Who Cares

93

Chapter 93 Sacrificial Eulogy
Even if the Ruan family didn’t come to make a noise, Guan Suyi planned to hold a large transcending ritual for her sister-in-law. Because the emperor personally visited the Zhao Mansion yesterday to worship, many relatives and important people came to Jueyin Temple to participate in the ceremony, and there were also Zhao Jinyu’s comrades in arms that come to help, the scene was grand. And he himself was still fighting on the battlefield, and it’s unknown when he would be able to return.

The Ruan family didn’t arrive until after noon, all of them with bruised noses and swollen faces, as if they had suffered a great disaster. Without saying a word, they rushed to the old madam’s feet and shouted for help, bluntly saying that all the money was looted by the bandits, and now they didn’t even have the money to return home, begging the Zhao Mansion to be kind enough to take them in.

After all, it was the Ruan shi’s family, and at her funeral, even if the old madam hated them, she had to pinch her nose to prepare a few rooms and settle them in the Jueyin Temple.

At the same time, Guan Suyi was locking herself in her room to write a sacrificial eulogy for Ruan shi, and later would recite and burn it on the altar to comfort her spirit in heaven. As she said before, she would never admit her mistake for taking out the child by cutting up the stomach, not for her own reputation, but for the child’s future. So what should she write?

She abandoned her distracting thoughts and carefully recalled every bits and pieces of her time with Ruan shi. Not only felt distressed that she was burdened by her appearance and was trapped in poverty, but also admired her for her filial piety to her mother-in-law and kindness to the juniors, and maintaining a harmonious relationship with herself, supported and considerate to each other. Eventually teardrops were dripping down, wetting her lapel.

After a while, she finally picked up the brush and slowly wrote, “In September of the fourth year of Sheng Yuan, at the Jueyin Temple I mourned my sister-in-law Ruan, first met at the beginning of the year…” After writing for a full hour, she cried and wrote, cried and wrote until her eyes turned red before slowly finished the last stroke and sat in a chair in a daze.

At this moment, her mind was filled with Ruan shi‘s voice, face, smile, and dying cries, and completely forgot that Hunnar and Huo Shengzhe person. What continuous love between men and women, what pursuing glory and wealth? Being able to live well and raising a few children is the sweetest thing in the world.

Remembering the heartbroken Mu Mu and the little baby who was waiting to be fed, whom she had named Zhao Huai’en, she finally wiped away the last tear and went to the mourning hall with the sacrificial eulogy.

“Benefactor Guan, has the sacrificial eulogy been written?” Master Xuan Guang asked in a warm voice.

“It’s written, do you want to see it, Master?” Guan Suyi cupped her hands and saluted respectfully.

“No, let the deceased see it first.” Master Xuan Guang stretched out his hand and motioned her to walk up to the altar. When she sat down and struck the wooden fish, he ordered the monks sitting around the altar to start chanting. Damaging a deceased’ body was a major taboo, and it required sincere repentance and recitation of the rebirth scriptures for seven, seven and forty-nine days to make up for it.

The Sanskrit sound and the hazy smoke lingered in the air, a strong sandalwood fragrance invading the left and the right sides, which made people feel solemn and at the same time extraordinarily calm and peaceful. The relatives and dignitaries who came to worship knelt down one after another on the praying mats, put their hands together, and chanted the scriptures.

They looked up to Madam Guan on the viewing altar, wanting to hear how she consoled the dead.

Guan Suyi knelt in front of the coffin with her back to the crowd, and recited a passage of rebirth scriptures sincerely, and then picked up the manuscript paper to recite the sacrificial eulogy. At this period of time, most of the sacrificial eulogy imitated the four-character rhyme of the “Book of Songs” elegant ode, or used parallel prose, aiming to be solemn and serious; but she recalled the sadness of the past, and did not want to limit the expression with four or five characters or six or seven sentences that blocked the grief-stricken thoughts. So she broke the convention and format, and wrote an essay.