick waves of agony. Screaming echoed from all around me as I huddled in the dark, hardly able to breathe, the pain inside my mouth aching as I swallowed and the pinch of the spikes digging into the top and bottom of my mouth spiking the pain again, the constant taste of rusty iron and my own blood in my mouth making me want to gag. The heavy weight on my wrists and ankles was pulling my arms down painfully hard.

Light beamed into the darkness around me and I flinched, with the light came a new wave of heat, I closed my eyes as the light made my eyes sting because I was so used to the dark around me I'd been in for hours.

"Open your eyes." A gruff voice said.

I squinted, looking up as they said it. I knew that voice, I'd been acquainted with it for years now, and I loathed it more than anything. I flinched as they grabbed the iron cage on my head and wrenched me forward out of the box, making the mouthpiece scratch deeper into the top and bottom of my mouth.

I jumped, opening my eyes as I looked around, I was back in the bunker, the pain in my fingers, mouth, and skin was gone and there wasn't the unbearable heat around me or the constant screaming of tortured souls.

I was wrapped in Sam's arms, he looked at me calmingly.

"You're safe, it was just a dream." He said soothingly.

I nodded, looking deep in his eyes and seeing that he was telling the truth, his eyes were my Sam's eyes.

I stood up off his lap and he stood too, wrapping his arms around me as I let out a deep breathe, the sheer terror of that place was still making my heart race in my chest, but in his as I felt at least some relief.