One Direction Preferences✔️

Soundtrack Series • FOUR • 18

Harry: "Three years. You know someone for three years, and then just like that everything is gone and they're just another stranger." You wanted so badly to tell him to shut up. That he was talking nonsense, and that this was the best outcome for him. However, you couldn't bring yourself to let any of that out. You had invited him out here, and he had come. He was hurting and needed your compassion, not your inner thoughts. "Everything was so great back then. I was so sure she was with me for me. She never even used to go to the interviews. Do you remember that?" He looks up at you for a response. His head was on your chest as the two of you lay in the bed still. "Yeah, I remember," you answer, your hand continuing to comb through his hair. Surely all of this reminiscing wasn't good for him. He was going back to old memories he had no business revisiting; those times were long gone. Things had changed. She had changed. It hadn't always been like this, though, Harry was right about that. Your first impression of her was nothing but positive. But of course as soon as she starting bringing in the drama, your opinion of her quickly changed. She had been gone now for over two weeks, and here he was in LA with you. The situation was messed up to say the least. "I know we've been through some shit, but I swore we would be alright. I just knew we could get past it; we always had." You want so badly to speak up. To tell him that it was never going to work out with her once she started defying their relationship with her deceitful actions. She was trash as far as you were concerned and you were very happy that she was gone. But it was not your place to let any of that out at the moment, so you bite your lip and remain silent. "Maybe it was me. I must have messed up somewhere. I mean someone doesn't just change like that for no reason." You take a deep breath in, and his head slowly rises along with you. He was blaming this on him; the last thing he needed to be doing. You need to say something. This is where you should say something. "I don't know." It was all you could manage to get out. You had no experience in this whatsoever. Harry had comforted you plenty of times after failed relationships. You had less practice at it. Mainly because Harry had never come to you like this before. He had been through a few breakups since the two of you had known each other, however none he needed comforting after. This was new territory for you, and you were killing yourself on the inside for allowing him to even fathom the idea that this was his fault. You needed to say more. To tell him that this was not on him. He had done nothing wrong in this. However, yet again though, you couldn't bring yourself to say a word. This was his time. He needed to get all of this out, every last bit of it. No matter how untrue or hurtful it may be.
Liam: Every time you look at her, you go back. Before the band and before Mark. That name. You don't even like thinking of him, no matter if you had not met him. She sits across the hotel suite living room, her sister by her side. Big mistake there. You should have worked harder to keep that from happening. You needed her here and away from home and if that meant the sister was tagging along then you would just have to make it work. It wasn't working though and you didn't know how to change it. That was the problem. You can see her over there smiling at her phone screen, sharing whatever was causing the smile with her now chirpy other half. Wasn't that one meant to be depressed or something? You used to make her smile like that. What are you thinking? You still do. Bringing her along with you to Oz certainly brought out a smile, one bigger than Mark would ever bring. Mark. Just the name made you want to punch something. You hadn't even met the guy and you already wanted to cause him physical harm. Out of your mind, get him out of your mind. You continue to stare across the room, your gaze going unnoticed. She was the best thing about going home, she always had been. Yes, your family was obviously there, and she was like family, but there was more. There was always more. The two of you used to do everything together, never leaving one another's side for anything. It still remains that way, when you go back home at least. The problem is you aren't there enough, clearly. Otherwise, Mark would have never even been an option for her. Your schedule had screwed you there. Thoughts like this had been flooding your mind these last couple of days. You two were so close back then. Everything between you and her was so right, before the band, before Mark. She had always meant more to you than any other girl. Hence why you hadn't been able to keep a relationship. They always felt in competition with her and you had to admit they kind of were. You would always silently compare them to her, and that wasn't fair...to them. "Liam?" You hear and your thoughts disappear. "What?" "Were you having a vision?" Her sister teases and you realize they had noticed your stares now. "You know, you aren't that funny," you reply back, getting up from the couch you had been sitting on to move to another room. "Hey now." Your eyes lock on her and you can only smile, the same smile she had just had while looking at messages from Mark. She smiles back, and you continue to walk back to your bedroom. You needed time to clear your head. The time alone didn't last long because she had followed right behind you. "Everything alright?" She asks, standing in the doorway of the dark room. You turn on the bedside lamp and look at her. "Yeah, of course." It was a lie, but of course she would never expect you to tell her anything but the truth, or at least that's what you thought. She walks into the room, closing the door behind her and you raise an eyebrow. You sit down on the bed, crossing your legs at the ankle as she makes her way to the other side. She crawls in with you and your heart begins to subtly beat faster. "What's wrong?" She prods, resting her head on your shoulder, her arm reaching in around you while the other comes across you. You pull your arm out and bring her in closer. You weren't sure what she was up to, but you also weren't going to let her think twice about it. "I was just thinking about some things." "Like what?" She continues. She was going to make you tell her everything. "Just about how things used to be with us when we were younger." "Oh yeah? Were you thinking about all of those times I skunked you in snooker?" You laugh; of course she would bring that up. "Still trying to erase those memories." They were tough to handle, but you never want to forget any moment you had spent with her. It was always meant to be you and her, but with Mark that wasn't looking very promising.
