Xia Yao and his mum moved to a different city, because his parents got divorced. Xia Yao was happy about it, since his dad used to be very abusive towards the both of them. Xia Yao applied for a job as an assistant in a big company, where he started...
This is only a filler chapter, but it is quite important for Xia Yao's and Yuan Zong's relationship!
The next chapter will be longer and more exciting! ;)
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Xia Yao's POV
It's been a couple of days since Zhen Zhen came to visit us. He was starting to like Yuan Zong more and more as the days went by, even asking me to take a picture of them.
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It made me happy, that Zhen Zhen approved of my relationship with Yuan Zong, since he was also an important person in my life.
But I also couldn't stop thinking about what Zhen Zhen told me. Was I really supposed to have sex with Yuan Zong? Did Yuan Zong really want it? I mean, surely he would have told me that or at least mentioned it. Was I even ready to fully give myself to him? No, I wasn't. But I still wanted to make Yuan Zong happy, to please him. Maybe I should get over it and finally give him what he really wants from me. Or so Zhen Zhen thought he did. I was scared, I really was. After all, it would be my first time, our first time and I wanted it to be special, wanted myself to be ready and comfortable. I didn't want Yuan Zong to torture himself, by holding back his sexual desires towards me, but it was still very sweet of him that he did what he did. It meant a lot to me, too, that he didn't force me into something I wasn't ready and comfortable for.
I still wasn't ready. But I had to do it, for Yuan Zong. I didn't want him to get tired of me and then leave me eventually. I knew that he wasn't like that, but my self-esteem told me otherwise. Yuan Zong was a handsome and responsible man, he could have anyone he wanted in a heartbeat. Yet, he chose me. Me, Xia Yao, with no experience whatsoever.
How was I supposedto please him? How was I supposed to approach that topic?
"Hey, babe. Let's have sex?" No. Definitely not.
I guess I would never find out, until I tried it.
So I went into his office, where I knew he was working in. But as I opened the door, I saw that he was on the phone, motioning for me to stay quiet, so I walked out again, letting out a sigh of relief. Maybe I should have waited until night time.
I couldn't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day. I tried to distract myself as much as possible, by cleaning the house, talking to Zhen Zhen or calling my mother, even, to check up on her. But nothing worked. I even avoided facing Yuan Zong for a bit, which was only causing me pain. I didn't want to hide from my own boyfriend, the only person who made me happy right now.
Even Zhen Zhen noticed my weird behaviour and confronted me about it, but I just pushed him away and told him, that it was nothing he had to worry about.
So later, when Yuan Zong and I were laying in bed, ready to go to sleep, I just went for it. There was no going back now, I couldn't just pussy out. This had to be done.
So I jumped on top of him and peppered his neck with wet kisses, sucking and biting at it, which caused him to let out a gasp of surprise.
"Xia Yao, babe, calm down." He grabbed my face and pulled it away from his neck.
"We have work tomorrow, I don't want you to be exhausted and tired, tomorrow. Come on, let's go to sleep." He said, but I just shook my head, letting out shaky breaths.
"I n-need you, please. Love me, don't hold back. I'm all yours, do whatever you want with me right now." I whispered, feeling unsure already. This didn't feel right.
"No, love, calm down. You need to sleep. I will love you tomorrow, alright?" I felt like he still didn't really know what I was hinting on or planning to do.
"I know you want it, want me. Have sex with me. Come on, fuck me." It wasn't really me speaking, but more like Zhen Zhen's words taking control.
"Come on. I know you want it. Fuck me, just how you want it." I added and tried to take off his shirt, only to have him push my hands away.
Yuan Zong was speechless, shocked, even. This wasn't me. This wasn't his Xia Yao. This didn't feel right at all.
"This isn't you speaking, Xia Yao. Of course I want to make love to you, love, but not when you aren't in the right state of mind right now and especially not when you aren't ready for it." He slowly pushed me off of him.
He laid me on the bed and wrapped his arms around me from behind, spooning me and pressing me further against his body.
I didn't say anything back, I felt myself shake and tear up. He was just so wonderful. Of course he would notice me not being ready. He wasn't easy to fool and if I thought about it, I was glad that he wasn't.
"I love you, my precious boy. Don't force yourself into anything, I will always wait for you and love you. Forever and always, remember?" He said and I stroked his cheek, looking him deep in the eyes.
I didn't say anything back.
"I don't d-deserve you." I told him after a while. Which was true. Why did he have to be so wonderful? What did I do to deserve him?
"You are so patient with me, holding back your desires, just because I am not ready. I just didn't want you to eventually get tired of me and then break up with me." I added, feeling tears well up in my eyes once again. I hated how vulnerable I was, it made me seem so weak.
And also, Yuan Zong could have easily had his way with me, thinking that I really was ready for it now. But he didn't. He was so incredibly patient with me and willing to wait for me. Who did that nowadays?
"Your body needs to be cherished, always. It takes time, of course you are not ready. And I understand that. We have all the time in the world. And me, breaking up with you? Never in a million years, baby. I love you, you are the most beautiful and important person in my life, Xia Yao. As long as I have you, I don't need anything else." He told me, kissing my forehead afterwards. How was I supposed to top that, now? He always knew how to cheer me up. Always.
"You are amazing, my handsome man. I'm sorry." I turned around and gave him a gentle kiss, before cuddling further into him. I was still feeling so emotional and so incredibly overwhelmed with everything.
"Never apologize for something that is not your fault. Do you hear me? I don't want you to ever say that again, alright?" I just nodded.
"Words, Xia Yao."
"Yes." He pressed another kiss to my cheek, before turning the lights off.
He truly was my happiness.
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Short little chapter for you guys, I hope you guys aren't mad 😩
