ATEEZ 9th Member AU

Alone

Nari is still struggling with their loss and distancing herself

When Nari had woken up the next day after drinking, she had a pounding headache, but she knew she needed to apologize. She ran out of her bunk, trying not to hurl. She went straight to Yeosang and jumped in his bed, not caring if she woke him up. She apologized profusely, kissing his cheeks and laying all over him until he had no choice but to forgive her. However, she still didn't tell him what was wrong when he asked her and easily changed the subject.

It had been a few weeks since then and everyone had noticed how much quieter Nari had become. She was still smiling and interacting with them, but only if they initiated it first. When they were at the dorm, most of the time was spent in her room. Nari was big on skin ship with anyone and everyone and there had been little affection from her to anyone since that night. It was extremely frustrating for all of them that anytime they would ask what was wrong she would easily avoid the question without them noticing. They were all worried and she was really good at hiding it from them.

They were currently waiting to start an interview. It was their millionth one it seemed like since coming overseas. Nari was dressed amazingly, her outfit hugging her curves just right. Her black hair pin straight and hanging loosely around her shoulders. Her lips with a pink tint and minimal makeup. Her brown eyes shined, but the boys noticed how there wasn't as much light as there usually was. Hongjoong sat next to her and she gave him a slight smile, not keeping eye contact for a long time. He frowned a little; it was really bothering him that one of his members is struggling and he can't help. "How are you feeling?" He asked. "Fine, oppa. Just tired."

Hongjoong sighed but forced a smile on his face. That had been her signature answer for weeks now. He didn't want to argue with her as they had been getting in petty arguments the past week for him trying to force out what was wrong and her not budging. He kissed her temple and walked towards the other members that Nari was very obviously keeping her distance from. Nari sighed, closing her eyes and just wishing she was back at the hotel in bed. She still had the same thoughts from that night and couldn't stop blaming herself for being the reason they didn't win and would probably never win.

She knew they cared, and she felt bad for not being able to appreciate it but she couldn't even appreciate herself at the moment. She couldn't help but think (very irrationally) that if she shared the same fate as her parents, she never would have joined ATEEZ and they would have won the award they so undeniably deserved. She was usually pretty good with being able to pull herself out of these slumps, but she just couldn't this time. And she couldn't understand how they could still care for after is was her presence in the group that was going to keep holding them back. She had no biological family to talk to, no friends outside of the group besides her former members who were busy still training to debut, no siblings. Nothing. She couldn't remember the last time she felt this alone.

Their manger came in and started moving all of them to the set to do their interview. Nari smiled and answered questions that were directed towards her only. She let the others answer most of them. Then the host turned towards her, a bright smile. "Nari, I'm sure being the only girl in the group is stressful at times. How does it feel to be the only female member?" She hesitated on her answer but smiled brightly. "At first I didn't know how fans were going to react, but they were all very supportive. And it's great how much all the boys look out for me and care for me. It really feels like a family. Sure, there is a pressure that I need to match up to them, but they are really good at reminding me that I'm already the best for them." The interview smiled, pleased with her answer.

The interview ended shortly after and she was grateful when they arrived back to their hotel, slipping into her room and climbing into bed. She closed her eyes, contemplating whether if staying with the group was worth it. She was only holding them back and they'd never win anything if she stayed. She'd sacrifice her dream, her happiness for them. She sighed, throwing the pillows over her face and groaning. She needed to talk to the company.

The rest of ATEEZ was gathered in Seonghwa's and Yeosang's small hotel room. "We need to make her talk. Something is wrong." Jongho said, frowning. He was extremely worried about Nari and wasn't sure how to help. She was always there for them, always taking care of them and she needed it now and he felt foolish that he had no idea how to help her or what she needed. "I agree with Jongho. She's always there for us, she's always caring for us. Even when we don't' want it. We need to return that love." Yunho said. Hongjoong sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "How can we help if we have no idea what's going on? She's been distant for weeks. She dodges our questions. She doesn't even come and hang out with us after shows or interviews. She's isolating and I have no idea how to help."

Seonghwa patted his shoulder, "we'll figure something out but we need to do it fast." Yeosang sighed, standing up and walking towards the door. Everyone looked at him, confused. "I don't know about all of you, but I'm tired of this. I'm going there and I'm not leaving until she talks." He walked out of the room, towards Nari's and two seconds later the other 7 members were right behind him, a new determination on their mind. Yeosang knocked on Nari's door, loudly, waiting patiently for her to open it. A few moments later he heard the latch unlocked and the door opened. "What's up Ye-" she didn't even finish her sentence before Yeosang shoved the door open.

She was a little shocked that all her members had just barged into her room and were now sitting in various placing, staring at her intently. "What's up?" She asked nonchalantly but playing with the hem of her shirt, a tell tale sign she was nervous and anxious. Hongjoong kept a stern face, "we're not leaving until you talk to us and tell us what's going on." Nari sighed, closing her eyes. "For the millionth time, nothing is wrong! I'm just really tired." The excuse came out without her even having to think about it anymore. She found that a little sad. "You said during the interview we're your family, that you love how we take care of you and have your back and support you. We can't do that if you don't talk to us." Hongjoong said and Nari knew he was right. She averted her gaze to the floor.

"You're not alone, Nari." San said, gently placing his hand on her shoulder and guiding her to the bed. "We're here and we want to help."