ATEEZ 9th Member AU

Something More

When San first realized he was in loved with Nari

If someone were to ask San when he first realized he had feelings for Nari, he wouldn't be sure what to tell them. If someone were to ask when he first realized he was in love with Nari, that'd be even harder for him to answer than the first question. His attraction for her he could reasonably say probably started when she had first walked into their practice room.

She wasn't wearing makeup, her hair was tied up in a messy bun. She wasn't dressed up all fancy. Just some plain black joggers, a pink tank top and a pink cropped hoodie over that. Her black sneakers were worn out and in no way new or designer. But it was probably in that moment.

Her bright smile that showed two lines of perfectly straight teeth. So white that it was a very real possibility someone might need sunglasses to stare at her when she smiled. Or the way that all of them were nervous—her included—yet she was still bubbly and welcomed them all with a hug.

Maybe it grew from attraction to a crush as the weeks went on. How she just fit so effortlessly into their lives. From the way she wasn't afraid to tease any of them—the older members included—to the way that she already seemed fiercely protective over them. How she just seemed to know when she needed to pull back on her antics and give someone their space.

Maybe the others didn't notice, but San did. How when they would go out to eat or the late night meals at the dorm or in the practice room. She always made sure everyone had something in front of them or on their plate before she would eat. It was subtle and no one ever said anything if they did notice. San did. He saw everything in those moments.

Or the way she would sneak into the laundry room at night and rewash some of Wooyoung or Yeosang's clothes because she knew they didn't do it properly. Or how she would accompany Jongho to vocal lessons or just sit quietly with him while he practiced. Or how animated she became when playing video games with Yunho or Hongjoong.

Maybe even how she seemed to be the only one that could get Hongjoong to take a breath and live a little. Or how she would make sure the boys cleaned up after themselves so Seonghwa wouldn't have to spend his entire day cleaning when he chose to do that.

San might say that it grew from a crush to more serious the first time she had been vulnerable with them. It wasn't her choice nor did she want it to happen, but it did. The nightmares had picked up and when asked, she had broken down and cried to them.

Telling them all her whole life story—from beginning until present. San's heart broke for her then but soared at the same time. Soared because he could see that she trusted them enough with all the details of her life—good or bad. Soared because even after all of the emotions and crying and explanations, she was able to tease them and go back to her bubbly self while still leaning to them for support.

Or maybe it was how determined she was to heal when she had broken her knee. How upset she was, how frustrated at herself she was. How hard she worked once she was cleared to come back better and stronger than before—even if she pushed a little too far at times.

San could say he realized how serious his feelings were the first time he felt jealousy when Ravn was pining after her. How he wanted her to look at him like that and only him. How he wanted to be the one that was making her laugh and giggly like he was.

Then his dream became a reality and while it wasn't ideal and a complete surprise, Nari had kissed him. They were then together.

She put up with his jealousy issues. She put up with his insecurities and still tried to be there as best as she could. Not letting their relationship affect the others or change anything about them. They were simply boyfriend and girlfriend.

How hurt he was—and her—when everything came crashing down. How she still tried to make things be as normal as possible. How San had tried to as well while both of them still were throwing heart eyes at each other. Then, they were together again.

This time has been different. Is different. San feels as if they could climb the highest mountain in the world and get there in record time as long as it was the two of them. He still had butterflies every time she stared for too long or whispered she loved him.

Still felt his stomach flip when she would throw her head back in carefree laughter or smile in his direction.

San wouldn't be able to pinpoint the exact moment when he fell in love with Nari. It just happened, natural as ever.

But to San, a combination of all the little things they have gone through together and as a group all added to the love he held in his heart for her.

His Kim Nari.