secret family // baylor (completed)

give me what i deserve

Becky and I walked into the front door of my house and dropped our shopping bags as I let out an audible sigh. Seeing Fergal was just...bittersweet. It was great to see him happy and well for his son. But it broke my heart to have to turn him down like that. But I know in my heart that I am not the one for him. He founds his true love. It was Vero. And how he may move on, I don't know. But I know that I cannot put myself through being the rebound girl again. Not after the last time that happened with Fergal.

"I can't wait to dress the girls up in all of these!"

Becky said as she showed me the endless amount of outfits that she had picked up the twins. After the first few outfits though, she stopped and begin to read my face. Was it the uninterested, tired, sad look in my eyes? Or my reek of desperation and sadness? The world may never know.

"What's wrong?"

Becky asked as she put the clothes she was showing me back in the bag.

"I saw Fergal at the baby store today. And he asked me out."

I said as I let a breath out.

"That's so exciting. What did you say?"

"I said no."

I sighed.

"Why did you do that?"

"Because I can't be his rebound anymore, Becky! He used to me get over and get closer to Vero the last time we were together. What's to say he won't find another girl this time?"

I said with tears in my eyes.

"Because he loves you."

"I just don't know if I believe that anymore. Gosh, all I want is a happily ever after, Becks. Everyone gets one. Why can't I?"

"You will one day. I promise."

Becky said as she hugged me. I want to believe her when she tells me that Fergal loves me. I want to put my faith into her words. But I just can't. I have to listen to my head for once and decide that enough is enough. I can't be Fergal's second choice all of the time. I'm a woman that any guy would be lucky to have as his first choice. And one day, I'll find that guy. But until then, I think steering clear of Fergal, besides co-parenting of course, is the best set of actions.