Something about you

Chapter 62.

{Caitlyn}

Calling Donovan my dad felt weird.

It felt foreign actually.

He hadn't been there for me for basically my entire life. I honestly can't say I even remember being around him.

I can't remember doing anything with him.
Even if I did they'd probably just be blurred inages, since it was so long ago.

I only recognized him because of his looks, and I simply had a feeling.

You know how mothers have that motherly instinct? I had a kind of- daughterly instinct at the moment.

I just... knew.

I look to Michael for his reaction.

Waiting for him to get angry, confused, sad, happy, anything. But no. I get nothing.

He just stands there. Still. No emotions on his face.

He isn't as easy to read as I had thought before.

"I didn't know Cait, was who you were here to visit..." Michael tells him, confusion in his voice.

Wait a minute...

"Michael, you knew? You knew he was here?" I asked, my voice cracking.

"Yes Cait."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Cait, I knew this man was here. But I didn't know he was your father. I know just as little, or even less, then you know of him. I just didn't recognize him. Please, don't be upset. I'm sorry."

"Michael, I'm not upset." I sigh.

Well at least not at Michael.

I'm really confused. Those thoughts from before are still running through my head.

I just want to know why he's here. Why now?

"I'm just... so stressed." I murmur.

"I know baby," he sighs as well, "this will all be over soon."

I look up, into his eyes, looking for a trace of lying.

I want him to be right. I don't want this to go on any further. There's so much going on, I don't understand how Michael hasn't left me.

But yet, through it all, Michael's eyes only show sincerity.  In his eyes, I only see truth and love and hope.

I guess he sees the worry on my face because he bends down and places a soft, loving kiss on my lips.

"I promise." He soothes, rubbing my back.

Donovan clears his throat, causing Michael and I to look up at him.

"Caitlyn, we have to talk."

For some reason something in me clicks, as if it hadn't been functioning before but it fixed itself and it was now fully functional.

"Talk." I answer shortly with an attitude.

He looks at me surprised then looks at the ground seeming to be deep in thought.

Michael keeps rubbing my back, trying to comfort me still.

Donovan walks towards me and hands me a small, business like card with a number, which I'm guessing is his.

I stare down at the card, as we all stay silent for a while before he speaks again.

"We have to sit down and talk. But being in the condition you're in, I won't bother you. Honestly, sweetie, all I want to do is talk. But because I care about you, and your health, I'll wait a while longer."

"You didn't want to talk back then! When I was younger! When I needed you! When I had nobody, nothing! When I had to stay home alone because mom had to work night shifts to be able to pay everything!"

I stopped... trying to recollect myself. This time I didn't yell.. I whispered. Barely audible.

"We called... alot. You changed your number. Every single time. Mom would tell it was the wrong number, but I knew. I knew it was you picking up. You just didn't want to talk."

My attempts at staying calm were blown over and I was now raising my voice again.

"And care? Don't you dare say you
care about me, or my health, or anything. That's complete bullshit! You didn't care when I was laying up in the hospital bed for weeks on end! Guess who was there everytime!?"

I waited.

"Mommy was! Not you! Guess who else was there when I was younger, laying in the hospital fighting for my life!? Michael! Michael fucking Jackson was! And he's fucking famous! And we were only children, but he was still there! He made time, and so did his entire family! His entire famous family, might I add! But you? You couldn't even so much as call!"

I scream, everything in me is boiling, I'm raging with anger, to be completely honest I don't know why. Maybe I've built up so much anger, from who knows what, that now that I have a reason to, I'm completely lashing out.

Donovan goes to speak but I raise my hand for him not to.

With the help of Michael rubbing my back and shoulders, and placing a kiss on my forehead, I am able to calm down and breathe.

"You didn't care then, and honestly Donovan, Jaden, whatever your name is, I don't know if I want to talk to you anytime soon. I'll call you if I do. But right now, please leave."

"I understand sweetie but listen to me, I didn't mean to...."

I swear this man makes me bipolar.

"Don't call me sweetie Donovan! Leave! Get out! Get out now!"

Anger boils in my blood and runs through my veins and once again I'm light headed.

The same blurry in and out vision returns.

I hear people talking but I don't know who. And at the moment I don't care.

This time though I don't try to fight it.

I allow myself to black out. Falling into a trance. Falling into nothingness.

Of course I don't let go enough to cause harm to my child, only enough to let me escape the madness.

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I just wanted to thank MiloJackson and kxnyewxst for giving me advice. They made me feel so much better yesterday and it's because of them that I'm updating today & still writing. Thank you both ❤️❤️ ~L.M.F.M <3 & thank all you Moonwalkies for understanding.