Chapter 89: I miss home

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Shay

"I love kissing you" Amari whispered into my ear, clutching the bedsheets to her chest. She slowly put her lips on mine stealing another kiss.

"I love you" I uttered looking deep into her eyes smiling softly. My hand caressed her cheek while she just stared at me.

"I love you babe" she responded kissing me again.

I guess she really loves kissing me.

Currently we're in London at her old apartment. We were living our best life. We traveled a lot, prayed together, went out, kissed a lot, had sex...a lot of stuff.

Amari and I were together for something like two months now and I can say that I enjoyed every single minute. I was more myself than ever. I was happier than ever. I had everything I've ever wished for. I simply enjoyed life at its fullest and Amari was a big part of it.

I can't describe the love I feel for her. It's something I can't put into words. She was an angel in every way. Amaris personality is a beautiful blend of compassion and strength. She's incredibly caring, always going out of her way to help others. Oh and her sense of humor is hilarious. She's the kind of woman who has this ability to make everyone laugh.

What makes Amari truly unique and special is her unwavering personality and resilience . No matter what challenges come her way, she faces them with a determined spirit. When I had the hardest time, her words of encouragement and her belief in my abilities gave me strength to push through.

Being with Amari has made me a better person. A better human being. Amari is the most inspiring person I know. She inspires me to be more patient with any kind of process, more giving and more appreciative of what I am now. The love I've been receiving from her changed me and I love being loved by that woman.

She asked me in the most romantic way possible to be her girlfriend. I remember that exact night when I came home from the gym and she set up a picnic outside. We were talking for hours and everything was perfect. Then she started searching for something in her bag and when she found it she handed me the book. First I was like "wow she finally finished the book" but when I looked at the cover it said "Shay, will you be my girlfriend?". Of course I said yes and started crying immediately. Oh and after I thought that my cry session was over, she told me that the book was about me and started reading. We were awake the whole night and I've never cried that much.

Anyways. That's how it was going.

"I'm going to make some breakfast now" she said kissing my lips the last time before she got up and put on her bathrobe leaving the bedroom.

I sighed and groaned as I took my phone and looked at the time. It was 8 am and I was so fucking tired. I don't even know why I woke up that early but it is what it is.

I took my phone looking through Instagram and my messages. I haven't been that active on Social Media. I kind of like the real life living. But I do post pictures sometimes. I wanted to post one for so long so I started searching in my gallery.

Instagram

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shaydavis ...<3

shayswomaan GUYS SHE IS THE PRETTIEST MF

amarii_ ♥️

courtneychipolone w o w

shayriana u really in a new relationship?

haileybieber aunty shay looking good as always🫦

brandonoffaya HOT CHICK

I laughed at the comments. This is actually the first post I did where I left the comments activated. I had my reasons why I had them deactivated for a long time.

Many people still ask me about this subjects even though I'm really trying to forget that chapter of my life. Ariana.

Have we talked to each other? Have we seen each other? Did she contact you? Did you contact her?

No. No. Yes. No.

She sent me drunk voice messages and said how she wanted me back and everything. How she's sorry. She even sent them over Courtneys Instagram. I didn't react to them. Nor did I react to her other ten million fake accounts. Or new phone numbers. I even changed mine to a new one so she couldn't contact me again. I know, we will see each other eventually. In two days the Grammys are getting announced and I'll be the host so...I guess she'll be there too. I wasn't afraid or something because I won't get any feelings back but I know that she will be sad and I don't like seeing anyone sad. I just want her to move on. I won't ever come back. I'm settled. I'm happy. I'm in love with Amari. More than I was in love with her. I can't and won't ever compare Amari to Ariana because Amari is my soulmate. She's my everything and she's the woman I want a future with.

"Breakfast is ready baby" Amari yelled making me jump a little bit since I was in my thoughts. I smiled and got up forgetting every bit I was thinking about. The only things which were important were that we were healthy and happy. And we were thank god.

I ran downstairs and saw the table set with different types of food. I smiled at my girlfriend coming closer to her.

"YOU are insane" I told her placing my hands around her neck staring into her beautiful eyes.

She chuckled and kissed me softly before gesturing me to take a seat.

-

It was evening and Amari and I were already in our pajamas and tugged in the bed. I was thinking a lot and I really missed my family and I missed working. I missed Jaiden and Vic and my niece of course. And I'm so into modeling again. I'm looking forward to do photoshoots and be with my colleagues.

"What you thinking about babe?" Amari asked smiling at me.

"I really miss LA and my family. And I really want to go work again. I saw Haileys photos from the shooting she had and I miss it like very much." I uttered honestly.

"Well I think you should do that then. Getting back to work will be great for you and seeing all your friends and family of course."

I smiled at her and kissed her lips.

We were currently in London. We couldn't stay on vacation forever and Amari had to get things done for the new movie she's directing.

"But I'm kind of afraid" I said and stared at her while she gave me those eyes.

"What are you afraid of babe?"

"We'll be far away from each other and I know you got a movie to direct."

"We will make it work baby don't be silly...we got this and I can still take 2-3 days off. And we will FaceTime all the time. It's gonna be fine." she assured.

"It's just we're always together for months. I haven't been without you not even a single day. I'm just-"

"-You afraid to go back. I understand that." she cut me off and finished. She knew exactly what I was thinking.

"Look hun, I understand that too good I feel that. But there's nothing to be afraid of, you'll be going back to your family and friends, your job and your life of course. Maybe there will be moments where you will feel like shit but remember that I'm with you all that time and I won't ever reject any call from you. And if you really don't feel good I will be on my immediately. I promise."

"What did I do to deserve you?" I stared into her eyes as she smiled at me.

I pulled her closer to me and placed my lips gently on hers while I put my hand on her waist.

"I love you" I said.

"I love you too"

...

hey guys how are you? what do u think of this book?

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