Niall: Two weeks. You have been in this apartment for two weeks. You have been out of England for two weeks. And, of course, away from Niall for two weeks. The last one was the hardest though; you knew it would be. You knew you would be able to handle the job, handle being out of England, but knowing Niall isn't going to eventually come home is definitely the hardest part. You pour a glass of red wine and take a seat at the kitchen table. You need some time to think. After having a week to process Niall's outburst over Skype, your mind still wasn't over it. Surely he didn't mean what he said about you doing this to escape from him and his lifestyle. Surely he just misses you. He had sent you a message a few days after, apologizing for his words and for believing anyone else that wasn't you. It was you and him in this relationship, no one else. Thinking about him like this wasn't doing you any good. You missed him desperately. You were trying to be strong though. You had been away from one another a lot longer than this. You can't help it; your mind wanders, and you can't help but think you've made a mistake. You were meant to be with him, weren't you? But you were with him, just not physically. That's been your entire relationship, hasn't it? Well not the entire relationship. In the beginning, the part before the band, everything seemed so perfect, so stress free. You would see one another most days, the perks of living fairly close. You were so in love back then. Not that you didn't love him now; it's just every single aspect of your relationship was because of the love the two of you shared. Every touch, every kiss, every word spoken between you was adoration. You had no explanation for it at the time, and you still don't. You were just meant for each other. You take a sip from your glass, hoping for some sort of relief from your thoughts. It wasn't coming though. The thought of moving across the ocean, permanently away from him continued to flood your mind. "How fucking stupid can you be?!" You shout out into the silence. With no one to hear you, the tears begin to gloss over your eyes. You were so angry at yourself for allowing this to happen. You weren't meant to be here, meant to be this far away from him. Being away was his job, not yours. You finish your drink, slamming the glass down onto the table but not hard enough to break it. You needed more. You get up from your seat and head back to the cooler. You hadn't planned on opening this bottle, the one you were given from Kati as a housewarming gift, until you could enjoy it with others. However, this moment needed the alcohol's assistance. You ditch the glass, bringing your lips to the opening of the bottle. What has gotten into you? This isn't you. You don't act like this. You are stronger than this. It's been two weeks and you're already falling apart. You have your dream job, in your dream city. No one else deserves to be here more than you. And even though he had some shit to say a week ago, Niall had apologized. Everything was fine between the two of you. He was happy you were here, happy you were enjoying your job. What he wouldn't be happy about is you acting like this. Because that's exactly what it was, an act. You miss him, and you're letting that take over everything in you. You are better than this. You sit the bottle down, jamming the cork back into the top, before placing it back into the cooler. You are meant to be here. Life doesn't require Niall to be by your side all of the time. When had he really ever been? Well besides back when you were teenagers. That part of life was over now.
