A Tale of Mischief and Mutants

Opening up

—-Loki—-

We spent today by me giving Sam a tour of Tønsberg. I took her to the beach, to the cliff side my father passed away on, and by her request to Thor's house to see Mjölnir. My brother hardly uses his beloved weapon anymore because of the advantages Stormbreaker has over Mjölnir.

We went to Niðavellir to forge Stormbreaker when it was clear that a stronger weapon than Mjölnir would be needed to defeat Hela. It was in vain though as Stormbreaker couldn't even bring her down we had to cause Ragnarok to defeat her.

Now Mjölnir sits around in Thor's house mostly unused. He keeps it for sentimental reasons but honestly I think he's been waiting for someone worthy enough to wield it to pass it on to. Sam looks at Mjölnir hanging casually on its hook in wonder.

"You wanna give her a try?"

Thor asks Sam and Sam seems to think it over then shakes her head. I don't blame her I'd rather not be living with the hammer's rejection. If I could do it again I wouldn't have tried to lift the thing. It only put the nail in the coffin of my feelings of inadequacy. We talk for a bit mostly about missions then me and Sam leave. The sun is setting as we head home. Sam yawns.

"I guess we should head to bed."

It's early but we both also woke up extremely early. I nod. We get ready for bed and turn in for the night.

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It's hot, too hot my body can't handle it. I try to move, to get away, but that only seems to make the temperature go up then I hear a voice- it's him.

"Why do you struggle Jotun? When you know your compliance is inevitable?"

I can't breathe my lungs are burning from the heat. My vision is blurry I can see a tall bulky figure moving towards me carrying a rod glowing with heat from the fire from which it was pulled. I want to scream but don't have the breath to do so, all I feel in this moment is a gut wrenching fear. Suddenly the Titan has taken hold of my hands I struggle against him and draw a dagger I suddenly hear a female voice.

"Loki it's ok, everything's ok."

Everything seems to fade away the heat is gone, the Titan is gone, I'm in my home. And the girl...

"...Sam?"

"Yes it's ok. You're safe."

I take notice of what my hands are doing I'm holding a dagger to her throat I quickly drop it and it falls harmlessly to the floor.

"I'm sorry."

This is the second time I've almost killed her because of one of my nightmares I'm lucky it hasn't been more with the amount of times I've woken up from one when sleeping beside her. Somehow it seems her presence was enough to stop the worst of my fears when waking up even if subconsciously. I don't realize that I'm crying until I feel the tears rolling down my face and neck. Sam puts her hand on my cheek and wipes some of the tears away she moves my head so I'm looking at her.

"Who hurt you?"

Sam is deadly serious. I'm not getting out of this and she deserves an answer. As hard as it is I tell her everything some are details about things that though their public knowledge I've never fully opened up about them to anyone. Everything just comes spilling out at my realization that Sam is probably one of the only people I've gotten close to that could actually understand what I went through because she's also been through the unimaginable.

I also tell her about how I killed my biological father to try to appease my adopted father (though I left out the fact that I come from a race of monsters I just can't bring myself to tell her that yet) and how I let go of gungnir on the bridge before I go into detail about my torture on the planet Titan, Sanctuary, and aboard Sanctuary II, and how my ambitions and emotions were manipulated by the Mind Stone during 2012 filling me with anger, hate, and confusion heightening my already broken emotions. Using them for his own purposes.

I tell her about what Thanos did to me in graphic detail realizing it's weighed on me heavily, never having spoken about it in any amount of detail to anyone but Thor. When I'm done and she's basically holding me I catch my breath and I ask her knowing her experience is likely heavily weighing on her too.

"What about you? What happened to you?"

She seems to be taken aback.

"Are you sure you want to know?"

I nod I want to know everything. She shouldn't carry it alone. Sam starts in an odd place as well starting with New York when she was kicked out of her home at a young age because of her mutant abilities, she tells me about the X-men who she sees as her family, and finally she shares with me almost every sickening detail about her time in captivity. She breaks down during this and stops for several minutes at a time.

I tell her she doesn't have to continue if it's too much but she persists and tells me everything. Hearing what they did to her makes my blood boil. She wasn't seen as a person or even a pet, people typically don't abuse their pets on a regular basis. Her position was worse than that of a slave, she wasn't even allotted the few rights humanity set aside for slaves back when slavery was still widely practiced on Midgard.

No, she was seen as a thing, a toy, something to be used however they saw fit. Hearing all of this causes me to hold her closer, while I thank the Norns she's no longer in that situation a bitter part of me questions how they could allow that at all. When she's done although we're both a mess, it feels as if a huge weight has been lifted away from both of us. We lie there in silence just holding each other. Though the sun has risen at this point, we both go back to sleep. I guess we're staying in for the day.