Ellie Dixon

Hope

 What was life worth without my family?  The question echoed through my head.

The walker growls from James got louder.

My mum. Carol, the woman who took me in as her own and loved me, not the woman who gave birth to me. I never found out why mum left the prison, why she left her family, but she did... And that stung. She knew she was leaving behind her two daughters, as well as Lizzie and Mika after telling their father she'd take care of them. I'd never find out why she left if I died.

He crawled closer with a hungry look in his eyes.

My dad. Growing up, he hadn't been the best father the world had to offer... But he wasn't the worst. I knew he loved me, especially when he risked everything to save me over and over. He took in Sophia and Jacob, even though Jacob was dead. Jacob wasn't his, but even after he found me and Sophia, he went out there every day to find him. My dad was a good man. I didn't know if he was dead, he could be alive. But, if I died I would definitely never see him again.

The walker's hand grabbed my wrist.

Sophia. My sister. She trusted me to take care of her and I let her down. I couldn't save her from the rapid currents. She'd been failed by Ed, her twin brother, her mother... Now me. She was always there for me, made me smile when nobody else could. She was the reason I kept living. What if she's alive? There was a chance she survived that fall and the water... I was abandoning her if I gave up. I didn't wanna be like the people who'd let us down in the past. I'd never find her if I died.

I grabbed my pocketknife, pulled the walker closer before stabbing it in the head. I sat up, breathing deeply as I realised, I was really about to let myself die. I limped over to my bag and pulled out my father's red rag I'd forgotten to give back to him. I tied it around my thigh tightly, throwing my head back and groaning at the pain. I sucked in a sharp breath before putting my bag on my back, tightening it over my chest and waist.

I walked over to the walker and kneeled down. Grabbing my pocketknife, I leaned over his forehead, "Wait, -E" I carved. I struggled, but I grabbed the body and dragged it over to the side of the wall. It took me a minute, but I managed to throw his body into the water. Hopefully, the walker ended up in the same place as Sophia and she'd stay there for me.

I walked off the bridge before climbing down the banking, there was about three feet of sand between the water and the grass, so I started walking... Limping. I should've been trying to track down somewhere I could stitch up the literal bleeding hole in my leg. But, what if Sophia was unconsious? What if she was face down in the water? If she was on the land a walker could come around at any second.

My leg was stinging and burning somehow all at once. I always believed it was one or the other until I walked with an injury like this. I was just lucky there was an exit wound, it would be easier to treat... Probably with dental floss I was going to try and find. I took a break, putting my hands on my knees to catch my breath. I took thirty seconds to ease my wound before I started walking again.

I could've walked right over it. If I missed it, I would've been screwed. I saw drag marks from the water. I squatted down, the way it looked... Sophia dragged herself from the water. I picked up a strand of small brown wool. It was about four inches in length... I brushed off the sand. Suddenly, I remembered the colour of Dolly's hair. This wool came from Dolly. I stood up, watching as there was some clear footprints in the muddy grass, going up the banking. 

I made my way up the grass banking as quick as I could. "Sophia! Sophia!" I screamed.

I screamed her name until my throat was raw. I passed dead walkers, the way the flies surrounded them made me think that they'd been dead for several hours. Of course, Sophia may have only been in the water for ten minutes, fighting to get out... I was walking for approximately four hours with my injury slowing me down.

I got to a road that Sophia must have gotten onto. My head sunk when I realised, I would lose her trail. I wasn't that good at tracking, not nearly as good as my dad. Tracking her on concrete with no more real footprints... That would be impossible. I walked up to the first house I came too; the door was open. I banged the door loudly three times, but nothing came. I saw three dead walkers in the hall. Sophia must have stayed here to stitch up her forehead or any other wound she got from the fall.

I made my way upstairs, in one of the bedrooms I found dental floss on the bed next to an empty bottle of water. Any food or water in this house would've been gone, but at least she didn't think she needed to take the dental floss. Sophia was probably just stitching up the wound on her forehead so didn't need to take the rest. I undid the knot in my dad's rag before wiggling out of my jeans, pained hisses leaving my mouth as I did so. There was a knitting kit by the bed, I reached down and grabbed the pack of needles. Sophia must have grabbed one of the new ones as well. I grabbed one and cleaned it with my mouth, just in case. I threaded the dental floss through and started stitching up my front wound.

A pained groan left my mouth as I did so. I knew for a fact that this was gonna hurt like a bitch.

After stitching up my leg, I wrapped my dad's red rag, now red with my blood as well, around the stitched up wound over my jeans. It didn't hurt to have a little extra protection. I walked out of the town, all of the houses I was passing had opened doors. I knew Sophia was smart enough to raid them.

When the sun began to set, I came across this abandoned car on the road, near an old bridge. I shook my head and sighed before climbing in. I made sure all of the doors could only be opened when you use the handle... Walkers can't use handles. My luck ain't bad enough to run across more people tonight. I got Teddy out of my bag and held him up to my chest. 

Tears left my eyes as I cried quietly, holding onto Teddy with one hand while the other got my scrap book and opened it up. On the first page: me, Sophia, Carl, Rick, mum, dad, Michonne, Hershel, Beth, Maggie, Glenn... Smiling. Happy. They were now either dead or missing. They were all out of my reach. I stared at their smiling faces and cried. I cried myself to sleep with the only photo I had of my family all together. My entire world sized down to a polaroid. The photo was missing people though. People I'd never see the face of again. Lori, T-dog, Dale, Jacob, Jacqui, Andrea, even Axel and Oscar.