Louis: You were glad he had stayed. After last week, you needed all the support you could get. However, you couldn't help but think he was missing something. You were sure none of the other guys had been staying away from London this long. You knew they were heading to Australia soon, surely they had to be rehearsing or at least having meetings about the tour. You didn't want to bring it up though; you enjoyed him here. Waking up next to him was without a doubt one of the best feelings. A feeling you weren't naïve enough to believe would happen often. "What do you have to do today?" He asks, and you take a deep breath in, rolling over in the bed to face the ceiling. You aren't sure how he knew you were up, you had tried your best to stay still so you wouldn't wake him. "I've got to go to class at eleven." You hear him scoff and you turn your head over to see him snarling his nose at your responsibilities. "It's only for a few hours. I've got two classes today, and that's it. Four hours." "Four hours!" He growls yet again; your plans were yet to enthuse him. You laugh at his displeasure as you scoot in closer, wrapping your arm around his bare torso. "What are you going to do today?" You were actually wondering when he was planning on going back home. You didn't want him gone, but he had responsibilities of his own. "I guess I'm just going to lay around here until you get back. I don't really have a need to go out on my own for four hours." Not the answer you were looking for. You hesitate in your words, but your thoughts push them out. "When do you need to go back home?" You had tried to ask the question as nonchalantly as possible. "You want me gone?" He teases and you immediately relax at his response. "No, of course not. I was just wondering when you needed to get back to work." It was a legitimate concern but he wasn't feeling it. "Don't you worry about when I need to go back. It isn't any time soon." You didn't believe that. His phone had been ringing off the hook these last few days, and you were sure if you checked it now there would be plenty of messages. You let it go, though. The last thing you wanted to do was start something about a schedule you had yet to even be introduced to. "I'm just here to show you I want to be here. That all of this is worth it. Being with me is worth it. We were made for this," he explains as his arms hold you. You smile. His words were exactly what you need to hear in this moment. You had only been together for a short time, however it feels as if it's been years. You are still concerned about everything you're sure he is missing during the time he is spending with you. But, he is here to show you that he wants this and that he wants you to want this just as much.
Zayn: 'New song x'. That's all the message said. Attached was an audio clip, and all you can do is stare. He would send new things to you all of the time, especially when he was on the road. He always wanted to let you know what he was working on and get your opinion. You aren't sure why you're so nervous. Possibly because you don't know what is on the other side of that play button. And you're out in public; who knows how you're going to react. You take a few deep breaths in before getting off of the loud street. You walk into a small boutique, eyes watching you the moment you step foot through the door. It doesn't bother you anymore that everyone, everywhere seemingly knows who you are. You pull your headphones out of your bag, plugging them into your phone and placing the earbuds in your ears. You stand off to the side, keeping out of everyone's way, thus losing a lot of the attention. You take one more deep breath before pressing play. It was slow, something new. You listen as his bandmate starts off the song. You take in every word of the solo. When Zayn's voice appears you shut your eyes. He wasn't anywhere near you, but his voice was hard enough to listen to. Everything was so soft. Every word filled with meaning. The chorus comes in, a bit faster paced but still matching the tone of the lyrics. You were in love with the song about love. You can't help but smile, but quickly cover your mouth once you realize how strange it is what you're doing. The lyrics warmed your heart; a significant change from what it had been used to the last few weeks. He had been gone a week with not much coming from his end. Except this. You could not believe he had sent this to you. Yes, he used to do things like this all of the time. Love songs were his specialty. He always wanted you to know how much you meant to him and the best way he always found to do that was through sending you a song. Whether it be one of his or something else, it didn't matter. You always looked forward to them. The feelings they would give you let you know that what you shared with him was real. He hadn't sent you one in a while. Especially not one like this. Even though it was something he and his band had done, you could feel the connection. You felt what he was trying to say to you. You press play again, wanting to experience this feeling once more. You bite your lip when his voice comes on again. You imagine just him singing these lyrics to you. Him being the one to tell you that he knows that the two of you are going to be fine. That what the two of you have is indeed love because you were made for one another. He hadn't made you this emotional in a while. Maybe this was his apology. The apology you felt you had deserved for weeks now. This was way more than you ever expected of him though, especially now. This was something the Zayn from a year ago would do. You remain in the boutique, every emotion in you not allowing for movement. You are stuck. Listening, yet again, to what you are sure is Zayn realizing his mistakes, and returning to his old ways, the ways that brought you together in the first place.