"Oh, god, I'm going on a date with my best friend and someone who's absolutely adorable. It's fine. No. Yes. You're fine. It'll be fine," Chan whispers to himself.
He grasps onto the choker that hung outside of his jewelry box. He wanted them to top him. If that subject was even in the conversation. He wanted to look the part.
Shit, he was a mess.
"Felix!" He calls, staring at the necklace.
The youngest Aussie comes into the view, hanging onto the doorframe. "What's up?"
"Does- will this make me look subby?" Chan's cheeks were flushed, but he needed his friend's opinion.
"Very much," he giggles. He never minded the more TMI side of his friends. He enjoyed learning about them and helping them.
"What about this sweater? Cute?"
"Hyung, you look adorable. Calm down. Bin is literally your best friend, and Jisung is so in love with you that he doesn't care what you wear."
"I-I know, but I'm so nervous. What if I call in sick? I can do that right? Because I'm feeling nauseous. I don't want to throw up on them. Yeah, I'll do that." Chan picks up his phone, ready to message the two until Felix grabs it out of his hand.
"You are going on that date. You are going to be fine. Take a few deep breaths. It'll be okay. They already love you and each other. It's just going out with them today," Felix reassures, patting his back.
"Yeah... yeah. Okay. I can do this." Chan nods, though the nauseating feeling in his stomach was still present.
Soon after, he left. They were meeting up at a cafe. It was going to be okay. Felix was right.
As Chan got closer to the cafe, he saw his dates through the big glass window. His heart rate sped up. His breath caught in his throat. The two looked like they were already having a good time, but you could tell they were waiting for him.
He took another step before he stopped. He was frozen. He couldn't do this. He couldn't.
In a split second, Jisung looked out of the window and made eye contact. Chan stared at him, feeling like a deer caught in headlights.
Then he ran.
He ran fast, pulling the dumbest move he could. He couldn't do this. He couldn't bare the idea of everything going wrong, but he was the one making everything fall. He ruined it before it could ruin him.
He sprinted into a nearby bookstore. Fucking hell, why did he run? Jisung saw him! What if he thinks Chan hated them? He backed out very last minute. He told Felix he was going!
His phone vibrated in his pocket. He shut it off. He went to the very back of the store and found a bench. Oh, god, what has he done? He just ditched his dates. He's so dumb. Oh, no.
He rests his elbows on his knees, putting his face into his hands. He couldn't believe he had just ran from them. What was he supposed to do now? They'd look for him at home. He couldn't say he got sick. Jisung fucking made eye contact with him!
As he sat there, he spiraled. He tried holding it together, he really did.
He's always been an anxious person. He saw a therapist about it. It rarely helped, but it was nice talking to someone.
He pulls out his phone, turning it on and immediately calling Felix.
"Hey, what's-"
"I ran."
"You what? Chan, oh my god. Where are you?"
"Jisung saw me. And I ran. I couldn't take it. I just couldn't breathe. They looked so nice. I got so scared. I didn't know what to do. My instincts hit me before I could think."
"Fuck, hyung. Okay, calm down. Where are you? Are you going home?"
"No, I thought they'd look for me there, so I went into a bookstore. I feel so sick, Lix. Oh, gosh. It's killing me. Why did I do that?"
"Chan, just take a moment and breathe. It's okay to be scared, but you can't run. You need to go back and talk to them. Go on your date. They not only deserve it, but you deserve them. I promise you it'll be okay."
"I can't, Lix. I physically can't."
"Hyung, please."
"I-... I'm sorry. I'm just gonna sit for awhile. Thanks for talking to me."
"Chan-"
He hangs up the phone, staring at the missed calls from Changbin and the texts from Jisung. He felt so stupid. He couldn't face them after this. He broke his own heart. What was wrong with him? He sighs, hiding himself again.
"Hyung."
Chan gasps, his head snapping up to meet Changbin's and Jisung's eyes. His heart pounded in his ears.
"Guys, I-I-"
"It's okay," Changbin smiles, sitting next to him. "We know. Felix told us. Are you okay?"
Chan nods. His ears were on fire. They caught him. He was so guilty, but he couldn't say that. He couldn't apologize. He couldn't do anything.
"For the record," Jisung smiles, grasping Chan's hand gently. He paid no attention to how it was trembling. "You look adorable. I like the choker. It's a nice touch."
Changbin's hand goes up to Chan's hair, running his fingers through it. "Do you want to go back to the cafe? I'm sure you haven't eaten yet. You never eat when you're nervous."
He knew that because he was Chan's best friend. He knew him so well that it made the eldest more upset. He regretted it so much.
"I'm so sorry," he whispers. "I don't know what came over me. I saw you two and just- I don't know. Panicked. I got so nervous."
"It's okay, Channie. We know it's a nerve wracking thing. It's not a big deal. We caught you before you could completely leave. What matters now is if you let us take care of you," Jisung kisses his cheek, nudging his cheek with his nose almost like a cat.
"Y-yeah. I'd like that."
"Good boy. Let's go eat."
•How was this?
😌 don't mind that subtle subby stuff•
