Things the Bellas haven't said, but probably would have.
Plus some original oneshots.
The jokes used are all from the mind of yours truly, not from any other franchise (tv shows, books, movies, etc.) unless stated, so if you're gonna use them , ple...
Aubrey: you can't waste all your money on gambling! CR: wanna bet? Aubrey: no!
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Emily: I'm so scared... recently I started hearing this voice Beca: what voice? Emily: it sounds like mine but it also doesn't. I don't know how to explain it Beca, concerned: oh sweetie... what does it say? Emily: it's just... constantly in my head. it won't leave me alone and it's like it's trying to control me Beca: how so? Emily: it will say stuff like... "that looks good let's eat that" or, I don't know... randomly start singing a song I don't even like Beca: Emily: why are you looking at me like that? Beca: baby, those are your thoughts CR: what do you mean it started recently??
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Flo: truth be told, I'm bear polar CR: bi polar Flo: the way you dismiss me is deeply offensive
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Beca: it was so sweet of Chloe to buy me this friendship ring Fat Amy: wedding bend Beca: yeah this friendship bend Fat Amy: uh huh Beca: and to make me sign this friendship contract thingy, even though it's a little bit weird Fat Amy: did you read it? Beca: nah I trust her Fat Amy: right Beca: she even suggested we make a joint account and I agreed, it could come in handy Fat Amy: yeah. you do know you guys are married, right? Beca: what do you mean? Fat Amy: damn. congrats dummy! or good luck!
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Emily: ugh, algebra is so hard Benji, scooting closer: wanna know what else is hard? Emily: *blinks* Benji: geometry Emily: word
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Aubrey: I need you girls to be... powerful superstars! Beca: it's ok Bree, Emily left the room Aubrey: I need you girls to be bad bitches!!
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Ashley: what did the tomato say to his tomato childhood friend? "we should ketchup!" Jessica: *giggles* Flo: if the tomatoes were real people, this would be a horror true crime story and they would be dead Ashley: Jessica: Ashley: what did the egg childhood friend say at the funeral? Jessica: what? Ashley: mayo rest in peace! Jessica: *snickers*
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Benji, to Emily: you take my breath away Flo, nodding knowingly: asthma
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Beca: guys your PB&J's are almost ready! Emily: did you cut out the crust on mine? Beca: of course, love Stacie: did you cut out mine too? Beca: grow up
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Chloe: what are you doing with a chainsaw? Aubrey: well you said you wanted to ask for Beca's hand but I'm not sure she's gonna give it up willingly Chloe: in marriage! I wanted to ask for her hand in marriage! Aubrey: what? but you only just started dating! Chloe: I love her! I just, when you know you know! Aubrey: ... Chloe: so? Aubrey: ...are you sure you don't wanna go through with plan A? Chloe: that was never plan A!!!
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Chloe: it's a beautiful day to take a walk! Beca: it's never a beautiful day to take a walk Flo: it's never a beautiful day Fat Amy: it's never a day to take a walk
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Chloe: please Bec! can we keep her? Beca, sighing: Chlo, you can't take in all the strays... Chloe: just this one! Pleaseee! I promise I will feed her and rub her belly and play with her! Beca: still not sure... Emily, walking in: hi, I'm sorry for intruding but I couldn't help but hear and... Beca, immediately pulling her close, rubbing her head and pinching her cheek: SHE'S SO CUTE! Chloe: did you just... squeal? Beca: she's staying in my room! Chloe: but Amy- Beca: can move to your room, you guys can bond like that! Chloe: but- Beca, grabbing Emily's hand: Chlo, don't worry about her, I'll take her to the best diner, get her home before curfew, bathe her and tuck her into bed! Chloe: b-bathe her?? that doesn't seem necessary... Beca: so cute! so cute! what toys do you like? let's go shopping, I have Chloe's card! Chloe, helplessly watching them leave: hold on- Chloe: what the hell...?
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Fat Amy: Aubrey: what? what is it? Fat Amy: ...do you want the bad news or the good news first? Aubrey, frowning : the... good news? Fat Amy: alright... remember when you bet against Chloe that me and Beca would be the most likely to rob a bank? Aubrey: yes? Fat Amy, forcing a smile: congrats!
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Stacie: Chloe, can you help me out with this? Chloe, concentrated: not now, I'm doing my morning readings Stacie: that's a cereal box Chloe, staring at the box: it says there's a sparkly toy inside
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Aubrey: you are doing your own cardio, right? Fat Amy: listen here, I can do Cardio, Nickio, Dojao, Megano, whatever you like just don't make me run
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A/N: hello everyone! How's it going? I've been cooking up some ideas and have a few oneshots in the drafts as well. So I'll let you guys decide once again, which one would you like to read first? let me know! xx
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