Three Means Coffee

95

Monika woke up hearing the clinking of dishes. She stood up, confused, and tried to force her brain to properly register what was happening around her. She got up and immediately regretted it, surprised by the back pain that accompanied it. She was surprised because this had never happened to her when she got out of bed. She didn't remember why she was sleeping on the couch, especially since she was covering herself with a blanket.

She looked around and saw Tymek's smiling face in front of her, inviting her to breakfast. It's true that his job was more about helping than actually preparing food, but he tried. The woman sat down at the table, where after a while coffee and a mountain of sandwiches appeared.

"I hope you'll forgive me that these are just sandwiches, but I'm not a very good cook," Przemek sat next to Tymek and across from her.

"I'm also not very good at it," Monika replied, reaching for the food. "I hope I can practice this a bit since my cousin is dating a professional who is also our neighbour."

The atmosphere wasn't awkward, but it wasn't the most pleasant either. Tymek behaved strangely calmly, ate with relish and waited for permission to turn on the cartoons. He woke up earlier and was initially shocked that Przemek was still there, reading something at the kitchen table. He pointed to my sleeping mother and said he didn't want to move her and wake her up by accident. The boy then asked where he was sleeping and was suspicious of the man's answer that he was sitting and watching his mother, so he fell asleep in the chair. However, he suggested that they make their mother breakfast, which Tymek could agree to and suggested where to find something in their kitchen.

The truth was that Monika fell asleep tired of crying in Przemek's arms, and he managed to wake up and get up before her son, thanks to which they avoided an awkward situation. The woman now couldn't look him in the eye and wondered how to apologize to him for her behaviour the night before. She didn't know which of the man's words had an effect on her like a pin that pierced the bubble she had been hiding in until now.

Suddenly she felt the need to throw out everything that had accumulated inside her over the years with these tears. The feeling of loneliness and lack of support, the anger that she stewed within herself, and also at herself when she lacked strength.

She cried for herself, for the image of an independent, doing well mother that she had carefully cared for and built over the years, and at the same time it was on the verge of falling apart. She regretted all the situations when she didn't allow herself even a single tear because she had to be strong for Tymek.

She cried for her family, who withdrew from her, limiting contact to a minimum, ashamed of her attitude and such an early pregnancy. She was treated like a second-class relative who wasn't even worth talking to, but who was invited because it was still appropriate.

She cried over her son, blaming herself for not being able to give him everything she wanted, especially at the beginning. She couldn't give him a complete family, which the other children didn't understand and often came into conflict with him because of it.

But most of all she cried for her heart, closed and voiceless in her life. After all, she let it rule, if someone decided to get it, they had to first cleanse themselves and shed some of the burden of responsibility.

Przemek smiled at her when he finally managed to catch her eye for a moment. He wanted to tell her that she didn't have to apologize to him for anything and that she still remembered his words from the night before. Monika understood the message, and hid her face in her hands, laughing inwardly with happiness. She absolutely did not expect such an ending, just like Fate, who gently tapped her on the shoulder congratulating her.