Relentless

46

As I walked over I felt my heart beating out of my chest. I didn't want to hear the news, I just wanted to live in the ignorant bliss that we was alive.

"Woah, only family." The nurse said and shook her head, "he's my dad." I said and raised my hand as the other three had to walk away. "Please..." I begged her as I picked at my nails anxiously. "Please tell me he's alive..." I whispered as she looked at me with sad eyes.

"He's alive. We got his heart started again, but he's not out of the woods yet, we are pumping electrolytes into him to strengthen him up. He's a fighter." She said as I breathed in a sigh of relief. "Trust me, I know." I whispered and raked my hand through my hair.

"When can I see him?" I asked as she smiled sympathetically, "you can come back right now." She said as I nodded, "w-what are the chances of survival?" I asked timidly as she sighed, "honestly 50/50. It's a tough situation." She said as I nodded slowly.

"Okay..thank you." I said then turned back to the others. Colby looked at me cautiously as Michelle cried into Stephanie's shoulder,

"He's alive." I said quietly and walked to Colby, wrapping my arms around him and Mia. "He's strong baby." He mumbled into my hair as he pressed a kiss on my head. "Let's go see him." I said and leaned away from him.

He took my hand in his and led the way back to the room. Mia fussed in Colby's arms as we walked back into the room.

Dad looked the same as before, but his heart monitor was steadily beeping which sent relief through my body.

"Come here sweet girl." I mumbled and took Mia from Colby, "did you feed her?" I asked him as she leaned her head on my chest. "Yeah, just a little bit of peas, she might still be hungry." He said as I looked down at her,

"Mia, food?" I asked as she reached for my dad, "papa." She said as I shook my head, "no, papa is sleeping..." I whispered and rubbed her back. "Papa" she said as I looked at Colby helplessly, "no sweetie, papa has to sleep, he's super tired." He said and ran his fingers though her hair.

She sighed and rested her head on my chest as I took a deep breath, feeling the exhaustion hitting me.

"You can sleep baby girl, I'll wake you up if anything changes." Colby said as I breathed out a laugh, "you know me well enough to know that's not going to happen." I said as he chuckled, "yeah, I know. I just have to offer." He said as I rested my head on his chest. "You can sleep though. I'll be okay." I said as he shook his head.

"You know me well enough to know that's not going to happen." He said as I nodded. "We really are stubborn aren't we?" I asked as he nodded, "the most stubborn." He said as Mia fussed in my arms, "she's getting fussy.." I breathed out and bounced her on my knees.

"Maybe we can take her for a walk..are you hungry?" Colby asked as I stood up to bounce her, "yeah, but I don't know if I'll be able to keep anything down..I feel sick." I said as he stood up to take my hand, "I know sweetheart, but maybe eating will help." He said and rubbed my hand with his thumb.

"Okay...yeah." I whispered then turned to Michelle and Stephanie, "we will be right back. Do you want any food or anything?" I asked as Michelle shook her head,

"do you mind getting me a water bottle...I'll pay for it..." Stephanie said as I nodded and smiled sympathetically, "don't worry about it, we will get you a water bottle." I said as Colby tightened his grip on my hand. "Come on." I said to him and bounced Mia on my hip.

As soon as we were out of the room Colby stopped to look at me, "what's up?" I asked him has he looked at me with confusion, "why are you being so nice to Stephanie?" He asked as I shook my head slowly,
"Because she's losing someone too, Colby...my dad is her only father figure. He's been there when she needed him..she's losing a dad too." I said simply and started walking.

"She hurt you, Cor...do you not remember?" He asked as I shook my head, "I remember not remembering anything, yes. I also know that she's been struggling though...maybe it's time we forgive her." I said as he breathed out a laugh, "what?" I asked as he shook his head.

"You're amazing....like...I don't understand how you're so strong. I don't understand how after everything you can still have such a big heart, it doesn't make sense." He said with amazement as Mia smacked my chest playfully.

"Life is too short to hold grudges, Colby. She's apologized, she's getting help...she's losing someone too." I repeated and looked straight as we made our way to the cafeteria.

"Nobody is losing anyone Cor, he's gonna wake up." He said softly as I stifled the tears that were rapidly coming. "You don't know that." I whispered and. shook my head as I turned towards the vending machine with the water bottles in it.

"Mia, do you want to walk with daddy to go get mommy a sandwhich?" I asked and set her on her feet as I turned to Colby.

"I'll get the water bottle, you get the food, I'll meet you over there...I just need a second by myself." I said as he looked at me with sad eyes, but leaned down and took Mia's hand, "I'll be right over there, whenever you're ready." He said then turned to take Mia to the food part of the cafeteria.

As soon as he was far away enough I slammed my head into the vending machine, finally letting the tears fall. I was trying so hard to believe we wasn't going to die but the voice in the back of my head was telling me this was it.

He wasn't going to make it.

He would leave me like everyone else in my life.

I sobbed for a minute before I shakily put the dollar bill I was holding in the vending machine.

I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket as I leaned down to grab the water bottle, "hey Kat." I whispered into the phone, "hey Cor, how are things going?" She asked quietly as I wiped my wet cheeks.

"H-he's alive right now...I just don't know for how long Kat...w-we said our goodbyes..t-then his heart stopped. He died in front of me Kat...h-he died right in front of my eyes." I said and leaned against the wall next to the vending machine, begging myself to breathe.

"Oh Cor...it's gonna be okay..h-he's alive right now. He's gonna push through this, I know he will." She said with a thick voice on the other side. "I hope so, god I hope so....I want him to see Mia grow up...I want him to grow old with Michelle and be happy. H-he didn't get a happy ending with m-my mom...he deserves a happy ending." I whispered and felt my heart pulsing with pain.

"I know Cora...I know, but you gotta stay strong for him, we are all standing behind you, holding you up. He's obviously not going out without a fight, so just try to stay positive." She said as I saw Colby paying for the food. "Thank you Kat, I really appreciate you. I have to go though...I'll..I'll keep you updated." I said and wiped my cheeks again.

"Love you Cora, we are all sending you hugs, I hope you feel them." She said as chuckled, "I feel them..I really do." I said with a laugh as I walked over to Colby, "okay, love you..bye." I said then hung up and looked at him.

"Who was that?" Colby asked and lifted Mia up as I grabbed the food from him. "It was Kat. I was just updating her." I said as he laced his fingers through mine.

We slowly made our way back up to the room as Mia started falling asleep in Colby's arms again. I was honestly scared every time we walked to his room. I was always scared the news would be different, that he would take a turn for the worst. Luckily things were the same this time. He was still alive.

"Here's your water bottle." I said and handed it to Stephanie with a small smile then walked to my dad.

"Hey daddy, it's your little squirt. I know you can hear me and I just want to say thank you for fighting. I love you, we are all here so when you decide to wake up. Mia's even here, she keeps reaching for you, so you better wake up to be able to hold her. She misses you." I said and took his hand.

I couldn't help the tears that fell from my eyes as I pulled his hand to my lips. "I love you daddy." I whispered and closed my eyes.

After a few seconds I felt Colby put his hand on my back, as he rubbed little circles onto it. "Wake up....please wake up." I begged as I choked out another sob.

Then I felt it.

Dad's hand, tightening around mine.