The Third Journal

Pages 253+254

DIPPER'S JOURNAL

The true theory of
WEIRDNESS

I told Ford that I'd spent my young adulthood obsessed with this question. Bill Cipher told me that the weirdness in town leaked in from another dimension- but this was a lie. Bill was simply trying to trick me into opening a door so he could claim Gravity Falls for himself.

The truth, I explained, was a bit stranger. To help Ford understand, I borrowed Mabel's car, and we drove until we reached the town boarder of Gravity Falls. I took the bag of jellybeans he had brought and began to explain.

Everything in the universe is like a jelly bean- made of the same basic materials, varied in color and flavor, but all more or less conforming to an expected patteren. But every now and then, by chance, a bean comes out deformed... odd... weird. He handed me an especially strange bean from his collection, and then I dropped it and the bag at my feet.

The beans began to tumble downhill, but one bean, the deformed one, almost magically rolled backwards, UP the hill, right UP TO THE TOWN BORDER.

Ford's eyes widened. I could see him beginning to understand. Why had this one bean rolled uphill?

-----

The reason? Gravity Falls is a...

WEIRDNESS MAGNET!

Oddness is strangely, mysteriously drawn to this place, from misshapen jelly beans, to gnomes and fairies to dinosaurs, interdimensional tears, clones, crazy ex-presidents, even transgender men with strange birthmarks and boys with six fingers. I explained that I felt in my bones that my arrival at this town, and perhaps Stanford's, too, was not an accident. That we were part of some greater fate the town had in store for us. "We're some of the strangest beans this town has seen, aren't we, Great Uncle Dipper?" He asked.

"Mason," I blurted out. I was shocked by what had come out of my mouth, and then deliberately repeated it. "My birth name is Mason. I never really told anyone that. Dipper was just a nickname and it stuck. Don't tell anyone."

He smiled at me. "Don't worry, I won't." He said. "It would be mean for me to tell someone your dead name. That's what Bella says. And the Masons are a great secret society." I smiled. I realized how much he trusted me, and I him- and what a shame it was that he was leaving at the end of the summer. I have begun to form an idea...

.....

FORD'S JOURNAL

It seems that since the Author arrived, everyday in Gravity Falls has been the best! Today Great Uncle Dipper sent Bella on a quest for unicorn hair, and Stan and Fiddleford came along with her, leaving Dipper and me to try and "Bill-proof" my mind.

THE MIND READER

It didn't turn out too well. He ended up falling asleep after a few hours and I used the machine to try and see his thoughts. Apparently he used to be friends with Bill- and I thought he was STILL on Bill's side.

That was really dumb.... I freaked out and tried shooting Dipper with Chiu's memory gun. Thankfully, the metal plate in his head made it so that his memory wasn't erased.

-----

Afterwards Dipper sat me down and told me to ask any question about the town I wanted. So of course, I asked why Gravity Falls is so weird. He drove me out to the town boarder after telling me to bring a bag of jelly beans and one bean from my collection of deformed jelly beans.

He explained how everything was like jelly beans and poured the bag and the deformed bean down the hill. The deformed bean ended up rolling BACK UP the hill!

He said it was because Gravity Falls is a weirdness magnet. That it drew both of us and everything else here. "We're some of the strangest beans this town has seen, huh Great Uncle Dipper?" I asked.

He told me his dead name (Mason) then, and he seemed shocked that he dead. He told me not to tell anyone, and I assured him that I wouldn't.

He really trusted me enough to tell me that! It's a shame I have to go home at the end of the summer....