infinite shades of blue (journal part I)

~118~

you hurt me
actually you hurt a bunch of us old friends

happy new year to us, right?

Cynthia said you were supposed to meet on the 30th for goodbyes
but then you bailed on her because of work
at the same time you told me you had a day-off on the 30th

I guess all I really want to know is
why did you lie?
why was it so hard for you to find time for us
your life-long best friends
in your busy schedule?
it was always about priorities, wasn't it?
and somehow
now that I look back
I realise we were never yours

I know I haven't always been a good friend
not to Vanessa at least
I know I've hurt people
but nobody deserves this shit
not a soul on this planet deserves to be left without a goodbye
convinced that the 13 years of our friendship doesn't stand a chance against some guy you met a year ago
the same guy you never bothered to introduce to us properly

and the worst part is
you made it all look so easy