Love, Not War (Book 2)

Chapter 59

As the chilling water poured into his hair, down his neck and body, his closed his eyes and regulated his breathing, trying his possible best to calm himself down. After all, he just recalled some things about himself that his cousins and friends never told him about.

The memories he just recalled, they were of he and his friends and Felix was very sure all the things they did together were not done in the first year alone, before his accident.

They were done after.

But it didn't correlate at all. That was what confused him.

If he was in a coma for two years, then when did they make all those memories? Could it be that he was never in a coma? It would also explain how he felt that he knew Chan but none of it made sense to him. If he wasn't in a coma then why didn't he remember anything about the second and third year of high school?

Felix tried to recall more but he couldn't. His head didn't hurt much but he felt like there a huge wall blocking him. Stopping him from digging out more.

Fuck.

Having inconsistent memories sucked. He raised his head and the cold water poured over his face, making him feel better.

Maybe he should just ask his brothers. They would surely clear things up.

********

"Well you look like shit" Jimin said, pushing a plate of waffles towards Felix. "I thought I forbade you from drinking"

"I didn't drink" Felix said, annoyed. He squeezed his cheeks and groaned. "I just don't feel so good. I-I have these dreams. Well that would be in the night but when I'm awake, I get these flashes and then a terrible headache. It makes me feel irritated"

Hearing that, Jimin became alarmed. He placed his chopsticks down and focused. "What do you mean? What dreams? What flashes?"

Felix sighed. From Jimin's expression, he could already tell that they were hiding something from him. Still, he pretended not to be aware. "I don't know. I don't understand. They're like fragments of memories. I see them from time to time and I don't even understand what they mean. The worst thing is that most of them revolve around Chan"

"That's why you keep asking if you've known Chan before" Jimin concluded and Felix nodded. "The dreams I have about him are quite strange. I don't know what to do"

Jimin raised a hand to his chin, rubbing as he tried to look natural despite the panic bubbling in his heart.  "Maybe they actually don't mean anything" he said with a smile then pushed a can of whipped cream towards him. "I think you shouldn't think about this too much. You like him don't you? Maybe that's why you dream about him"

Thinking it was possible, Felix blushed but quickly lowered his head to hide it from Jimin. He took the can of whipped cream and sprayed some on his waffles. "I see flashes of my friends too. Lisa, Jisung and Rose. I remember the times we hung out. All the fun we had"

The panic in Jimin's heart multiplied and he stealthily took his phone and sent an emergency text to Seonghwa. His actions did not go unnoticed by Felix.

Felix further solidified the fact that they were hiding something from him. Something big. Something important.

"Maybe you just miss them" Jimin said as he placed back his phone and pushed back his pink hair nervously. nervously. It was evident. Ever since Chan came back into Felix's life, Felix had been asking them If he knew Chan before. They had all denied it. But now, Felix's memories were coming back. It was little but he could tell that Felix was starting to doubt some things.

He internally heaped a load of curses on Chan. If they hadn't met, Felix would not be remembering anything. They had to do something fast.

His acting skills were non-existent so Felix could tell that Jimin was panicking. "Of course I miss them" he said. "But these flashes, they just don't add up with what I remember"

"I think you should stop thinking about them" Jimin hurriedly said. "They're already gone Felix. You have other friends now. So many of them. Maybe you just miss your friends abroad. How about we go back? Just me and you?"

He had hope that if they go back, Felix won't regain his memories and the pain that came with them. He'd forget Chan in a few months and live normally. Happily.

"And what about me?" they heard a deep voice say.

"Shit!" Jimin and Felix both felt their hearts jump in fear. They turned to find Chan standing at the entrance of the dining room, exuding a kind of chill that made them want to shrink their necks in fear. His face was blank but the anger in his eyes were evident. He stared straight at Felix, making Felix wish he could just disappear.

The servant that had tried hard to stop Chan from entering the house without permission came running. He stopped by the door and bent at the waist, panting heavily. "I'm sorry! I tried to stop him but he didn't listen!"

"What about me, Felix?" Chan asked as he entered the dinning room, walking towards Felix, step by step. The crisp sound of his shoes sounded like a death sentence. Jimin and Felix didn't know it but they were holding their breaths, eyes wide as Chan approached. He didn't stop until he was standing close to Felix. Chan invaded his personal space, using his fingers to lift Felix's chin, making sure they were eye to eye. Felix's heart was galloping faster than a race horse. He felt as if he was caught cheating.

Chan lowered his head until their noses were a finger's width away from touching. "What about us?" he asked, his minty hot breath fanning Felix's lips. "You said you want to go steady with me three days ago. Now, you want to run away?"

"N-No!" Felix hurriedly said. He was well aware of their closeness in front of Jimin so he couldn't help but blush. A light pink hue covered his cheeks and ears and he pushed Chan's fingers away, ducking his head. "I'm not going to leave" he mumbled. "It was Jimin hyung who suggested it. I haven't given him an answer yet"

Chan forcefully pushed down the fear and anger in him that were struggling to erupt. He balled his fists, trying to gain some control over his body and mind then stepped away from Felix, allowing him to breathe. "Then give him one now. What is your answer?"

Felix bit his lip then turned to Jimin, who sat there, now glaring at Chan. He didn't like the hold Chan had over Felix's heart. Felix may not realise it yet but it was there. The memories might have disappeared for a while but the feelings, they never left. It was like they were lying there dormant, just needing a trigger to burst open and Chan was that trigger.

Jimin felt that coming back to Korea with Felix was a big mistake.

"I don't want to go back" Felix said, discreetly looking at Chan and his heart eased when he saw Chan breathe a sigh of relief. "Not until the holidays are over anyway"

The gloom in Chan's eyes disappeared instantly and he once again invaded Felix's personal space. He brushed the brown locks to the side and planted a chaste kiss on Felix's forehead.

Chan's lips were soft and they sent a kind of warmth throughout Felix's body.

Chan had been itching to see Felix again after their lunch date at the site yesterday. He didn't get to call Felix in the night for he had a lot of work to do so he decided to visit before heading to the office today. He just never expected to hear them planning to leave Korea again.

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