Insanity (Grayson Dolan FANFIC)

Thirty nine

Ethan's POV

I walk up behind Grayson at the table he was sitting at. I tapped him on the shoulder and shot him a serious glare. Kind of like a 'what the fuck are you doing' glare. He rolled his eyes and got up from his seat.

"Sorry girls, i'll be right back," he says giving them a smile each. They both giggled and nodded at him which made my stomach hurl up inside.

Grayson and i walked out of the cafeteria and were standing behind the library which was a really secluded spot surrounded by trees. I turn around and we look at each other face to face.

"What do you think you're doing Gray? Your girlfriend was in there looking at you like a fool," i said in a harsh tone. He just stood there looking around with his hands in his pockets.

"Who cares? Since she can go around doing whatever she wants," he exclaimed. My eyes went wide and my stare at him became darker.

"Aaliyah hasn't done shit to you! Do you know the amount of times you've done stupid shit and yet she still somehow forgave you? If i ever did shit like this to Amy, i wouldn't even expect her to take me back. You're so fucking stupid Gray."

I took a deep breath trying to study his face, and his body language. I somewhat knew he was disappointed in himself but this isn't my brother. What he does is a reflection of me and i can't have his reputation go down the drain. I walk up to him, so close that our faces were just inches apart.

"You don't even deserve Aaliyah," i said in a voice so dark that i didn't even know i had. All i saw was his breathing becoming heavier. I pushed past him hitting our shoulders together and walk back to the cafeteria.

Grayson's POV

I knew Ethan was right. I didn't deserve Aaliyah, i never did. I kept thinking about how amazing this girl is, and how scared i am to lose her but i don't even realise that i'm losing her this way.

In my heart i know that Aaliyah is the one for me, and she always has been. Lately i've just missed being single, not that things with Ally haven't been good but i just don't feel it.

—————
Aaliyah's POV

I got home from school and instantly fell asleep in my bed. I was exhausted and what happened with Grayson didn't exactly make my day better either. I just don't understand, like we were fine this morning and then he acts up.

I slowly rubbed my eyes open and turn to grab my phone off my bed side table. I check my phone to see a few instagram and snapchat notifications but also

My love❤️ : Can i come over?
My love❤️: Aaliyah?
My love❤️: I'm coming over.

Oh shit. It was all sent about 10 minutes ago which meant he would be here soon. I quickly put on a sweater and my track pants and my hair up in a ponytail. I wasn't in the mood to see him but if i wanted an explanation then now is the time.

I soon heard a knock on my door and i went downstairs. I found Grayson staring obliviously at the ground until i opened up the door.

"Why didn't you reply to my texts?" he asked raising a brow.

"Sorry i was napping, come in," i said moving to the side giving him room to walk through. I close the door behind me and we walk to the living room and we sit on opposite sides of the couch.

"Come closer Aaliyah," he said with a soft tone.

""I'm okay, why are you here?" i said just wanting him to get to the point.

I could see his jaw constantly clenching and unclenching. He was playing with his hands and that was something he did when he was uncomfortable. He bit the inside of his cheek before his mouth opened up to say something.

"I'm sorry for overreacting. I know it was stupid but i just get over jealous and overprotective," i shook my head.

"No, Grayson. You have never been like this even 2 years before when we were dating. You have never overreacted this way just because you were 'jealous'" i said holding up two fingers making quotation marks. He couldn't even look at me. I don't understand why something like this is so hard for him to talk about when it shouldn't be a big deal.

"Grayson. What's really wrong?" i asked. He took a deep breath before saying the words that made my heart want to burst.

"I think we should take a break.."

"For what? Grayson, for what?! What have i done to you? We were completely fine! We were happy, you were in love with me just this morning and NOW you decide you don't?" my voice kept cracking and trying to contain my tears that were just flowing from my red eyes.

"I didn't say i didn't love y—," i cut him off.

"No, because if you did love me then we wouldn't need a break. I don't do 'breaks.' Breaks are just another way of saying let's break up before actually breaking up."

"Why don't you love me the way i love you Grayson?"

"I don't feel the same. I miss being free, being by myself," He replied. I was covering my face with my hands at this point, my tears were dripping from my face and my throat hurt from the silent crying.

"You told me you love me. This is so sudden, out of nowhere. I gave myself to you, we made love just the other day. I told you that i love you and meant it and now you're just saying it didn't mean shit to you? Not once have i stopped you from doing what you want to, going out with the boys or just in general. Nothing has changed the way i feel about you, why is it so hard for you to love me back?"

He scooted closer to me but i moved further away. His arms were the last place i wanted to be, i can't believe he was saying and thinking these things. This was happening all because of Adam or because these things have been on his mind for a while?

"I don't deserve you Aaliyah, and you don't deserve a guy like me. I'm stupid to ruin what we have and i know that but i don't deserve someone like you. You can do better than me and i'm holding you back."

"You aren't making any sense. You say you want to be free but also you don't deserve me? You're stupid, i already know that. I wouldn't be with you if i thought you didn't deserve me. I fucking love you and now you're just hurting me. You're taking advantage of me this way."

Grayson's POV

Little did she know i was going to move to New Jersey soon. Very soon. I already know long distance wasn't going to work and this was just some way to make leaving easier.