Aubrey: Hey Beca, what princess do you want to be when we go to Disneyland?
Beca: I'm not a princess, I'm a warrior!
Stacie: we'll let you be Cinderella.
Beca: ...
Beca: Cinderella is fine.
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Stacie: Chloe is SpongeBob because she's always happy and energetic, Fat Amy is Patrick because she's so carefree, Beca is Squidward because she's always bored and hates people, Flo is Sandy because she's an immigrant, CR is Gary because she keeps it real, Jessica and Ashley are Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy because they're always together, Emily is Pearl because she's the youngest one and Lilly is Plankton because you never know what she's up to
Beca: who are you then?
Stacie: I'm the Krabby Patty cause everybody likes me.
Fat Amy: I thought you were gonna say "cause everybody has had some"
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Chloe: I would like to make a toast.
Beca: oh no.
Chloe: I love you guys. You are like a butt, because I can always rely on you when I need a break from everything.
Aubrey: there she is.
Chloe, crying: you guys are my butt. *sniffing* for real. Cheers.
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Fat Amy: I make mistakes because I'm human.
Aubrey: no you make mistakes because you're an idiot who has no understanding of consequences nor any socially acceptable maturity level nor respect for other people's mental and emotional balance.
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Fat Amy: Beca is on her period so I'm going to be her period-translator.
Beca, holding her stomach: ugh shit
Fat Amy: "hi guys"
Beca: fuckfuckfuck
Fat Amy: "it's lovely to see you all"
Beca: motherfuckerrrr
Fat Amy: "motherfuckers"
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Beca: girls, tonight we're not just gonna kill it on stage. We're gonna slaughter it, drown it, slap the life out of it and destroy the goddamn wreckage. Got it?
Emily: do we have to be that violent?
Chloe, putting warpaint on: yes.
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Barden Bellas
FanfictionThings the Bellas haven't said, but probably would have. Plus some original oneshots. The jokes used are all from the mind of yours truly, not from any other franchise (tv shows, books, movies, etc.) unless stated, so if you're gonna use them , ple...
