BURN (Wattys2015?)

i have tasted the sun

i have tasted the sun

warm and sweet and happy

i have tasted it with my hands

and i liked the taste

but the cruelness of fate

has constantly tossed me into the shade

and i cannot taste the sun

but the memory of it

kept a sliver of bitter hope inside my tired heart

and begged me to chase after this glorious flavor

a cloud followed me on my journey

(the sunlight was so close

yet so out of reach)

i ran for the sun

i ran all the way to the sea

the spray dotted my face

and i could taste

saltwater

salty, bitter, and cold

like the tears on my face

the sea was unique and it had a passion

and it had an ancient rage

that was something to be admired

it was not the sun

and i was as gloomy as the sea

choppy and dark and sad

the sun was not at the sea

nighttime came

and i could see stars

they touched me

and sang a lullaby

to lure me into their celestial state

but the stars had no taste

they just had a brilliant light

and they all never stopped talking about the moon

they made the moon seem like a god

so i tasted the moon

but it had no taste

just a smell

faint and distant

a reflection of the sun

for so long i repeated the cycle

for so long i searched and longed for the sun

longed for belonging, longed for warmth

i was cold and bitter and jagged to the core

i was confused and restless

but all i wanted was to rest

and bask in the sun

i could hear thunder

behind the mountains

i could feel the rain

pepper me

i thought that maybe the rain

was the tears of the sun

because the sun

missed me, too

i had searched for too long

the cloud above me was my only friend

i realized that all journeys

eventually come to an end

and i was certainly ready for my end

so i curled up on the hard ground

and the dust filled my nose

the wind was strong and relentless

it howled and bit at me

but somehow my eyes couldn't stay open

and my body couldn't stay awake

and i slept for a while

and in my dreams

everything was okay

when i woke up

i discovered that the world hadn't changed

i still had a cloud above me

and i still had no sun

except i decided to stop searching for the sun

i decided to appreciate my surroundings

there was a magnificent beauty in the sea

and there was a beauty in the stars and moon

and there was a beauty in the cloud above me

i was unknown, i was small, i was in the shadows

but i was wild and free

i don't want to look for purpose

i'll just let it find me

i don't want to chase happiness and the sun

eventually, it'll chase me