A Tale of Mischief and Mutants

About The Bridge

—-Loki—-

I'm barely awake when I hear the door open. I look over groggily it's easier to move today and I don't feel as warm. I'm confused by who I see in the room with me.

"...Sif?"

She stops dead in her tracks she's currently over near the table with the gifts on it somethings in her hand... was she taking one of them? ...No, no she was leaving something though I can't make out exactly what in the dim light of the room, she purposely didn't turn the light on when she came in.

I know that because though I can see well enough to make out the room there's just barely enough light for me to do so. This means she's unable to see properly at all. She was hoping by keeping the light off I'd stay asleep. She sighs turning away from the table towards me.

"Loki..."

"Why are you here?"

"Thor wanted me to be."

She's lying Thor wouldn't have pressured her into this. I glare at her making my disbelief clear and somehow in the dark room it seems she's able to feel it. She reluctantly sets her gift on the table looking defeated.

"I had hoped you'd be asleep. Though part of me knows we need to talk."

"What's there to talk about?"

She had rejected all of my attempts to reach out over the years until it was clear I had burned that bridge irreparably. I used to think she was the closest one of Thor's friends to being my friend. She was only ever cruel towards me when goaded into it through peer pressure or when I had done something cruel to her like cutting her hair or painting over her armor with pink paint.

I used to do such things to seek attention because I was lonely, negative attention was better than no attention at all. She bites her lip for a moment looking unsure of what she's about to say.

"...the bridge, you letting go, ...I feel partially responsible."

'What?' 'Why?' Sif had been the kindest of Thor's friends to me. My confusion must be apparent due to my silence because she begins to explain.

"Loki I was supposed to be your friend yet for centuries I stood by silently when the others tormented you and on occasion did so myself so when you found out about... about what you were, you felt like you had nowhere to go, that you couldn't tell anyone and I'm sorry. If I hadn't been so passive maybe things could've turned out differently for you."

I hadn't really ever blamed Sif, she only really began to vex me after my anger at Thor and my father took hold.

"Sif... I never blamed you. You were the best of them. ...I'm sorry I let you down."

She looks to the floor guiltily.

"I should have known something was wrong when we returned from Jotunheim."

"I hid it."

She looks up at me still looking guilty.

"I still should have known, you seemed shaken I thought it was because of Thor's banishment but... I ignored it. Even if that's all it had been I should have spoken with you."

"Sif I don't blame you. ...I blame myself."

"You're not the only one guilty, we all failed you. You were completely alone, and Loki though at times you did things that drove me mad, you never deserved to be."

I realize what she said to me on an occasion when I had cut her hair stuck with her, that she believes it may have contributed to my decision to let go. I was rightfully deserving of a scolding and of receiving a few hits as I would be just as angry if someone were to cut my hair but her words did sting. She told me I deserved to be alone and I always would be.

It hurt but I attributed it to saying something she didn't mean in the heat of the moment and since she was kind to me after that instance I got over it. I couldn't very well hold a grudge against one of the only people who acknowledged my existence outside of the context of criticizing me or reprimanding me. She shouldn't feel so guilty, she's not the reason I let go that day. I try my best to stop her from continuing that train of thought.

"I've moved past that, Thor and I well you see us, we're alright now..."

I wish I could say the same about her. She looks to me almost pleadingly.

"Could we try that... being alright?"

I smile slightly.

"If you'd be willing to."

She nods looking relieved.

"I would be."

She smiles.

"I promised Val I'd be home soon, so... farewell."

"Farewell Sif."

She stops before she walks through the door.

"Feel better soon my friend."

I'm glad her back is turned towards me because this brings a tear to my eye.

"I will."

She nods and is on her way. Though I'm not exactly supposed to be up and walking around I ignore the doctors orders for a moment and get up curious to see what she left. I justify this action by asking myself what kind of god of Mischief I would be if I didn't ignore the rules at least once. Besides I'm feeling much better today and I don't have any serious trouble moving a short distance. I can't help but let my tears fall as I see what it she's left. On the table sits my mother's short sword with a note stuck to it.

-'Found this while going through old supplies from our evacuation I thought you should have it. She would've wanted you to. -Sif'-

I take it holding it gingerly in my hands as I look it over, I thought this had been lost along with Asgard. I spend a little while just admiring the designs in the sword's hilt and reminiscing about my mother before my legs get tired. I set the sword back down and I go back to bed.