Hide Your Heart

The Big Decision

Paul was on pins and needles waiting for. Tommy's decision. He sincerely hoped the lead guitarist chose him instead of Jaime. He paced, he cleaned and paced more. After an hour or so of non-stop movement, Paul headed to the shower.

Tommy, who had shut himself in the bedroom, was busy writing down the pros and cons of jumping into  another relationship right away. He had more cons than pros but he was going to go with his head this time. 

Finally, after looking through the list one more time, he put the notebook aside and stood up. "Paul, I'm gonna shower. I'll be out in awhile." 

Hearing no response, Tommy shrugged and closed the bathroom door. Once in the shower, he couldn't hear Paul setting up something in the kitchen. Tommy was lost in his own thoughts until the shampoo ran into his eyes and started stinging. He had red, teary eyes as he finished. Half blind with bloodshot irises, he fumbled around to get dressed, hoping he could see soon.

In the kitchen, Paul had set up quite an array of cheeses, wines, chocolate and other enticing temptations. He was going to do everything in his power to win Tommy's heart and trust. He knew he'd have to be patient too. Sighing, Paul hoped it wouldn't go to waste. 

Tommy was still blinking when as he felt his way down the hallway. "Damn!" he swore as he bumped into the wall. He gave up and sat on the floor in frustration. 

"Tom?" called Paul, "I heard a noise. Are you okay?"

"Yes. I got shampoo in my eyes and now they hurt. I'll be fine in a bit."

"Oh, is that why you bumped into the wall?" Paul had come out of the kitchen and was squatting in front of Tommy. He lifted his head and looked at his eyes. " Let's go wash your eyes out." 

"No. I want nothing else in my eyes." 

"I'll hold a rag to them then. Don't push me away." said Paul firmly.

"Fine." sighed Tommy. He kept his eyes closed as Paul headed to get a rag. 

A few minute later, Paul gently placed the rag on Tommy's eyes. "How does that feel....sweetheart?" "Better I hope." said Paul in a low voice.

"S-s-sweetheart?" "I---I---I like the sound of that. I was never called that."

"Well, as long as you're here, you'll get used to hearing it a lot. Does it make you uncomfortable?"

"I don't know. When Gene and Eric call each other that, they usually wind up running off together to do it.  If that's all you have in mind, then please don't use the term. If you truly mean it, then I'm fine with it."

"Tommy,  I don't use the term freely. When I care for someone I use it." Waiting a beat or two, Paul added, "I'm not gonna use you for a good time and just discard you. I don't play with people's hearts like that. I love you, remember that, no matter what."

Getting up to refresh the rag, Paul held out his hand. "Come have a seat in the kitchen. I can be closer to the sink this way."

Entering the kitchen, Tommy could make out all the work Paul had put in. "I-I-is this all for me? Why? I'm nobody special."

"Yes you are." 

Paul sat down in the nearest chair and pulled Tommy into his lap. "You are very special to me. You may not see it, but you are." He ran his hands through Tommy's slightly tangled shoulder length black hair before brushing his palms down Tommy's cheek. "You are very special to me." he repeated before pulling the guitarist into a kiss.

Against Paul's lips, Tommy whispered something Paul could barely make out. Pulling his head back slightly, Paul asked," Did you say you're staying?"

"No, I said I love you and I'll be yours if you'll have me."

After blinking, Paul took Tommy's hand and kissed his knuckles. "I will".

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A few hours later, the food was finished as was the wine. Paul had moved to the couch to stretch out. Tommy was sound asleep with his head on his chest, arms around him.  Paul managed to cover them with a blanket before dozing off himself. His last thought was of contentment.