ꨄThe Debutanteꨄ

96.

...

Next Morning

...

Cookie yawned while she walked down the hallway of the hotel, a rather annoyed look on her face. She followed behind Carol and Candace. "Why do we have to do this so damn early?" Cookie asked. "Because it's a vacation, duh. You have to make the most out of the day." Said Candace. Cookie released a groan.

...

Cookie released another yawn while she stared down at the nail technician shaping her fingernails with a black fingernail file. She put her other hand over her mouth. "Sorry.." She said, and the technician only nodded and smiled. Next to her were her sisters, also getting their nails done. "Y'all really got me out of the bed at 8am for this?" Cookie asked. "Oh stop being so sour- Yeah, we did this for you because we wanted to make you feel better about- Shh!" Candace expressed towards Carol, wrinkling her lip and squinting her eyes.

The nail technician shifted their eyes between them. Cookie looked confused. "Uh, hello, about what?" Cookie asked. "You know...your situation with..." Candace cleared her throat, and Cookie caught on to what she was referring to. She sighed. "Oh."

"Well there isn't really much of a situation with that anymore, is there?" Cookie said, then looking away. "There are only memories. I can live with that." She continued. Her sisters stared at her in disappointment. "Since when have you been the type to just...brush it under the rug?" Asked Carol. Cookie grimaced. "Listen- This is unlike you, Cookie- You two were meant for each other- Shhhh!" Carol started to chime in, and Cookie and Candace shushed her with strong emphasis.

"Shut up, Damn." Cookie snapped quietly. Carol rolled her eyes. "I just don't want to talk about it anymore. Alright? That's it." Cookie said. Candace stared at her for a few moments, not seeming to believe her for a second. "Alright." She finally spoke, then turning her head straight.

...

"Do you think I'm being too harsh, mom?" Cookie asked into the phone, sitting out on the balcony of her hotel room. She stared at the people walking by, the boiling hot heat making her scoot a little further underneath the table umbrella.

Renee was on the other end of the line, listening to her daughter question herself over and over again, seeking her opinion. She and her daughter haven't spoken in awhile, and she hasn't really seen Anika since she was in the hospital. However, she felt so much pain for her after knowing what she experienced after the breakup. How Cookie started to slip away again.

And now, it's been a year and Cookie was still questioning her decisions. First she was fine with the choice she made, then the next second she would be shaming herself for not trying harder to keep the relationship going. But how much harder could she have tried? It wasn't the same as a relationship that ends because of the partners falling out of love. This was done because their passionate love was in just as much passionate danger.

Renee understood why Cookie did it. After seeing fear in your lovers eyes constantly, you can't help but feel as if you are some sort of cause for it. Cookie almost lost her, and even when she was in a coma Cookie could hardly get herself out of the bed.

"You aren't being too anything, punkin'. You're just in a battle with your feelings." Renee said. "I just...I feel like I made a mistake. Then on the other end I feel like I saved her." Cookie said. "You're feeling a little regretful and you're feeling a little relieved. That's how love is sometimes. It's a constant back and forth battle between what's wrong and what's right. What'll do the most damage and what will help the most." Said Renee.

Cookie was silent for awhile. "I...saw her recently, and-" Her mother suddenly gasped. "Ooo, girl! Don't you tell me you got swept in again, you are bad!" She said. Cookie rubbed her forehead. "I shouldn't have done it. I should have walked away." She said. "I should have walked out the door and not look back...but just...when I saw her after all this time..." Cookie trailed off.