Love, Not War (Book 2)

Chapter 128

"I know" Felix said, walking in a trance like state. "This is unbelievable. I'm still in shock."

"Oh this is very little compared to the one you'll get when that dinner holds." Jeongim smirked.

Felix froze. "Holy shit you're right! There's dinner too! What are we going to do?"

"We?" Jeongin chuckled. "You mean you. This doesn't concern me in any way. I hope you guys find a solution though."

He then entered the car and turned it on. "Call me if anything major happens. You know I love the gossip."

Felix wished he could kick the idiot. "Just get out of here already."

Jeongin burst out laughing then drove off. Felix shook his head and sighed. Time to pretend he never saw anything.

********

"And? And?" Hyunjin asked, eyes wide while stuffing popcorn into his mouth.

"And they kissed!" Felix exclaimed.

Hyunjin squealed. "Oh my God! Our Jiminie is in loooooov-"

Felix quickly smacked Hyunjin with a pillow. "Hey keep it down! He'll hear you!"

Hyunjin snorted. "I doubt it. He must be up there having a romantic phone call with his boo. Well, this is expected. I was wondering when he'll get a partner. Turns out he has an old flame. I wonder how they got together. Maybe they were high school sweethearts."

Felix sighed. So much for trying to pretend he didn't see anything. Well, in his defence, it was too much of a shock to keep to himself.

They were in Felix's room, sitting on Felix's bed. Gisting while eating popcorn.

"Damn this is hot news." Hyunjin said. "Your boyfriend's father and your brother are long lost lovers. Oh my God."

"He's not my boyfriend anymore." Felix muttered, pursing his lips. "We broke up remember?"

"Yeah keep telling yourself that" Hyunjin said with a wave of his hands. "Aw damn I so wanna tease our little mochi so muuuuuch."

"Well you didn't hear it from me" Felix chuckled. "What do you think will happen if we all meet for dinner?"

Hyunjin shrugged. "Mr Yoongi will find out you're alive and probably want to kill you again."

"What?!" Felix exclaimed and Hyunjin burst out laughing. "Relax. This happened five years ago. His anger should have subsided already and if it hasn't, he won't harm you if he truly loves his little mochi. Besides, Chris will never let anyone harm you. Not even his father."

Felix sighed and laid on the bed, hugging a pillow to his chest. He remembered Chan's letter and he wished he woke up when Chan was writing it so he could have stopped him from leaving. He really missed him.

"Is it weird that I broke up with him but I miss him so much?" He held the locket and toyed with it, rolling it around his fingers. "Mingi said he's in China for work and therapy. He said I shouldn't disturb him. I can't even contact him. Only Mingi can. Right when I decided to hear him out. This is not fair."

"Oh my poor baby" Hyunjin cooed. He crawled on the bed and laid behind Felix, hugging him from behind. "Life isn't always fair but you should give it time okay. You should give Chris some time too. After all, he's trying to become a better man for you."

"But he doesn't have to do it so far away" Felix complained. His heart felt heavy and tears pooled in his eyes. "I really miss him. I wish I hugged him and listened to him yesterday. He was crying a lot outside. I've never seen Chan cry so much before. It broke my heart but I couldn't ask him to stay because of my stubbornness."

Hyunjin stayed quiet, listening as he stroked Felix's hair.

"He had a panic attack and he thought I was dead" Felix continued. "Everytime I remember that look of despair on his face and then the joy when he realised I was alive, my heart breaks more and more. It made me wish I had listened to him. I wish I gave him a chance to explain himself. I broke my promise to him."

He turned to face Hyunjin. "Do you even know how bad of a boyfriend I've been? And I don't just mean now but all along. Even five years ago. I was never a good boyfriend. I was a horrible horrible boyfriend. Did you know Chan was in pain? He's always in pain and he's always hiding it from me. Or maybe I just didn't notice. I was so consumed in my own feelings that I never thought about his own. I never cared to ask him if he was okay. Hyung, how do you think Chan is feeling right now? He's hurt right? He's hurt that I broke our promise. He's hurt that I didn't listen to him."

"Oh darling" Hyunjin said, wiping Felix's tears. "But you're hurt too. You're both hurt."

"But he's hurting more than I am." Felix cried. "He always has."

Hyunjin sighed. "Do not measure pain Felix. Pain is pain no matter how severe. Chan wouldn't want you beating yourself up over this. He wouldn't want to see you crying like this. You know how he is. He keeps to himself. I doubt he would have ever admitted to you even if you had asked."

"B-But-"

"No buts" Hyunjin said as he continued to wipe Felix's tears. "I know being apart hurts Felix. You must miss him like crazy but you have to endure. For his sake and your sake."

Felix nodded. "I know. I just miss him so much that I want to book a flight to China. I don't care where he is. I'll find him."

"Then what's stopping you?" Hyunjin asked.

"I-I- I don't want to be selfish" Felix wailed. "I'm okay now but he may not be. I want to see him and hug him so tight but I don't want to ruin his progress. I know he won't be mad at me for it but I can't do it."

Hyunjin smiled. "My baby is all grown up. Think about it Felix. If you miss Chris this much, how much do you think he's missing you?"

"A lot?" Felix sniffled as he looked up at Hyunjin with tear filled eyes.

"So much more" Hyunjin chuckled. "He loves you a lot and he's trying to make things right. He's going to give you your identity back. Wait and see."

"But I don't care about that anymore" Felix grumbled. "I don't care about being Lee Felix again. I like this lifestyle. I just don't want to waste anymore time. I want to love him with all I have."

"And you will" Hyunjin assured. "Chris can't stay away from you for too long. No matter what measures Mingi took, Chan will always find a way. Just believe in your love."

Felix snuggled closer to Hyunjin. "I do. I do believe."

Hyunjin chuckled, stroking his hair. "What a baby. Don't worry. It'll all be okay."

Felix nodded. "Can you stay here with me tonight? I don't wanna be alone."

"Of course." Hyunjin answered. "I'm here. Go to sleep."

After all, Changbin was also in China with Chan.

Hyunjin couldn't help but smile. Contacting Felix was no problem at all.

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