Journey of Life.

Chapter 12.

"Dad you can talk to me." I comfort him.

"If I do, will you promise me something?" He asks. "From now on I want you to share every doubt you'll have in that beautiful little head of yours." He strokes my hair.

I don't reply, I just nod. Then let him tell me what he's going through. He hasn't had much success with his latest trial. In a sense, he did his best but it didn't work. Therefore he feels guilty towards the victim of the crime. It was a woman who suffered abuse from her husband and whom only wanted to break away from him, denouncing him. Obviously he does not admit to the judges of his acts, rather he used the excuse of marrying a madwoman.

As he continues explaining, I analyze his expressions. I notice what happens when one is stressed. His dark circles indicate numerous nights without sleep, he will probably have often had a headache. His eyes are tired and swollen, they seem to have cried. As they stare at me, I can glimpse in him a mirror in which I can reflect myself. Now I understand that I was not alone in being in that state. Who knows how many times, he pretended his mood in order not to create problems and stress at home. Unfortunately being with someone like mom didn't help him much.

Now I comprehend that the only one who's been selfish is me. I am so blinded by my problems, insecurities and fears, that I don't notice what is going on around me. Especially to the people I love. I feel guilty for not being a good daughter, and for not being supportive when he needed it. So it is natural for me to embrace him again, but this time tighter. Strangely I don't cry, I feel calm as if that is what I needed. I feel reloaded, and it occurs to me, that in the end no one is truly alone.

The truth is, we just have to open our eyes, and look around. It is not easy to say, but I am sure there is someone always there, present when you need it. Like I said, you just have to look around. And that's what I'm doing, and seeing an adult man, being in that state makes me so tender. Because it is normal to show our weaknesses, especially when we have bad days. It reminds me a lot of a quote, which I accidentally read on the internet:

'For the world you can be one person, but for one person you can be the world.'

We are all human beings with same feelings. The only thing that differentiates us is how we deal with them. Which is good, nobody can stand in our way. But on the other hand, our every action can have influence on another person. Which is sad, because when we are hurt and depressed, we create a trap and unconsciously we blame life. When in the reality, it's just that things happen for a reason. If you're down, maybe it's a sign to strengthen you. Think of how many times you have been happy after a long day of stress. It doesn't seem to help, but it's to make you understand that you have to remember how strong you are. You have overcome a thousand obstacles imaginable in life, and despite this, you always have the strength to go on. So whenever happens to feel lost again, remind yourself of your successes. Especially of who you are. You may not be satisfied with it, but it is important to always move on.

Don't forget that you are important to many people, and you will be important to those you meet over time. Life will be good with you if you only know how worthy you are. You cannot run away, you will have to understand it if you want to believe that anything is possible. Never give up, because it is true that we are a small cell on Earth seen from the universe. But what matters is how great you are with yourself, and in the things you will love. I trust you, and you have to trust life. And that's why I feel so positive after hugging my dad.

I immediately realized that for a person you can mean the world. Despite the bad times I had with my family, I can say that they didn't give up on me. They have always loved me, and accepted me as I am. Unfortunately when you grow up, you have to make mental movies, where everyone is against you. Which is absolutely acceptable, also because without this phase no one would have the chance to get to know oneself.

"I'm proud of you dad." I caress his shoulder. "I promise you that I will share with you all my doubts that I will have. Thanks for sharing and making me feel useful."

I hug him again. "I love you."

"Me too, honey, me too." He concludes stroking my hair.

"Don't forget to say sorry to that girl." He says getting up slowly. As he goes out he reminds me to smile often. "That's what makes you even more beautiful."