Relentless

64

"Cora, can you come downstairs?" Colby called as I got up, groaning as I struggled to stand. I was about 8 months pregnant, making standing very difficult.

"What's up?" I called out as I walked down the stairs. Colby and Mia were in the kitchen baking brownies for her birthday celebration they were having for her at school. I couldn't believe she was already in elementary school.

"Mommy will you help me and daddy?" Mia asked as I smile sympathetically at her, "is daddy bad at baking?" I asked as she nodded, "really bad." She said as I laughed, "okay sweetie, yeah. Let me wash my hands." I said and scrunched my nose at Colby.

"You really think I'm bad at baking?" Colby asked Mia as she giggled, "yeah daddy you stink." She said as he chuckled, "oh yeah? Come here you little booger." He said and lunged for her, wrapping his arms around her waist as he spun her around. Her giggles filled the air with joy as I finished washing my hands.

I was genuinely happy.

"Cora! I swear to god open your eyes!" Colby's frantic voice broke through as the dream faded away. I didn't want to wake up yet, I wanted to go back. I wanted to keep dreaming.

"Please, baby please." He begged as he brushed my hair down. I groaned as I brought my hand to my eyes. "Cora! Oh god, please baby just open your eyes for me, I wanna see your eyes." He begged, brushing my hair from my face.

I didn't want to open my eyes.

I wanted to go back to that dream.

"Cora!" He yelled and gently smacked my cheek.

Jesus! Couldn't he just let me sleep for a damn minute!?

I groaned and let my eyes crack open against the harsh lights of the sun coming into the bathroom, "oh thank god. Baby, tell me how many you took." He said and brushed my hair from my forehead, "w-what?" I asked and shook my head, "how many pills did you take? You need to throw them up. Now." He demanded as I shook my head.

"I didn't take any, Colby." I mumbled and shook my head, "Cora, don't lie to me! I swear to God how many did you fucking take?!" He yelled, putting both his hands on the side of my face, "I didn't take any." I repeated, making sure to look into his eyes so he could see I was telling the truth. "I had a seizure." I whispered as his face dropped.

"Oh god..." he whispered and collected me into his arms as I wrapped my arms loosely around him. "I didn't take my medicine." I admitted as he rubbed my hair down gently, "why not? That's probably why you had a seizure! That's so dangerous, Cor." He said and looked into my eyes as the tears started forming.

"I don't want to be numb." I whispered as he let out a breath. Sadness filled his eyes as he watched me carefully, studying my face. "I know honey, but...it has to happen." He whispered and wiped my cheeks as I started to sob.

I didn't realize I would have a reaction like that to not taking my pill, which only made all of this worse. I didn't want to be numb but I didn't want to have another seizure. I didn't want to go down that road again.

He wrapped his arms tightly around me as I sobbed into his shoulder, feeling the dark cloud raging above me again.

We sat like that for a few minutes before I pulled away and reached for the pill bottle that still had a few of the pills in it. "Wait...you're sure you didn't take any?" Colby asked and stopped my hand from bringing the small white pill to my mouth.

"I'm sure, Colby...I'm sure." I said as he nodded and let go so I could take the pill. Once it was down I leaned my head on Colby's chest feeling my heart break that I would be feeling numb again soon.