Secret Mistake 3

129.

GIA POV

That night I couldn't believe what was coming out of Delano's mouth. You know like they say when you're drunk you speak truths. I guess that's the way he truly felt about me. Harlow and Salem slept with me last night. Nothing was asked or said about what they saw. Ryan just stood by the door for a short time watching me. I told him it was okay he could go to sleep. He was hesitant but he did what I asked.

Feeling so guilty for our kids to see that. Salem was scared she never saw us like that. I couldn't sleep at all my mind was racing. Kai seemed disappointed. He said nothing but his face said everything. That night I had a big panic attack. All that Delano was saying triggered it. I've heard all of what he said over and over growing up. For him to feel that way towards me.

See told you no one would want you!

You're so stupid!

He was better off without you!.

Closing my eyes cause I haven't heard the voices in a short while. Delano ended up leaving after Ryan subdued him. I have no idea where he went nor do I care. Christmas was tomorrow and it doesn't feel like it. The kids were off for a full week and a day. After what happened I know they needed a safe haven.

Slowly removing myself from Harlow's grasp. I let them sleep. Walking to the kitchen I saw Ryan there. He looked up at me "Are you okay?".

"Yeah I'm good. Did you sleep?" I asked.

"Not really" He said.

"I'm sorry you saw that last night" I said.

"What happened?" He asked. Ryan is old enough to somewhat understand now. "I told dad about K and the money he left. Also, that K and I were together when dad and I broke up. But while we were together we did kiss but that's it. And he's hurt".

"But he cheated on you with Bria. So why is he upset?" He asked.

"I guess cause I gave K more than I gave your dad" I said.

"Okay? But doesn't make it right for him to come in here saying those awful untrue things to you. It won't help solve the problem. That guy last night I don't who that was. Cause it wasn't my dad" he said.

"Ryan your dad is struggling just like how I'm struggling. What he did last night was the only he knew to express his anger and hurt" I said.

"Are you taking up for him?" He asked.

"No, of course not. Look K left me his penthouse hoe would you feel we all go there and spend Christmas there?" I asked.

"Is dad coming? Cause if he is I'm not going" he said.

"No he's not coming" I said.

"Good then let's go" he said.

"Well go pack and tell Kai too. I know he was disappointed. I feel like crap that you all saw that last night. Trying my best to keep the craziness out but he keeps sleeping in" I said.

"It doesn't help to take on the guilt. Let's just pack and go" he said.

Ryan walked to his room and I went to the girls room and started packing a small bag. It sucks it has to come to this. We should be spending Christmas together as a family.

//

When we pulled up to the huge building it was starting to snow. Salem stepped out the car in smiles "I love snow!". Ryan helped me with the bags. We walked inside quickly and into the elevator. "Is the penthouse the same way it was before?".

I shrugged "I have no idea".

When the doors opened up I walked up to the front door and opened it. The first thing you saw was the huge Christmas tree. You can tell he just decorated for the season.

Salem and Harlow was besides themselves as they walked in. "Whoa!".

Kai didn't say anything. He walked inside and sat down. Ryan glanced at me "he's upset". Taking a seat next to Kai "I'm sorry!".

"I never saw dad like that" he said.

"No one has but he was hurting" I said.

"Yeah but he said some mean things to you" he said.

"He did. I know. But let's try and focus on Christmas coming tomorrow" I said. He hugged me tight and smiled. He ran off with Ryan to check out the rooms. K's penthouse had these huge windows that had a sick view of the city. I stood at the window just trying to breathe. Trying to exist for our children. Hearing Salem running around and Harlow yelling at Salem to stop running.

I needed to hear this noise. Anything to block out the voices from coming back.