secret family // baylor (completed)

rekindled

"Pizza's here!" 

Fergal called as he walked into my house. I guess it's his turn to watch over me. I sighed as pulled the blanket over my body. Becky got me to move from my bed to the couch so I guess that's an improvement. But who really cares anymore. I'm still depressed. I'm still broken. And I still need a fucking babysitter.

"I'll see you in a few days, Pam. Don't have too much fun, you two."

Becky said as Fergal walked into the living room with the pizza. Becky left as Fergal placed the pizza box on the end table and sat down next to me on the couch.

"You need to eat something."

Fergal said as he opened the box. 

"I'm not hungry."

I mumbled back.

"Yet, I didn't ask. Don't make me shove it in your mouth like I did back when you were champ."

Fergal said as I let out a small laugh. Back when Fergal and I were together, I was champ and was the most insecure I had ever become. I compared myself to everyone. So I starved myself. That lasted a whole two days until Fergal found out and started forcing me to eat. Literally shoving food in my mouth. I don't think I want to relive those days. I sat up on the couch and grabbed a slice of pizza out of the box.

"That's better."

Fergal said as I took a bite out of my slice.

"How's Kinsley?"

I asked him.

"She's fine. She's excited about her brother being here soon."

"How about after today?"

"She just didn't know what was going on. It's not you, Pam."

Fergal said as I sighed.

"I wish I could believe that."

I said as I took another bite of my pizza.

"Don't let it bother you. She'll come around. She's just used to being around Vero and I for the last few weeks. She loves you. I promise."

Fergal said as I rested my head on his shoulder.

"I just want everything to stop. Life is moving too fast. I just need a break from it all."

I said as Fergal draped his arms around my shoulders. This makes me think of the old times. Just him and I, a box of pizza, and just talking through our problems.

"I know. You just need to look on the bright side of things. Kinsley and Addie love you. They always will. And they will come around. And you have twins on the way. And they'll always love you. And you have Becks and Mercy and Ashley and all of us here for you. We aren't going to let you fall."

Fergal said as I smiled.

"You know, you don't have to be here."

I said as I wrapped my arms around him.

"Well, I want to be. Besides, Ashley might kill me if I leave you here alone."

He said as I laughed. As the night went on, we ended up lying together on the couch as we watched a movie. It feels good just to be back in Fergal's arms. Even if its in a platonic way. Our time as a couple is over. I don't think we'll ever get that back. And that's fine. I just want to lay in his arms while I still have the chance.