I hold my dog in my lap as I rapidly text Seungmin, upset by what I just discovered. A small sniffle escapes me, but I blink away the tears.
Hellhound
he lives on the other side
of the fucking country, yk?
and i haven't seen him in
like two fucking years
and we've tried so hard to
plan shit and it never
works out and the one
time i plan something
we both agree on, he
fucking tells me he
can't do it this weekend
because of a family
birthday thing.
like i'm trying to be
understanding, but we've
had this planned for weeks.
i understand things come
up, i know. but still.
i miss him so fucking much
and i just want to feel at
home somewhere and this
was our chance and
he cancelled.
i live two hours
away. two fucking hours!
we planned
the entire weekend. and he
pulls this shit. i'm trying
not to be upset with him
too much but it breaks
my fucking heart. it
makes me think that he
doesn't even want to see
me even though we're
practically brothers.
i just wanna cry so bad.
i love him so much and
this was our one weekend
for each other.
so yeah, i'm a little
fucking upset. i don't want
to be, but i am.
______
I set down my phone, closing my eyes and petting Bbama. Deep breaths enter and escape me. I just wanted to see my best friend. Chan and I have hung out once in six years. It's been so long. I miss him so much.
My phone dings, and I instantly pick it up. My heart sinks at what I read. My jaw clenches and I set my phone down again.
"Oh, my god."
______
Hellhound
Look. You got to understand
things happen. If he
has a birthday thing so
what. There's always and
I mean always later.
You can try the weekend
after or a few days later.
Sorry that sounded rude...
but you got to understand
things like that. If someone
chooses to do something
else then oh well shit
happens. That's how I
look at it.
______
"Don't. Oh, my fucking god. Do not pick up that phone, Jisung," I whisper to myself. My breathing gets deeper.
Bbama picks his head up, his collar twinkling at the sudden movement. I stare into his eyes. "Okay, I'm going to do it."
______
Hellhound
i'm going to leave for a
few. i do not want to
yell at you or say something
i'm going to regret. bye.
Ok. Stay safe
______
"What the absolute fuck," I growl. I swipe out of my messages, clicking on Felix's contact.
It rings twice before his face pops up on the screen. "Yo, what's up?"
"I'm so unbelievably pissed off right now. I'm literally shaking," I say, closing my eyes and pressing my fingertips to my temple.
"What happened??" He frowns, noticing my unstable expression.
"So this fucking bitch- okay, hold on. Okay. So basically, after weeks of planning to hang out, Chan cancelled on me. I was pretty upset and stuff, but then something else happened and now I'm just mad. But yes, I got upset with Chan and obviously needed to rant. I texted Seungmin and you know what he had to say? You have to understand where he's coming from and shit happens."
