Andy Biersack imagines

60. Save me

A/N: I've been really sad and depressed lately (like more than usual) so I wrote this to see if it would help at all and it did a little. Also, sorry for scaring some of you a few days ago.. I was in a really bad place and didn't know what to do, but once again Chloe came over and saved my life. Im trying to get better though.
-Andy
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—Andy's POV—

Once I got home from school, I couldn't hold my tears in any longer. I ran into my room and slammed the door shut, leaning against the wall for support.

I fell to the ground on my knees facing the wall, unable to hold myself up any longer. I rested my forehead against the wall and wrapped my arms around my stomach as loud, heaving sobs shook my body and hot tears ran down my face. I screamed once before crying even harder.

I was glad that Chloe wasn't here to see me like this, despite the calming effect her presence has on me.  Somehow just feeling her presence when she walks into the house is enough to calm me down. I could be crying inconsolably for hours, unable to stop the tears no matter what I do, but the second she walks in I immediately feel a sense of comfort and I'm able to calm down before she even notices I was crying.

Though part of me was glad she wasn't here right now, the other part of me knew I needed her to come be with me and hold me. I knew that I wasn't gonna be able to calm down for quite a while; I was in so much pain and so emotionally and mentally exhausted that all I could do was sit on the floor and cry as hard as my body would allow me to.

There was no way I would be able to calm myself down this time. I knew I needed someone to be with me, so I texted Chloe to come over. She's the only person I've ever let see me cry before, and I know I can trust her with everything and anything. I texted her and the message said:

"Can you come over? My mind is a mess right now and I can't stop crying. Can you please come? I need you"

A few minutes later, she responded by saying:

"I'm on my way right now sweetie. I'll see you in a few. Hang in there, love. Do you need anything else before I get there?"

"No but please hurry. I just really need to be with you and I could really use a hug right now" I said back.

"Don't worry love. I'll be there soon and I'll give you as many hugs as you want. I love you."

I stayed on the floor crying my eyes out for about 5 or 10 more minutes before I felt someone sit down next to me so that they were facing me. Before I could look up to see who it was (even though I pretty much knew it was Chloe), I felt myself being pulled closer to them so that my head was resting on their shoulder. They held me tightly and whispered calming things to me.

By now I knew for sure that it was Chloe. I gripped onto her tightly and cried even harder. I was sobbing so hard that I couldn't breathe. I tried to scream again but no sound came out, only sharp gasps and hiccups and heavy sobs.

Chloe picked me up and moved me so that I was sitting on her lap. She wrapped both of her arms around me and hugged me tighter. I curled up to her as close as I could, needing as much comfort as possible.

I hid my face in her shoulder while continuing to cry and sob my heart out. I could feel my body shaking and shuddering as I sobbed, and she rubbed my back and stroked my hair while still whispering soothing words to try and calm me down.

I was surprised she was actually staying with me and holding me while I cried this hard. I've never cried so hard in my life. I was a mess and having the worst breakdown I've ever had, but somehow she still stayed with me and held me.

"H-how are y-you still h-hold-ing m-me?" I said as I sobbed into her shoulder. I was still crying pretty hard, but I had calmed down enough to speak.

"Honey, do you really think I'd leave you while you're like this?" She asked softly.

"I don't care how upset you are. I'm not leaving you. You can scream as loud as you want, and cry as much as you need to. I'll always be here to hold you." she whispered and she kissed my head.

I still couldn't calm down, so she slowly started rocking me back and forth while still holding me tightly.

After about 10 more minutes of crying as hard as I was, I had to force myself to stop crying so I could catch my breath. It took everything I had in me, but somehow I managed to stop sobbing so hard. After I had stopped crying, I let go of Chloe slightly so I could wipe the tears off my face.

"Do you think you can tell me what happened?" Chloe asked me carefully as she brushed my hair out of my face and kissed my forehead.

I tried to explain what had happened, but before I could get any words out, the pain and sadness hit me again but even stronger this time, causing me to break down again. I clasped my hands over my mouth in an attempt to quiet my sobs, but it was no use. I was crying even worse than I was before and I felt as if my heart had jumped out of my chest and shattered on the ground, and like my chest was being stabbed over and over again.

Chloe took my hands away from my face
and pulled me back into her arms. I gripped onto the back of her shirt, screaming and sobbing my heart out into her chest. She placed one hand on the back of my head and rubbed my back with her other.

"Shh it's okay sweetie. I'll help you through this. It'll all be okay honey, I promise" she whispered as she kissed my head and hugged me tighter.

"I don't wanna be like this anymore" I said as I cried even harder.

"I know sweetheart, I know.. you'll feel better soon, honey. I promise" she whispered as she kissed my head.

I started to calm down and after a few minutes I had finally stopped crying. Once I stopped crying, Chloe pulled away slightly and wiped my tears with her hoodie sleeve.

"Do you want to go lay down for a while?" She asked as she kissed my forehead again.

I nodded and we both stood up and walked over to the bed. We both crawled into bed under the covers and cuddled up with each other.

I curled up as close to her as I could be and hid my face in her shoulder, holding onto her as tight as I could. She held me tightly and lightly ran her fingers through my hair to keep me calm. The two of us ended up falling asleep for the rest of the day and night.

Once again, Chloe saved my life.