secret family // baylor (completed)

pick the pieces up again

"Thank you for letting us stay here."

I said to Mercades as I held Eli and Adalyn as she put together the pop-up crib. Mercades was the only person I could think of that I could go to anymore. Fergal lost my trust. Besides anything about Kinsley, I don't want a friendship with him anymore. He sold me out. And I can't forgive him anymore.

"Of course. I would never turn you guys away."

Mercades said as she placed the crib next to Eli's, took Adalyn from me, and put her in there. I put Eli in his crib and smiled as I looked at the two sleeping babies.

"They're only three weeks old and they're already sleeping together."

Mercades said as I playfully slapped her shoulder.

"Let's let them sleep."

I said as I walked out of the nursery. We sat down on the couch as I let out a sigh.

"How are you feeling?"

Mercades asked.

"I don't know. I never thought I would be getting a divorce. I always thought I would die with Link. But now I won't even be in his arms ever again."

I said as I tried to keep the tears in my eyes. But it's not worth it. They always spill out. 

"Have you guys thought about marriage counseling?"

Mercades asked.

"I don't think I have the strength for that. I already have my own demons. I need to figure myself out before I jump into any type of a relationship. I just want to focus on myself and Adalyn for right now. That's why I just gave Kinsley to Fergal. It hurts my heart but I can't take care of both of them right now. And I probably just seem like the most horrible mother in the world."

"Oh, Pam. You are an amazing mother. Don't you ever doubt yourself like that again."

Mercades said as she hugged me. 

"I just want to be loved Mercades. That's all I've ever wanted in my life. And it's been torn away from me so many times. Any guy that I ever loved has just broke my heart beyond repair. I just want to find the perfect guy for me. That's all I want."

"And you'll find that guy. I promise. The right guy is out there for you. And he will love you and Adalyn and Kinsley and all of your baggage. It's not a bad thing to have baggage. And I promise that some Prince Charming will come around and sweep you off your feet. I promise you."

"Thank you Mercy. I love you."

I said as I wiped my tears.

"I love you too. Now, get some sleep before one of our babies start crying and wakes up the other ones."

Mercy said as I smiled. I laid back on the couch and just let a breath out. I hope Mercy is right. I really just want my prince charming already. But I need to work on me and my girls first. And maybe that means baby daddies being out of the equation. Who knows what the future holds for the three of us?