Don't watch me go. (Minsung)

//64//

yeah, the whole 'i don't think i should do anything' really began to tear minho down, exactly how chan called it to be.

a week went by since the whole 'kiss me' situation and minho's feelings got worse, as he expected.

every time the group came over minho's house, or every time that jisung was near him- minho would be distracted.

he would steal glances at jisung and every time he would do something cute he felt his heart melt all over again.

it was getting really tough.

if minho wasn't being eaten alive by his feelings before- now it was ten times worse.

it was like torture- and it made minho feel so bad about himself.

it sprouted so many thoughts and questions, like what was wrong with him? was there a reason why didn't jisung like him back?

what was so wrong with him that he had to suffer with feeling so alone?

the feeling of being alone became the worst it had ever been.

the whole day- minho hadn't spoken to anybody. not even to jisung.

usually everyone would be doing something, or would be trying to hang out with each other.

but not today.

minho shut off his phone, as he was at the peak of the worst.

he sat in the bathroom, sitting in the bath tub, fully clothed and resting his head on the tiled wall, as he looked up at his darkening ceiling with a much needed cigarette in his mouth.

two empty packs were on the floor, littered near him as he had one full one in his hands.

this had been going on all day.

his eyes had bags under them, as he soon found no reason to get up and sleep. he was alone.

and all that week junseo had been fucking texting jisung.

they even hung out once- making minho feel so replaced and almost heartbroken just by that.

he tied his hands with his hair.

he fucking hated this.

he hated feeling so alone.

he hated dealing with this bullshit. he hated his feelings. he never used to deal with this.

minho flicked the dead bud in his hand across the floor, watching it slid across the tile.

his black hair fell over his eyes as he pulled out another one from the box, using the old lighter to light the nicotine he craved.

he inhaled deeply, releasing the breath as his head fell back as he closed his eyes, feeling the smoke spread inside him, just before exhaling.

the cycle was back and continued.

this continued until he heard two knocks at his front door.

he rolled his eyes and ignored it, taking another long inhale through his mouth.

three more loud knocks were at his door, followed by a shout of,

"minho, you in here?" it was chan's voice. "come on just let me in i know something's up!"

minho sighed and didn't even bother to get up, sinking further down into the tub.

after a long while, he heard more knocks on the door. "come on, open the door! hyunjin is with me. we just wanna know you're okay." he heard how frustrated chan sounded.