Maybe Someday; Sam Winchester

Chapter Ninety-Five

     Cielo glared down at the Mark of Cain on her arm, biting the inside of her cheek in thought. She slaughtered a whole house because the life of a girl was in danger. She had to keep from trying anything and everything to keep from scratching at it. Had to keep from snapping. Had to keep from being her.

     She ached to have something in her hands and let it out on some monster, but after the last time, they figured that they should shut her down whenever she suggested the go on a hunt. And they've done a pretty good job with it, dealing with her arguments, but it would only go so far and they all knew it.

     Sam especially knew it. Her words rang through his head every time he saw her twitch uncomfortably and distract herself.

     I don't wanna be this, Sam. I need it off.

     He was doing everything he could for her, and now talking with Castiel about that night with Claire and Randy, she scared him at her sudden appearance.

     "What was it?" She questioned, walking into the library with Sam, Dean, and Castiel. Sam jumped to his feet, turning to look at her.

     He looked over at the other two in panic before looking at her. "Cielo..."

     "I know," she tells him, walking up to the table and staying there, looking at the three men in front of her. "It was a massacre. I..." she sighs, looking down at her hands and picks at the fresh set of black nail polish that Diana had done the day before.

     "I lost control again," Cielo says honestly. "I'm... I'm a killer," she admits, swallowing down the lump in her throat as she looks up at them again. "You can say it, okay? You'll be completely right. I crossed a line that shouldn't have to have been there in the first place. I physically can't have the mark anymore," she pleaded.

     Dean nodded at her, looking between Sam and Cas. "That won't be easy," Castiel tells her gently.

     "Then burn it off," she pleads. "Cut off my arm for all I care, isn't there something?"

     "It's more than just a physical thing," Cas explains. "It will take a very powerful force to remove the effect."

     "Sweetheart, we have been through all the lore," Sam tells her, his voice low and trying to comfort her. She bites the inside of her cheek, looking up at him. "There's nothing."

     Cielo sniffs, biting back her frustration and her tears.

     "This reaches back to the time of creation," Castiel adds. "It may predate the lore. If we had the demon tablet, maybe."

     "But you said it was missing," Dean tells Cas.

     "It is," Castiel replies.

     Cielo sighs, running a hand through her hair as she restricts herself from yelling at them, from doing something she'll regret again. There's a beat of silence, everyone in the room equally amount of stress.

     "There may be another way," Castiel says thoughtfully, looking over at Cielo. She looks at him hopefully, her spirits already being lifted. But when she hears the plan, her spirits fall again.

     She leaves the room for a breather, immediately going outside and sitting on the steps by the door and doesn't bother closing the door because she knows Sam is right behind her. And he is, because he comes out and sits next to her.

     "There has to be something else," she mutters holding her hands. "Anything other than..."

     Sam gulps, nodding in agreement as he looks down at his hands and spins his ring around. "This is the only shot we got," he tells her.