Immaculate

Talking it out

Sang's POV

I couldn't concentrate. I was tired and there was no way I could make head or tail of Geometry this late at night. Not to mention the fact that instead of problems I was seeing North's face.

I was sitting cross legged on the bed, my books spread in front of me. A scraping at the window made me look up, Luke and Nathan must be coming over. I bit my lip, I wanted to see them, but at the same time I was certain that they would pick up on something being wrong.

I watched as a black boot and then a black jean clad leg came over the window sill and I knew it was North.

I bit my lip, my finger pushing at it as I watched the rest of him appear. He slid the window shut and then just stood there, his head down, turned slightly away from me.

I stood up from the bed, balancing on my foot as I scratched the back of my leg with my other foot.

"Sang Baby," he stopped and my heart broke.

"North, I am so sorry. Please, tell me what I did wrong, what I should have done..."

He was in front of me in two strides, his hands gripping my head.

"No, you didn't do anything wrong, Sang, you were amazing. You were perfect..." he stopped and closed his eyes, a muscle worked at the side of his jaw.

"But you wouldn't talk to me.. you didn't want to look at me. I rang you and you..." His fingers were moving, wiping away tears I hadn't even realised I was crying.

"Don't cry baby, it wasn't you. It was never you," he ground out.

"But..."

"No, listen," he demanded and took a deep breath. "I want so much for you, I want to give you so much. I love you, Sang."

"North, I don't understand," I whispered. A pain lodged itself in my chest and my stomach twisted on itself.

"I should never have done that to you," he said, ripping his hands from my face and turning away from me.

I clenched my hand, my nails biting into my palms as I struggled to fight the rising flood of hysteria.

"Was.... was... did I not do it right for you?" My voice broke. I know he had already told me but I just didn't understand. What else could be wrong if it wasn't the fact that I didn't know what I was doing.

"Fuck, Sang! You were more than right, you were fucking perfect..."

I felt a sliver of anger creep through me. It made no sense. If he said it was ok, and I was ok, what was his problem?

"I don't get it, North. I don't get why you treated me as if I'd done something wrong. I wanted you to come home with me and you couldn't even look at me!" I was forcing back the tears.

He whirled around, his hands going out to the sides.

"Don't you see? I couldn't come home with you. I wanted to, fucking hell, I wanted to. But I couldn't!"

"Why?" I demanded,

"Because I'd fucking come like a twelve year old with his first Victoria Secrets catalogue! I had the fucking control of a wild animal!" he shot out. "We were in the front seat of my Jeep! I just wanted to kiss you, to hold you for a bit, it's been so fucking long since I could just be with you that I couldn't control myself!" He was angry now, his voice rising as he spoke.

"North..." I was blushing madly at his words but I was beginning to understand.

"We were in the front seat of my Jeep, Sang!" he roared and I looked at my door in panic. Marie would hear if he wasn't careful, and I didn't want her knowing about this.