ATEEZ 9th Member AU

Distance

Nari tries to put distance between her and San but San isn't having it

A/N: gets suggestive towards the end

Nari had replayed the small fight in her head with Mingi a thousand times over. As much as she was annoyed at how he inserted himself into her love life, she couldn't deny that he wasn't wrong. She had been being selfish; allowing herself to have San in ways that most would dream of. And she didn't want to hurt him if it never changed to anything more than that.

She had tried putting distance between them since her conversation with Mingi. No more were the secret rendezvous when they thought the others were sleeping or out. No more were the subtle touches that they thought none of the others noticed. No more was her neck or skin decorated in purple bruises that San seemed to love painting on her skin.

San, however, was not making it easy. He'd noticed how Nari had pulled away, how she was always trying to find a way to be around everyone else so that he couldn't pull her away for a secret kiss. How she would talk to him like normal, but there was minimal flirting and how she would barely meet his gaze most days. It was infuriating to no end.

Nari had told him that her and Mark had decided to just stay friends so, he knew there wasn't a possibility of her talking to him or trying to pursue anything. But, was there anyone else? Had she started talking to Ravn again? He had no idea and he definitely didn't want to ruin anything like that if it was true. San had always been a little selfish though.

His heart still longed for Nari and he would be lying if he said the distance she just started to randomly put between them didn't hurt. He'd always love her, in some way, he knew that. But they still hadn't talked about what they both wanted. San—being the selfish person he considered himself to be—knew he what he wanted. Nari. He'd always choose Nari, no matter where their paths took them.

Yet, he could admit both had been good at tiptoeing around that conversation. Both had been really good at switching the subject if conversation even approached that topic. Now though, he didn't want to tiptoe around it. He needed to know so that he could stop getting lost in his head. So he could stop trying to figure out what he had done wrong to make her want this distance.

"Earth to San!" He blinked as Nari snapped her fingers in front of his face. She offered him a teasing smile and that's all it took for his heart to melt. That's all it ever took. He offered her a small smile of his own, dark brown orbs swimming with nothing but love. But as per usual the past few days, she looked away and cleared her throat. "Joong wants me to go record a guide track today." San hummed in response, tapping his finger on the outside of his coffee mug.

They had a bit of a break lately, but as per usual, their ever-dedicated leader was already working on their next album. Usually they all would be helping, not wanting Hongjoong to feel like he had to bear all the work on his own. But with promotions just ending, filming their reality show for Kakao, and end of the year award shows quickly creeping up on them, they all just wanted a day or two to be lazy and be teenagers.

"What time?" San asked and listened as Nari told him times and what she was going to be doing. He listened even though he knew what it all entailed. He had helped record guide tracks a few times, but it was Nari talking and her voice was like honey to him. It soothed him. She placed her hand on his and he jumped a little, not realizing he was once again, lost in his head. She sucked in her bottom lip and pulled her hand away, tucking some hair behind her ear. San wanted nothing more than to kiss her right now.

"S-sorry. Didn't mean to startle you. Are you okay? You seem. . .lost." San nodded, giving her what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "I'm fine. You should go before Joong gets mad. You know he hates waiting." She let out a chuckle, waving goodbye. San sat there for a few more minutes in silence, lost in his head yet again. He decided that he needed to talk to her. He would do that tonight.

When Nari returned home, she was more than exhausted. She forgot that she was only recording a guide track and not the actual album songs and had asked to re-record some songs a million times. Hongjoong, of course, didn't tell her no. He wanted her to be happy with what she produced, even if it was only a guide track. She sighed, slipping on her slippers and making her way to her room.

What she didn't expect was to be pulled into a different room—quite roughly—and pressed against the wall. She looked up and made out San's face in the dark. His arms were caging her head in and he was dangerously close to her. She held her breath, sucking in her bottom lip, forcing herself to keep from slamming her lips on his. "S-San?" She stuttered out.

One of his hands came to gently grip her chin in between his fingers, forcing her to look up at him. She felt her breath hitch and heart rate speed up at the emotion and lust she saw in his eyes. "I want to know why you're avoiding me." He leaned in, whispering in her ear. She felt goosebumps erupt over her body as his breath hit her ear. She closed her eyes, hands moving to grip his waist and unconsciously pull him closer.

He didn't pull back, letting her pull him in until they were practically pressed up against each other. "I-I'm not a-avoiding you." She stuttered out and he clicked his tongue, placing a small kiss on her shoulder where her shirt had slightly fallen off. She shivered and he couldn't help but smirk. "You are, princess." She sighed, squeezing his hips a little tighter. "I d-don't want to hurt you." She mumbled.

This did cause San to back up a little, staring down at her. "What do you mean?" Her shoulders slumped and she hung her head. "Mingi came to talk to me the other day. Said that he didn't want me playing around with your heart and I don't want to. I 've been being selfish and we both know we have yet to have that conversation. I-I don't want to hurt you." San sighed, pushing himself up against her again.

She gasped as he placed a kiss on her neck. "What about what I want?" She only hummed, trying very hard to focus on his words and not the light kisses he was trailing across her exposed skin or the way his leg was perfectly perched in between hers. "W-what do you want?" She gulped and San chuckled a little, meeting her hazy gaze head on. "You. It's always you. And it's fine if you don't want me back. We can keep doing this and just see where it goes. But I love you and I always will. I'll always choose you."

She felt tears well up in her eyes, but not sad ones. Happy ones. Part of her thought he didn't feel the same anymore, that he had moved on. She was so relieved to hear that he still loved her the way she loved him. "I love you, too." She whispered before giving in and finally slamming her lips against his. Sure, they hadn't talked completely about what this was or how they wanted it to go. But they could do that tomorrow, in the morning.

Right now, all Nari wanted to do was become a withering mess under him while he kissed her everywhere.