"Options... I've ran out of Options..." (Book 3)

Chapter 44 - "Panic Button..."

Chapter 44 - "Panic Button..."

Clara's PoV

'If you wasn't so busy worrying about yourself all the fricken time then we wouldn't be in this mess' Lilly scoffed at Richard.

'Your the one that was watching both boys on the bloody trampoline. This is your fault' Richard accused with a growl.

'But if you hadn't started up the same argument again' she said rolling her eyes.

'Because your the one that bought it up'

'All I pointed out was that I wanted another kid. I can't help my feelings' Lilly yelled at him as John was already at the other end of the phone yelling at Richard.

'It's alright Aunt Lilly. I found him' Avia said with Henry in her arms snivelling about wanting Daddy.

'I want Daddy' he cried as Richard took him in his arms.

'It's alright buddy. Come on. Let's go and see some firework's' Richard suggested.

'I want Daddy' he snivelled again as he cried in Richards arms.

Richard was doing his upmost best to comfort the poor 3 year old - before he had a major meltdown in the middle of the field. 'How about we go and get some chips?' Richard suggested to keep him happy - even though he wasn't happy.

- - -

'Are you Fucking kidding me? They lost him?' John growled as I was on the bed whilst he was on the phone to Richard.

'They've found him. Cheez calm down' I scoffed.

'Calm down? Are you joking. Get your father round there this instant. Someone has to look after them... properly' he snapped.

'Don't be so harsh. He's safe. They've found him. He'll be okay'

'He's crying for me' John scoffed.

'Because you baby him that's why. He's nearly three years old for gods sake. And you treat him like he's a baby. He'll be okay. Richard and Lilly have their own son and will look after them perfectly fine. Don't over panic'

'How can I not? He's my only little boy' John said deflated and sat on the bed.

'Why don't you FaceTime with him?' I suggested.

'Because that might make me miss him more and confuse the hell out of him' John mumbled collapsing on the bed very close to the brink of tears.

'I trust them with my life John... so I trust them with my kids'

'Well that's irrelevant because Henry isn't your kid is he?' John snapped standing up and slamming the door of the villa obviously gone out for a walk.

- - -

I stayed in the bedroom for most of the afternoon then. Evening there time was afternoon our time so I just stayed out of John's way and evidently he stayed out of mine.

I didn't want to anger him or get involved in the situation because he was right. He wasn't my son.

I had no claims on Henry whatsoever but he does have claims on Evie.

The first time I came out of our room was at 9 o clock when my food delivery had turned up and I had to walk down to the gate to get it.

'Where are you going?'

'Food delivery just arrived. Just going to the gate to get it' I hummed walking past him.

He stood up off the sofa and bolted out of the villa leaving me to sigh as I went to grab two plates assuming he would want to eat with me now.

It was just a good job that I had ordered enough for two people.

'I could have walked to the gate' I said as he placed it on the side then pushed his hand through his quiff.

He only does that when he's nervous.

Then I looked at the bags under his eyes and how puffy his cheeks were and realised that he had been crying which meant something totally different.

'Why didn't you come and get me?' I huffed coming round the island and taking his face in my hands and looked at him.

'I thought we were arguing?'

'I wouldn't call it arguing - you were just kind of rude' I said with a shrug. 'But you were right. Are you okay now?' I asked.

'Yeah' he said shrugging back. I hate it when he's alone and has a panic. I hate it when he's alone at all these days.

He looked so miserable. 'John he's safe. He's okay. I know he's your baby boy but it seems to be that you've got attachment issues. Or that he has attachment issues?' I hummed.

'I know he's safe. I know. And I do trust them. I know I said that I didn't but I do' he mumbled. 'It wasn't that, that triggered the panic. I can't always determine what if is or when. I didn't really want to have one on the honeymoon' he sighed as I started fishing through the bag for the food.

I was getting hungry.

'Do you maybe think that you should start going back to your therapist for a while? You were doing so well at kicking its ass - yet recently it has seemed to have got worse?'

'I know. I know I need to do something'

'Look I don't want to make you feel like I'm getting overly involved but I do think you should do something before we end up going round in a vicious circle and you do something stupid agai--'

'Your wasting your breath. I do know. I promise I have booked some more appointments. Can't we just have our honeymoon in peace?' He huffed looking completely exhausted.

'Yeah. Do you want some of my Chinese?'

'You ordered enough for two?' He asked confused.

'I knew you'd need feeding' I smirked.

- - -

'Listen? About the whole your not his Mum thing?'

'I was offended but it wasn't your fault' I mumbled. 'What you said was pretty much true' I huffed.

'Doesn't mean I had the right to say it - because I didn't. I'm sorry. And I've been thinking about how I adopted evie'

'Because you practically raised her alone' I pointed out.

'And you have raised Henry as well as me. He practically calls you Mummy. You are his Mum and I think you deserve the legal status' he mumbled as inwrapped my arms around his neck.

'We have to ask him if that's what he wants. He has to have the choice'

'He's three' John scoffed.

'I love you' I smirked kissing him.