Betrayed by Your Guns & Betrayed by your Crϋe (A Steven Adler/Nikki Sixx story)

Chapter 31: Welcome to 1990 Part 2 (Steven Adler)

My birthday has passed, Nikki really made it special...then to me everything he does is special...HE IS special. Still January, towards the end of the month and two weeks have passed. Nikki and I done some things for work, like interviews which we made fun if they were boring. Guns 'n' Roses is apparently, rumor has it going to record a double LP and apparently rumor has it too they get along now well better than they did before as they DO have their moments, which really stings...no hurts, because it makes ME feel like I was the problem. And too, apparently Tommy Lee is pregnant...so yeah.

Currently, I am in the practice studio pounding away on drums...getting out all my aggression and am crying...yes crying...sadly even playing my violin didn't help.... i abruptly quit and hold my head in my hands and SOB. I thought news or shit about Guns wouldn't hurt so much.... but with what I've heard recently...I find I can't help it...I need Nikki...I need....

"Steven?! Oh god...what's wrong?!" A very worried Nikki asks me, I can't answer...I feel more than I see him, tilt my face up or try to gently, but I wont budge...think I'm headed into panic attack territory.... next thing, I am vaguely aware of is Nikki and I are in the floor, him holding me tightly and rocking me back and forth, while I try and breathe. "Baby...please, I need you to try and calm down before you make yourself pass out. Whatever is going on, I promise you it will be ok...and, and I'll help and love you thru it and if I need to kick some ass."

It takes I don't know how long before I calm down enough to speak, not sobbing but still crying. Nikki gently thumbs away my tears and I take a deep breath, "I-I was thinking about the recent Guns news.... that they apparently get along great, still dysfunctional but better than they did. But yeah, they make ME feel like...I was always the problem....and hmm, seems as if Axl has gotten Tommy pregnant... I.... just wish, every time I think I am getting better shit like this happens." My tone spent and very much bitter. "I wish them well, I truly do...but its do damn unfair that I was abused and used and then now, they are practically 'saints."

"That's bullshit...you were never the problem.... you weren't and you aren't. its their loss that they didn't know or care what an amazing person and musician you are. I'm not just saying that as your husband." I smile a little at the last words as Nikki continues. "They're a bunch of dumbasses....it hurts though i know, because they seem to love hurting you....and I want to HURT them. Steven, you are allowed to have your moments and I imagine that it hurts because they won't acknowledge you or apologize.... but karma will get them...and you remember our pact?" Nikki pauses a moment, I nod. "It doesn't make it fair either that they treat Tommy so well but you like shit...fuck them.... but what you said about wishing them well, I could tell you meant that. You have a big heart, and I am proud of you...like I said, the pact...you've moved on and became something, someone greater than you could have imagined in the beginning. But I knew it all along. I've always believed in you, and I always will, and I love you. God, do I love you."

"I love you too, Nikki...what I'd do without you, I don't fucking know but I DO know I'll never have to find out...kiss me...I need to feel you...." I whisper and I feel his breath ghost across my lips before he kisses me, a kiss that is loving, passionate and gives me strength.

"Tell you what.... i am gonna pamper you, how about a massage and I'll run you a bath.... bubble bath...and I'll fix dinner." Nikki smiles at me, and I must smile back.

"All of it sounds divine Nikki, I love and appreciate everything you do for me."

"Same here...now..." To my surprise, Nikki picks me up in his arms and carries me bridal style up to our bedroom in practically one move.

"Damn...you are superman or MY superman." I comment on the way up to our bedroom.

Nikki smirks a little, but his eyes are soft. "Well of course!" We at last make it up to our bedroom where Nikki gently lays me on the bed, and I take my shirt off as he immediately beings kneading my muscles, taking away my tensions.

"AAAHHHH...y-yes.... feels wonderful!!" I sigh blissfully.

"I'm glad blue-eyes.... there is nothing I love more than taking care of you."

Nikki's words get me a little bit misty, worth it though. After the massage, Nikki gives me another 'massage' in the form of kisses, lots of kisses...and I sit up in bed, him with his arms around me, both of us perfectly content.

"How about I run that bath blue-eyes?" I murmur my agreement, kissing him once again and Nikki disappears into our bathroom, and not too long after fetches me, leading me by the hand as I then strip and step carefully into the tub and lay back. "I'm gonna get started on dinner, you relax here in the tub. How does your Waldorf Chicken salad, homemade chips, and cookies sound?"

"Sounds good Nikki! Thank you, baby." I smile at him, he kisses me, and we say, 'I love you', Nikki then telling me to stay in there until I wrinkle, making me laugh.

Ah, this is nice!! Nikki really spoils me, but then the spoiling is mutual.... anytime, I am feeling down, like I was earlier.... he makes me feel better, and he referred to himself as my 'husband'.... hearing that, he is right...and I just really love the words.... a few more weeks and it will be a reality......

I indeed stay in the bath until my skin begins to wrinkle, carefully I get out...drain the tub and dry my self off with the large fluffy towels Nikki laid out and change into a t-shirt and shorts.... the t-shirt in question is Nikki's, I really love wearing his clothes and I breath in the scent...HIS scent. Before I can think to head downstairs, Nikki appears in the doorway of our bedroom, and he looks at me...like it's the first time, he always looks at me like that and I love it.

"Oh Steven...you look STUNNING!"

"I could say the same thing about YOU." I counter. "I was just fixing to come downstairs, I lost track of time." I add on. Nikki comes to stand in front of me, taking me in his arms.

"I wanted you to relax and you did....and, coincidence.... but dinner is ready. I came to get you."

"Thank you, baby....and you know? I noticed you referred to yourself as my husband earlier." Softly.

"I AM...all that's left is to make it official, just a few more weeks." Nikki says echoing my earlier thoughts. He is made for me; of that I have no doubt. We make our way downstairs, to our kitchen table where Nikki has everything set up and even has candles lit, he pulls out my chair before then sitting down himself.

"It looks wonderful and SO romantic Nikki!" I gush. Nikki chuckles a bit.

"I have to show off some babe, make my husband proud."

"Ditto." I smile and we dig in...as always conversation flows easily and there is much laughter and ribbing. Sure, Nikki and I have arguments here and there, but we always work it out...he is my love, my life and my everything. I can't wait to marry him!!

A/N: Tender moments with Steven and Nikki, a wee bit of Guns news and more. Next chapter, so excited! Its Nikki and Steven's wedding! Stay tuned!