Forever - Christian Yelich

Chivalry Isn't Dead Just Yet.

Brooklyn~

"Mom said she would take him tonight so we can go out tonight," Christian says coming into Kayden's room while I unpack some of his stuff. 

I look over at him, "Didn't know we were going out."

"She kind of suggested it. So, we're going to drop him off at 6 and then go to dinner."

"Okay. I'll be ready. I assume he's staying the night?"

"Yeah, she's thrilled to have him overnight. Only us tonight." 

I raise my eyebrows, "Okay, where are we going?"

"Just dress nice. You can find out when we get there." 

I throw my head back, "You know I'm impatient."

"Yes, you are. It's already 4:30 so if that means anything to you, just know 6 is coming up."

"Okay, I'm almost done in here."

What the hell am I going to wear? I'm nowhere near my pre-baby body, so that limits a lot of options if I want to feel good. I walk into our closet and look at some options. I really wish he would just tell me so I don't overdress. I'm thinking way too much about this. I finger through the few dresses that I have here and pull out this silky red dress that Christian just loves on me. 

I quickly curl my hair and put some light makeup on. I throw the dress on and reach behind me to zip it up but quickly replaced by Christian zipping the rest of the way up my back. "Oh, we're bringing this one out?"

I turn around to face him, "Well, you give me no direction except for 'look nice.' And this can be your actual birthday dinner, instead of the takeout we did in Milwaukee." 

"I'm going to go get him ready then we can leave."

"I'm almost done."

"Mom thanks for watching him tonight," Christian says handing over the overnight bag. "You both need it. I'm happy to have him overnight. He probably wants to spend the night with his Grandma too."

"Oh, I'm sure. Thank you again. We'll be back in the morning."

"Have fun!" 

Christian runs over to my side of the car and opens the door for me, making me shake my head and silently laugh. "Chivalry isn't dead just yet, baby." He kisses my cheek before walking back over to the driver's side. He reaches over and sets his hand on my thigh, "We're going to our favorite place."

"Really? You got us in on a Friday night?"

"Yeah, I called earlier in the day." This night just got even better. We did need this, more than I thought. 

"For Yelich," Christian tells the host at the front of the restaurant. They take us back right away into a smaller dining area, wine already in our glasses, and menus on our table. We sit down and both order since we don't stray away from our normal food choices. "You're doing all this for one night."

"One night we both needed. And you kind of turned it into a late birthday dinner. It was long overdue. You know we have no baby tonight, no reason to really be home right now. So, why not?"

"I appreciate it." I swirl my glass of wine around after taking a sip, "You missed that didn't you?"

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for the day I can have a taste of alcohol again." 

He chuckles, "This is almost weird to me. Last time we were here, kids and babies weren't even on our radar."

"It's crazy how life tends to move so fast. I don't know if it wasn't so much on our radar, I think maybe it was a let's just see what happens. It's been one hell of a year, probably the best so far, ever. Between getting married and having Kayden, it's been pretty eventful, to say the least."

"All amazing events that I could and would never replace."

"I 1000% agree."

"You know what we haven't done in a while?" Christian asks as I sit on the counter, drinking a small glass of wine. 

"What haven't we done?" I ask him curiously.

He pulls out his phone and scrolls through his phone. Soft music starts to play from his phone as he sets it down and helps me off the counter. I realize it's our first dance song that we played at the reception. I wrap my arms around his neck and he pulls me closer to him. We sway with each other in the kitchen as the song continues to play. I think we both know where this is going to lead. 

He leans down and wraps his arms under my butt and lifts me up. We are all over each other by the time he makes it to our room. He lays me down on the bed and moves his hands up and down the sides of my body. 

"Are you sure we're okay to keep going?" he asks me as we're both a little out of breath.

"I wouldn't have let it get this far if we weren't," I say before kissing him once more, "It's been seven weeks. I'm cleared and Kayden's with your mom. We are okay to keep going."

"Just making sure." He peels off his shirt before reaching behind me to the zipper and slowly pulls it down. The dress starts to fall off my shoulder and I start to feel so insecure. Brush it off, you're fine. He still loves you just as much. I try not to let it get to my head as we continue. I think he can tell I'm not all there right now. 

"Hey, we don't have to if you aren't ready."

"No, it's not that. I'm just in my head right now about all this," I say motioning to my once pretty flat stomach pre-baby.

"Pre-baby or post-baby you're just as beautiful as the day I met you. You homed him for 10 months. I don't expect you to be in the best shape of your life not even two months after having Kayden. This is already more than enough. You're beautiful and I love you." He is way too damn good to me. 

He presses his lips down to mine before starting to move down my body. He pulls the rest of my dress off of me and continues to kiss down my body. It feels like he has kissed every inch of my skin. Wow, I've missed this. 

I can't tell if he's deciding whether or not I'm enjoying this or not. I mean at least right now it's not as enjoyable as it once was. I'm sure it's just me right now. He's damn good at what he does, but now, post-baby, it's not nearly as enjoyable, for now. God, get out of your head and just try to enjoy this. He gradually speeds up, okay, that's a little better. I pull his face into mine kissing him so I can distract me and possibly him as we continue. From what I've heard, it's normal since I'm breastfeeding but the only thing I want is this to be just the littlest bit more enjoyable.

"I'm sorry," I say after Christian finishes and rolls to the side of me. "Why?" he asks as he pulls the covers over us. 

"Because I'm just in my head and down there is just all weird. I don't know, I'm just thinking way too much about this now."

He puts his hand around my waist, "Babe, it's okay, you don't have to apologize. I didn't expect this to be how it was a year ago. Our lives are crazy right now. We're not getting as much sleep as we used to. We're figuring out how to parent and keep up with an infant. We just got back to a semi-normal offseason. I still love you just as much as the day I met you, probably even more now. Everything will return to its 'normal' self in the future."

Yep, don't deserve him at all. "I love you," I say quietly and plant a small kiss on his lips. 

"I love you. Don't ever forget that or even think that I don't, because trust me, I do."

"Okay," I say quietly and move to lay on his chest a bit. He rubs my back and pretty much puts me to sleep, like always. He kisses the top of my head as I become even more drowsy than I already am. I have so much love for him, so much love.