After Forever & Ever

Chapter 42

Tessa-Present

It's happening my biggest fear is happening.

Neither myself or Zed says anything for what feels like forever.

Hardin speaks again this time in a much less calm tone.

"Are you fucking him?" He asks me.

"No!" I immediately respond.

"Hardin I'm really sorry we didn't know..." Zed says but Hardin stops him.

"Fuck you and get the fuck out." He pushes Zed. This is just as Vance is walking in.

Vance pushes Hardin away from Zed.

"What the fuck happened here and what the fuck is going on?" Vance asks Hardin.

All I can think is please Hardin don't tell Vance what I did.

I still just can't believe this is happening. I can see the heartbreak all over him and it's killing me.

"I'll clean everything up." Hardin says as he walks away and starts throwing out cups.

Vance mouths to me "did he use?"

I just shake my head no. And...At this point Zed has conveniently left.

Vance can tell something more is going on but I can tell he is not trying to press it.

I go to try and help Hardin and end up getting in his way. "Can I help? I ask.

"No...but you can leave." He says to me and that kills me.

"Hardin." I say as I try to grab his hand.

"Please Tessa just get away from me." He says to me and again it absolutely kills me.

"Okay but I'm not leaving." I tell him.

He moves past me and continues cleaning. I help even though he asked me not to.

He goes into his room and I follow... he is is just sitting on his bed so I stand in the doorway because I don't want to upset him more by getting too close.

He is surprisingly way more calm about this then I would have ever expected him to be...but I can literally feel the hurt radiating off of him.

He isn't saying anything and I realize I am going to have to explain myself.

"We have only kissed and it didn't mean anything." I finally tell him.

"Mhm." Is all he says and he looks away.

"I don't know why I did it and I'm just so sorry." I tell him as I go to sit next to him.

He stands up and leans against his dresser.

"When?" He asks.

"When what?" I say back.

"When did this happen?" He asks again.

"The night you came back..." I respond.

"That's it?" He asks.

"And the night you played the bar...." I tell him.

"Oh the night you made me feel fucking bad about being out...." he yells.

"Hardin I'm sorry." I say as tears start rolling down my face.

"You fucking hooked up with him even while I was back...told me you couldn't trust me and made me feel like I had something to prove for you to be with me." He yells even louder.

"Hardin I was confused." I tell him.

"You know...fuck you Tessa." He says and he walks out slamming his door.

I get up right away to stop him from leaving. He punches a wall in the hallway sending a hole right through it.

Vance leaves his room. And sees what Hardin just did.

"What is going on?" He asks confused.

Hardin grabs his keys off the counter. And yells back to Vance  "ask her!"

"Where are you going?" I scream.

But he doesn't answer he just walks out slamming the door behind him.

I just start balling my eyes out. Because if he does anything it's all my fault.

Vance pulls me in for a hug.

Finally when I catch my breath he asks "what happened?"

I know I have to be honest with him..."I...I made out with Zed." I tell him.

"Did you tell him or did he find out?" He asks and I tell him "He found out."

He's shakes his head knowing that's worse.

"I think we are both thinking the worst right now...but he does love you and..." I stop him.

"I don't know what he will do though. And I'm scared..." I tell Vance.

"It will be okay..."he says and I don't know if he is trying to convince himself or me.

"I hope so." I reply.

I think we both know it's going to be a long night for us...

"I'll make us some tea." Vance says.

I go have a seat on the couch. Vance joins me once the tea is ready.

I try to pull the attention away from what I did because I am ashamed of it and I have no idea how Vance thinks of me now ...so I ask him how his night with Kim went.

"Ahh could have been better..." he responds with.

"Why is that?" I ask.

"Well when Kim met me she knew I had one son...and didn't necessarily bargain for another and all that comes with Hardin has been a lot." Vance explains.

"Trust me I know." I respond.

"Every time I feel like I can catch my breath it's something new. And my biggest fear is getting the phone call that he's...that he's dead." Vance honestly says to me.

"I'm sorry Vance. I know this has all been hard on me but I never really was asking how you were and I'm just sorry." I tell him.

"Tess I'm fine. I worry about you and the baby. And well all of this...I want you both to be happy and I hope that you guys can get past this." He says.

"Me too." I reply.

I know I don't want to fall asleep until he's back but Vance insists on me getting some rest so I grab a pillow off the couch and lay my head down.

I plan on only being asleep for a little while but I wake up to sunshine. I look around Vance is in the kitchen.

"Is he back?" I ask.

He shakes his head no and puts his head down.