Limitless (NCT one shots)

Without saying goodbye Pt2 (Norenmin)

When Jeno walks into his apartment and sees how messy and dark it is he feels a small bit of regret. He really did need space to think this through though. He sees Jaemin asleep on the couch and starts to quietly clean up the place.
He busies himself with the dishes and clearing to go containers. He can see that there were always two servings of food, one untouched and one barely eaten. He tries not to feel guilt but he knows Jaemin was suffering too. He remains quiet as he cleans so Jaemin can rest. After getting all the dishes done and the garbage cleared, he wipes the counter. He startles when he sees Jaemin leaning in the doorway with tears rolling down his cheeks.
"Hi." Jeno says softly after getting his bearings back. Jaemin's bottom lip quivers hard as he breaks down for the millionth time this week.
"I was starting to think I would never even see your face again. I didn't think I would be able to apologize to you." He falls hard to his knees, so much so that Jeno winces.
"What are you doing baby?" He goes and gets down to his level on the floor. Jaemin still can't speak, he just grabs on to Jeno like it will be his last time and cries on his shoulder.
"Shh, Shh. It's ok, I'm here, I'll always be here." Jaemin slowly looks up at him.
"I am not planning on leaving you any time soon." Jaemin smiles and buries his face in his neck.
"I'm so sorry Jen. I never wanted to hurt you." Jeno nods and pets his head.
"Why did you kiss him?" It's a simple question really, but his answer could take this in so many different directions.
"I've liked him for a long time. He said he was leaving because he loved us and couldn't be around us anymore because we hurt him too much." Jeno nods and rubs his back.
"Have your feelings for me changed at all?" Jaemin frowns.
"No, not at all. Any feelings I have for him have never affected the way I feel for you." Jeno nods again and pulls him into his chest.
"Come on, let's clean you up so we can talk more." Jeno stands and pulls Jaemin up.
"Sorry, I've let this place go a bit." He chuckles as Jaemin looks around, embarrassed.
"It's ok. We can clean it together, I'm more worried about you. Did you eat? With the amount of old food I threw out, it didn't seem like it." He stops walking and turns to him and lifts his shirt, placing his hands on his bare waist.
"You're so skinny Jaem, you need to eat, even when you are sad, ok?" Jaemin nods obediently and wraps his arms around Jeno's neck, squeezing him tightly.
"I love you Jen, so much." Jeno hums and rubs his back. He ends up lifting him off the floor and slowly walking toward the bathroom. When they get there Jeno runs a bath then helps Jaemin out of his clothes. It's a slow memorable process as he is absorbing all the beauty that Jaemin possesses. He kisses him softly and pulls him close to him, letting his hands softly roam his naked back side.
"I love you Jaemin, always." He says and Jaemin nods with more tears. He sighs and pecks his lips before escorting him into the tub.
"Will you come in please? I don't want to be apart from you." Jaemin asks softly.
"Let me go get a few things first, ok?" Jaemin nods and looks down at the bubbles in the water.
When Jeno gets back Jaemin is staring at the water blankly. He sets the towels down and starts to take his clothes off, Jaemin notices and watches his every move.
"I missed you so much." Jaemin says softly. Jeno steps into the water and sits facing him. He pulls Jaemin onto his lap.
"I missed you too baby, but I needed time to clear my head." Jaemin nods with new tears.
"I can't even imagine what that must have looked like, what you must have thought when you seen us." He chokes up again and Jeno is quick to hold him tighter.
"I was so selfish. Even though I had those feelings, in the moment I only thought of myself. I kissed him and I liked it." He stops and looks in Jeno's eyes to try and read his thoughts.
"I'm sorry. I never should have..." Jeno doesn't let him finish as he smashes their lips together. It starts out heated, almost forceful until it slows. Jaemin can feel Jeno's love in this and he really hopes he feels his too.
Jeno pulls away first.
"It's ok, it's really ok." Jeno says. Jaemin studies him and still can't figure it out.
"Why? If it's ok why did you leave me with no contact for a week? Why is it ok that I kissed someone else Jeno?" He starts to back away a little as his thoughts go to bad places.
"You didn't revenge cheat did you? Like, we only kissed and it's Renjun and we've known him forever and, shit. That makes it worse. Just please tell me there isn't someone else?" Jeno chuckles after watching him ramble on nervously.
"Can you tell me where you were this week? I was so scared that you would get hurt or not eat..." Jeno interrupts.
"You mean like you didn't eat?" He kisses his nose.
"No, I didn't cheat. I was angry at first, then sad and confused and a lot of things but not a cheater. I stayed with Mark, and him and Haechan fed me well." He kisses his lips softly.
"I'm starting to wrinkle, should we get out and talk on the couch?" Jaemin nods and lets Jeno wash him with kisses being shared between the two.
After dressing in their cozy pajamas they cuddle under a blanket on the couch.
"I cried a lot, probably about as much as you. I also did a lot of thinking. There are things I've never told you that I need to get out in the open too. I've not been completely honest with you either." Jaemin frowns but nods his head silently to show he has his full attention.
"I talked to Renjun before I came here." Jaemin perks up a bit.
"He hates me." He whispers. Jeno strokes his cheek.
"He doesn't hate you, he was angry and sad and I'm sure he felt like you put him in an awkward situation but he's better now, I think." He hugs Jaemin softly.
"I told him, well I made him promise not to leave school. We all need to talk.
Jaemin, I told him how when I saw you guys it scared me because you looked so comfortable together, like it wasn't the first time. I was coming to surprise you with an amusement park date, just for fun. The way you both held each other, it was like it was familiar you know?" Jaemin shakes his head, much like Renjun did.
"No, he is familiar because we've known him forever but not in that way, I swear it was our first time." Jeno nods and smiles softly.
"I know that now. I also know it hurt like hell." Jaemin winces.
"But if it wouldn't have happened things would have never changed and we would always be stuck in this endless loop of secrets and pain." Now Jaemin can't hide the confusion.
"Jaemin when I talked to him tonight, I told him how I loved him too and I kissed him." Jeno waits and lets it sink in.
"Wait, you are in love with him? But what about me?" Jeno smiles and pulls him on his lap and snuggles into his neck.
"Just like, you. I love you and Renjun. I've known since before we started dating that I had feelings but I didn't think it was right and I was too young and naive to know that I could date you both. I wasn't mature enough to even have a conversation like this and I of course didn't know how either of you felt, so I just went with it. I love you, more than I did back then but I also feel those feelings for him and I feel awful that he's been hurting all this time." Jaemin is still stunned as he sits and stares at the floor. Jeno is leaving soft kisses on his neck as he absorbs all the information.
After a few minutes he gets off Jeno's lap and sits cross legged in front of him so they can look in each other's eyes.
"So if you and I love him and he loves us, what do we do about this?" Jeno smiles softly at his cute boyfriend.
"Well, if you want to we will ask him to be our boyfriend too, and if he says yes then we live happily ever after. If he says no then we will win him over and beg for forgiveness." Jaemin giggles happily. His smile stretching his face. Jeno's eyes are showing his happiness as his smile stretches across his face too.
"You make me so happy Jen, I love you so much."
"I love you too baby."
The next morning they nervously walk to Renjun's dorm. They knock softly and hold their breaths when they hear the footsteps.
"Oh, hey Chenle. Where is Renjun? We need to talk to him." Chenle looks down sadly and walks to the counter where he picks up a piece of paper.

Dear Chenle,
I'm sorry to do this so suddenly but I need to get away and I don't want to be found. Please tell everyone that I love them and I'm sorry. I will contact you when I can. For now good bye.
           Love Renjun
P.s.
I'm getting a new number.