"Options... I've ran out of Options..." (Book 3)

Chapter 180 - "Leaky Boobs...?"

Chapter 180 - "Leaky Boobs...?"

Clara's PoV

'One Meal. One meal where I want you all to behave and be good' I snapped as I finished flattening Henrys hair down on the top of his head and looked at the girls in particular.

'Why do we have to go to a fancy restaurant though?'

'Because your Dad wants to meet this man and have a nice meal with him. It's not too much to ask and then you can do whatever you like for the rest of the holiday' I smiled still annoyed myself.

I was promised that this holiday was a rest. And with everything that had gone on recently I wanted it to be a break away from all the crap at home but he just couldn't do it.

He bumped into someone yesterday on the beach who he fixed up a business meeting with this morning and now the family's have been roped into dinner.

I wasn't in the mood for it if I was honest. I wasn't in a great place and what was even worse was I'm now 4 weeks post birth and getting hormonal ready for periods again.

So I wasn't great.

The only thing that was getting me through and wanting me to go to this meal was the giant chocolate brownie I had been promised.

'I'll be good but I want more Pokemon cards' Evie bargained.

'If you all behave then you can have a treat each of sins kind tomorrow. Now go and find your shoes'

Evie and Avia had dresses on with their sandals so they looked decent and Poppy was wearing a really nice top with a skirt, whilst Henry had my favourite outfit on him with his little suspenders and jeans and a polo top.

'Have you got everything?' I asked as John grabbed the car seat and baby bag to jump in the taxi that was waiting outside.

'What else could you possibly need other than milk and nappies?' He smirked encouraging me out of the door as well.

This was going to be a long evening.

- - -

'Marshal Walters. You must be John?' I huge bulking man asked shaking John's hand gruffly.

'I am indeed. This is my wife Clara and my kids' he said introducing us to one another and the man gave me a big bulking handshake.

'Nice to meet you all' he smiled motioning to the table where everyone took their places

I learnt after he introduced me to his wife that he has two daughters aged 13 so

- - -

'What is wrong with you?' John scoffed as he opened the bathroom door and I breathed in quietly with a few tear drops to my eyes and looked at Harry.

It was the baby changing toilets so it was acceptable for him to come in. The only reason I had bought Harry with me was because it was a good excuse to escape and have a few moments to myself.

I looked down at my shirt and realised that some milk had leaked through the vest top and my bra onto my shirt and that there was no hiding it.

My breasts were huge - bigger than they normally are because my bra was feeling seriously tight and I didn't even want to attempt taking it off because my nipple was practically stuck to it.

It would hurt to peel it but in an hour or so I would have to feed Harry.

'Clara what's wrong? You've completely botched up this dinner. The only reason I get away with it is because your less than 4 weeks post birt--' he said as I turned around and looked at him.

'And that's all you bloody care about is your reputation and not my welfare. Bloody men do not know anything do they? You just look pretty in suits whilst your wife is trying to feed a baby up to 8 times a day and struggling with the fact that they leek through everything she wears along with the fact that they hurt like Fuck and are most dedicatedly infected. I didn't even want to come tonight. I'm sorry but I didn't'

'Your in pain?'

'My boobs are Fucking leaking as shit and cracked to Fuck. It's obviously an infection and not a problem - I just could have done without all of this stress tonight that's all' I mumbled leaning on the sink and looking at myself in the mirror.

When had I become so old and ragged. I never ever became this much of a wreck with my other kids after they were born.

A week after Avia was born I was back out on the clubs in high heels and even two weeks after Poppy was born I might have gone run away but I was still a lot more held together than I am after Harry.

I guess I was a bit older this time - but 35 was not too old to be having a kid.

John looked at me and then I could see the guilt written all over his face and I knew he felt terrible.

I didn't want him to feel terrible I just wanted him to know that I was uncomfortable and quite frankly would like to go home.

'Here. Have my jacket. I didn't even realise' he hummed wrapping his jacket gently around me as not to touch anywhere that might hurt.

'I'm sorry I've ruined your meal?'

'I just wish you'd have told me you was in pain. I would have done something to help' he mumbled kissing the top of my forehead. 'I'll call the nurse in the morning and see if there's anything over the counter we can buy here or sort something out. You can't fly home in that much pain and you still have to feed Harry because we don't have nearly enough back up milk for that'

'Actually I think feeding Harry is a good thing. I think breast feeding isn't such a bad thing still and it will all clear up in a week or so. I'm just a mess especially with Gran going and this holiday is not helping'

'I'm sorry. I thought t would be like a having a break but if anything it's more stressful trying to keep up with the kids' he grumbled.

He had a point.