Beca: uh, hi. This is weird. You guys are probably confused, just... roll with it
Chloe: HELLO! WE ARE THE BARDEN BELLAS!
Aubrey: please turn the caps lock off.
Chloe: sorry
Stacie: okay but where's the camera? Where am I supposed to look?
CR: there's no camera, this is literally a book
Stacie: so how will everyone know how good I look right now?!
Aubrey: readers, she looks good.
Stacie: much appreciated, thank you.
Emily: if this is a book, can I speak in fonts?
Fat Amy: no.
Emily: because I can't or because you don't want me to?
Fat Amy: yes.
Flo: I'm a little confused as to what we are doing
Stacie: is this like, a reality show?
Chloe: did they finally receive my application???
Stacie: oh my god, Chloe
Aubrey: I second Stacie's sentiment.
Stacie: you sent out an application without ME?!
Aubrey: I retract my statement.
Fat Amy: I once was on an Australian reality show
Beca: do I dare ask?
Fat Amy: it was a mix between Real Housewives and Survivor. Not as good of a mix as you would think
CR: who would think that?
Emily: did you have to eat weird meals?
Fat Amy: honey, I had to kill weird meals
Stacie: I would have the skillset for that
CR: oh yeah, Brainy and Brawny Stacie Conrad
Stacie: I would bring Beca along
Beca: why me??
Stacie: cuz you would do the nitty gritty and I'd be your arm candy, the apple of the public eye
Beca: I'm not the most equipped for that, though
Stacie: but you're the most submissive
Beca: wha- I am not!!
CR: yes you softie
Emily: I can volunteer?
Stacie: no Legacy, you're too sweet, I don't want to enslave you
Beca: but you're okay with enslaving me?!
Stacie: Emily is a baby squish patootie. You, on the other hand, are my bitch
Fat Amy: I was gonna make a suggestive joke about whipping but I'll butt out and enjoy the show instead
Beca: watch it Conrad, I'm gonna sell you on Craigslist
Flo: that's the scariest legal site I know
Stacie: you wouldn't dare Baby Boo Bee Bec, you secretly worship the ground I walk on
CR: Beca, pull through. You need to beat her at her own game!
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Barden Bellas
FanfictionThings the Bellas haven't said, but probably would have. Plus some original oneshots. The jokes used are all from the mind of yours truly, not from any other franchise (tv shows, books, movies, etc.) unless stated, so if you're gonna use them , ple...
