The Sweet Husband

You Cannot Change Crazy

If you, at any time, ever needed to know the difference between men and women, the sweet husband thinks he has it all figured out.

He always has some philosophical issue to discuss over morning coffee, and today it was the difference between men and women.

According to SH, if a man is crazy, he is consistantly crazy. Now, he doesn't understand why a woman would marry a crazy man, because, since they are no good at hiding it, she had to know he was crazy before she married him.

I conjectured that maybe she thinks she can change him. He said you change diapers, you change your mind, you change your opinion, but you can't change crazy.

But then he says women will be perfectly sane for several years and then all of a sudden take a sharp turn to crazy and the next day be right back to sane, so men have no clue when it's going to happen, or how to protect themselves against it.

I told him I think I may be running behind, because I can't remember ever having a crazy day, so I need to catch up.

He gave me a look that was a little wild, and I asked him why are you looking at me like that?

He began to remind me of some things.

Do you remember throwing all my clothes I left hanging on the same chair for 10 years into the trash can?

Yes but do you remember me telling you every day for 10 years that I have to move them off the chair and put them in the hamper, why don't you just put them in the hamper to begin with?

Then he reminded me of the time I started picking up everything in the living room and throwing it at him just as he came in from working 36 hours straight.

Yes, I remember, do you remember that, after me telling you for years not to say the f word in front of the baby because she repeats everything you say,I had to go to the school that day because Brandi told her teacher that she wasn't going to color that f'ing grass green because it was cold outside and when it's cold grass is brown?

THEN he says, see I made my point, you knew I was crazy before we got married and you married me anyway, and you go crazy right out of the clear blue sky and scare the hell out of me.

I give up. I may scare him again today.