Ellie Dixon

Christmas Special

Flashback - Ellie Dixon - Eight years old

Christmas day. A day of love, joy, laughter, selflessness and family. A day where children all over the world were excited to see what Santa had brought them. However, this Christmas morning was different for me than it had been every other year. One year ago that Christmas day, was my best friend's funeral. One year ago today I saw that tiny coffin lowered into the dirt. A life taken to soon. All of our plans had been ruined. We planed to go to the prom together as friends because boys are snotty and gross... Now, I'd attend prom alone, like I'd have to do everything else alone. I doubted I'd ever love anyone ever again like I loved Emily.

Usually, I'd run downstairs and wake my father up off the sofa so he could see what Santa brought. Although, he hadn't arrived this year. I hadn't seen him since my birthday and there was no word from him as to why he was so late. I lay in bed, staring at my clock... My second Christmas without Emily, and I thought it to be the first Christmas without my dad... That is until my bedroom door squeaked open. I turned around in my bed to see who was entering, because my mum wouldn't get up until gone noon. 

When I turned, I saw my father. "Daddy!" I yelled, happily. I jumped up on my bed and into his arms.

"Hi, princess." Dad hugged me tightly back.

I pulled back to see him wearing a Santa's hat which made me laugh. "When did you get in?"

"Last night... I saw that Santa had been, but I decided to let you sleep in." Dad grinned.

"Santa's been?" I perked up.

"You've been a good girl, haven't you?" Dad asked.

"Of course." I scoffed... I decided not to mention I dropped off some drugs for my mother last week. "I missed you, daddy." I hugged him again.

"I missed you too, babe." Dad replied quietly, kissing the side of my head before sitting me down on my bed. He grabbed my slippers and put them on my feet. "Go on, go check out your presents." Dad nodded towards the door.

I jumped off my bed and ran down the hallway, down the stairs and into the living room. The small, artificial Areca Palm Plant sat in the corner of the room with a couple stolen bobbles decorating it... Bobbles I'd stolen from the 4th grade teacher's classroom... He wouldn't miss them. My stocking hang proudly on the dirty fireplace. The stocking Emily knitted for me just before she died, an early Christmas present, because she knew she wouldn't make it to see December 25th. 

The stocking seemed to be full and there were seven presents under the tree; wrapped in red and green with little golden bows. "It's beautiful." I jumped up and down before running forwards.

As I unwrapped all my presents, dad sat on the sofa, watching me with a content smile on his face. He had a brown paper bag around what he was drinking, when I asked he told me it was water... But from the smell of his breath and the more excited he got, I knew he was lying. I had received one of those Barbie heads where you could play with her hair so I was braiding it happily when I heard more footsteps.

I looked up and spotted a very unhappy Isabella Gomez marching down the stairs. "Daryl Shitting Dixon. What the hell do you think you were doing at three in the morning coming into my house?" My mum yelled. She wrapped her leopard print dressing down tighter around her as dad stood up from the sofa.

"I'm visiting my daughter if that's alright with you!" Dad matched her volume. I tried to tune them out as I restarted the braid.

"No, it's not when you made all that racket! Damn woke me up!" She screamed.

"It wasn't daddy, mama. It was Santa. Look." I grinned.

"Oh, Jesus Christ, Ellie. Grow up, it wasn't-" She started.

"Hey! We talked about this!" Dad interrupted her. "I get Christmas. You don't say jack shit about it or I'll tell Snippy what really happened to his five kilograms of weed." Snippy. Local drug dealer. Well known for his... Violent methods of life. 

Mum rolled her eyes dramatically. "Whatever, just make less noise next time you visit your winning sperm cell." She then walked into the kitchen.

"What's a winning sperm cell?" I questioned.

Dad sighed and sat on the sofa. "Don't worry, angel. Just play with your... Whatever that bodyless thing is."

I decided to not push it before I continued to play. Mum came back in with a glass of wine in her hand and slinked down on the sofa. "Oh, I got you both something." I smiled, getting up and running up stairs. I grabbed the two wrapped presents before running back down stairs. The presents were wrapped with old newspaper and string. I passed mum her present and dad his. He pulled me onto his lap as he pulled off the paper to reveal a drawing in a stolen picture frame. I'd drawn me and him ice skating on the lake like he took me to do last Christmas. "Maybe we can go again this year."

"Of course we can, darling. I'll take you tomorrow. I love it, thank you." He kissed my cheek causing me to smile. Mum opened hers and she saw the bracelet I'd made out of coloured string and uncooked pasta. "Woah, that's beautiful, sweetheart. Isn't that right, Isabella?" Dad commented.

"What in the shit is it?" She asked, lighting a cigarette. 

"It's a bracelet. I made it myself." I smiled.

"No kidding you made it. If you didn't I'd be asking for the receipt to go with it." She laughed at her own joke before inhaling the smoke from the cigarette.

"Why don't you put it on?" Dad suggested, a harshness to his tone.

"I ain't wearing that shit." Mum threw it across the room, it broke as it hit the wall and fell onto the floor in different pieces. Tears filled my eyes at my hard work being broken, but it was easy to control them. I should've known she would've reacted like this.

"Damnit, Isabella! You always have to ruin everything!" Dad yelled. "Our daughter-"

"Oh, she's our daughter know? Where in the hell have you been the last eight years?" Mum matched his volume.

"You know why I can't be here!" Dad stated.

"Right, your daddy issues! We've all got issues, Daryl, doesn't mean you get to check out of being a father!" Mum shouted.

"It's what's best!" Dad defended.

"For who? I'm a single mother trying to supply for me and that brat while you're off doing God knows what with that damn brother of yours!"

"Do not talk about Ellie or Merle like that!"

"Shove it up your ass, Daryl, and get the Hell outta my house! Take the kid with you!"

"Ellie, go get dressed, darling. We're going ice skating. Wait upstairs till I come get you. Me and your mama are gonna have a nice calm conversation." Dad said to me, his voice quiet.

I didn't say anything as I headed upstairs. I got changed and sat by my window, watching a drug deal go down outside... Every day's a work day as The Vipers say. My dad didn't come to get me to go ice skating, he stormed out of the house after a very loud argument with my mother. He did come back at nine in the night, he was very, very drunk and just fell asleep on the sofa. Another year gone by, dad drunk and mum drunker, loud arguments and staying in my room to avoid the repercussions of my mum's anger. Merry Christmas, everyone.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas! If you don't celebrate Christmas I hope you enjoy your day! Wishing well to all our key workers who have to go into work even on the big day! Please take a moment out of your day to appreciate all that you have, and think about the people who live in houses like Ellie's and the people who can't afford Christmas xxx