Love, Not War (Book 2)

Chapter 89

Felix's heart dropped down to the pit of his stomach and his breath siezed as he imagined the whole scene. The kinds of things his friends had done to drive a girl to end her own life. The mental and physical torture she must have gone through. He couldn't stop the tears that flowed down his cheeks. "H-How could she suddenly do that? W-What did you guys do?" he stuttered. "You said she was warming up to me. There must have been something right? What did you guys do?"

Seeing Felix cry made tears well up in Jeongin's eyes. He recalled the way Mr Yoongi shot Lisa and he whole body went cold with fear. "I-I didn't do it on purpose" he answered. "I didn't know. I just went along with whatever Lisa said because I thought Aera betrayed you. I thought she cheated on you"

"And so what if she did?" Felix cried. "It wasn't your business. It was ours. It was our life!"

Jeongin shook his head and wiped his tears. "That wasn't how things worked then. I had this stupid title. The Gossip Lord. Everybody's business was my business and I could do whatever I wanted with any information I got. That was my life"

Felix scoffed. "What are you even saying? She killed herself because of you"

"It wasn't just me okay." he defended. "Lisa was the mastermind. She was the one who told me to make a fake recording of you saying that everything between you and Aera was all part of a dare. That you didn't love her and you were just playing her"

"Fuck" Felix cursed angrily. "And you just went along with it"

"At that time I thought it was fun" Jeongin said, lowering his head in shame. "I made up fake content all the time. It just seemed like something trivial. I had no idea that it would be the last straw for Aera. I really didn't. Believe me Felix. I regret it from the bottom of my heart."

"Well it's too late for that now isn't it?" Felix sniffed as he wiped his tears with his palms. "She's already gone and it's all your fault"

Although he couldn't remember, he could still feel the pain. Like a million needles were being pushed into his heart. "Why didn't you tell me all this before?" he asked. "I followed you for days, begging you to tell me what happened but you refused"

"I was scared okay!" Jeongin shouted, exasperated. "I was afraid of how you'll see me after knowing the truth. I know what I did and I'm extremely sorry for it. Just please, don't turn me away because of this. Don't leave me Felix"

Felix didn't reply to that. Instead he lowered his voice and asked, "What about Rose and Lisa? Did Chan kill them?"

"No. His father killed Lisa" Jeongin replied. "Well, his adopted father. Their family stuff is complicated so you should ask him about that. As for Rose, her story is entirely different. I'll tell you about her another time"

"So Chan didn't kill anyone" Felix wanted to clarify

Jeongin nodded and Felix sighed. He was actually relieved. Although he didn't blame Chan for wanting revenge, he also didn't want Chan to kill anyone.

"I've changed Felix" Jeongin said. Felix had given him the chance to change. The chance to be a good person. "I'm not that stupid reckless teenager anymore. I deeply regret what I did and I will never do anything like that again so please, don't treat me differently. Don't stop being my friend"

Felix remained silent for a long long time. He just couldn't get what was in the head of his friends that made them do such things. He took his water and downed it in a few gulps then sighed heavily. "This is a lot to take in Jeongin. I mean, the friends I knew and grew up with were arrogant proud brats. Hell I was one of you so I get the wasting money part, the bullying, the gossip stuff, but pushing Aera to the very limit, that's just too much. How could you guys have gone so far?"

"I think it all got to our heads" Jeongin sniffed. "The twisted power we got from being feared by our peers. But see where that got us now. Two of our friends are gone and Jisung...I don't know where the hell that guy is. He just...disappeared. I'm only here because Chan forgave me. If not, I'llbe rotting away in prison."

Felix wanted to know why Chan forgave Jeongin but that was a question only Chan could answer. He understood everything Jeongin just told him but at the same time, he didn't. He just didn't know what to think or say. "What about Jisung?" he asked, deciding to leave Aera's topic for a while.

"Can we talk about him another time?" Jeongin asked, feeing drained. "I'll need another drink to be able to talk about him and I don't want to get drunk. I have to go to the site early tomorrow"

"Alright" Felix nodded. "But you'll tell me everything. Including the part about me and Chan."

Jeongin agreed.

Besides, talking about Aera was enough for one night. They stood up and Jeongin paid the bill then they went out of the bar. They walked slowly side by side on the sidewalk of the nearly empty streets, both lost in their own thoughts. The area they ran to was remote. Just a few people walking about or hanging around.

As the two made their way back to the Park's residence, the night got colder. There was a cresent moon shining in the sky and countless stars scattered all over, brightening the streets. It felt quite peaceful as people came and went, cars zooming down the streets and aromas of different kinds of food from different restaurants filled the air.

Felix kept mulling over Jeongin's words all through the way and he sighed. Although Jeongin was one of the reasons Aera died, Felix couldn't bring himself to hate him. They've been through so much together and if Chan could forgive Jeongin then why couldn't he? Besides, he could tell that Jeongin truly regretted his past actions.

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