I am in fucking misery.... the kids are back in school, I cried.... Nikki did too, we both hated to see them go......the kids, fucking miss us....and to top it all off.... i feel like shit, well I am starting to notice. I know, I know.... what you're thinking, but I can't fucking concentrate on ANYTHING but my misery. Two months have passed, and the tour is ending....in fact, tonight is the last show....and I've been quiet, EVERYONE is worried...including the kids and my husband especially, who has begged me to tell him what's wrong...but I refuse, we've already been stressed enough and so has Nikki, though I know better.....i am so fucking tired....I growl angrily to myself, Nikki who'd went to grab me something to drink...should be back any second....
I feel dizzy.... very dizzy....
"Uggh...." Less angry.... more worried now, but I don't want to let Nikki down, our fans down.... anyone down really, and fuck.... nauseous too!! "F-Fuck..."
"Steven? Steven!!---" Nikki I think....and this is the last thing I remember until I wake up, still feeling sick and I seem to be lying down in an ambulance?!! I quickly panic....
"Nikki?! Nikki.... w-what's going on?!" Why.... the show.... people...are gonna hate me...let you down...sorry.... sorry...." I whimper, getting sick.... Everywhere.... not being able to stop....and then everything fades again......To this day, I can't remember my husband replying.... he did though, he did...he was fucking terrified....
I find myself waking once again....to beeping noises and Nikki? Whose shoulders tremble, and I hear the unmistakable sound of tears....
"Nik..." I groan, feeling dizzy, closing my eyes, breathing in and out deeply. I search for my husband's hands, needing him....and I feel tears stream down my face, as it passes....
"Hey...Hey...I'm here....and I'm so fucking sorry baby. I haven't noticed...I mean we've been busy, but that's no excuse. You haven't been yourself, I realize....and its more than missing the kids....and, what you managed to get out on the way here....NO ONE could or would ever hate you...the show was canceled...you were AND are more important....and....and....i just am scared of how will you are....and I should have taken better care of you....."
"Nikki..." Slowly, "You've begged me to tell you what's wrong.... but we've been stressed enough between touring, the kids going back to school, I didn't want to make things even worse."
"You could NEVER MAKE things worse." Nikki counters as suddenly he says in remembrance, "They've collected blood...and...oh my god...." His eyes widen, and then they concentrate on me...more specifically my stomach and I follow his gaze....and FINALLY I SEE what my husband is getting at, tentatively I touch it....and....
"Oh my god.... Nikki...." I can't believe I haven't noticed this.... this.... how the HELL is my stomach so round?! I mean, yes I showed early with Rain, Frankie and Drew....but, this...is something else...my stomach even bigger...pregnant, I have to be pregnant.....I burst into tears, face in my hands, feeling overwhelmed, feeling scared....i don't ever remember feeling THIS scared with any of my previous pregnancies, but Nikki....my Nikki, I feel his arms wrap carefully around me, holding me, my head buried in his chest. I can feel myself tremble....
"Steven?! Oh Steven...come back to me babe...I know...I know you are so scared right now, overwhelmed and I don't ever remember you being this scared before, I am scared too for you...your stomach is a lot bigger then with our.... I mean, I do believe you are pregnant..." I manage to look up at Nikki, tears in his eyes.... they stream down mine, but I see the wonder there. Nothing else is said before the Doctor comes in, and I bury my face in Nikki's chest, as we receive confirmation of what we've finally seemed to have figured out, I am pregnant and they want to do an ultra-sound and check on things, after having done some more preliminary crap during which I had a well hell I don't know how long...but a puking intermission if you will. I am given something or other, and I just feel so tired...so weak and how will we tell the kids? I know they are worried.
YOU ARE READING
Betrayed by Your Guns & Betrayed by your Crϋe (A Steven Adler/Nikki Sixx story)
RomanceSummary: What if what you thought you knew about Guns 'n' Roses and Motley Crϋe Changed, that the story was different? What if Steven Adler is lied to or Coerced into Rehab and is fired from his band and ends up becoming the drummer for Motley Crϋe...
