Journey of Life.

Chapter 100.

"I can't wait to see her again!" Nancy happily exclaims. "I also hope she gets better, so maybe I can invite her over home, and who knows maybe we can then become friends."

"So let's do this. After Nikki, we go to her too, what do you think?" I ask carefully walking down the stairs without tripping.

In addition, looking down, she explains "I thought I wouldn't have fun today but with you it's impossible. I will miss you when you have to leave us."

Touching her nose, I reassure her by saying "Remember I'll be in New Jersey, I won't be far away." Tickling her, I hint "And when I see you, the first thing I'll do is just this."

She laughs with so much joy. To immediately change expression, as James says "Come on Nancy, let's go home."

So the little girl kisses me on the cheek without a word. I smile as she, in order to get in the car, tries to climb, she's really lovely and small. Especially Daniel who has settled next to James, sleeping like he's already under his blankets. Who knows what James will have done with him to reduce him so tired. I think something certainly funny, knowing him well, when something comes that makes him happy, he ends up getting tired easily. Just like dancing, despite the fact that he likes it, he immediately tends to lose energy.

For that matter, I'll try to talk to Thomas somehow. Obviously if I can't convince him, I can only hope that they can understand that it is important for children to follow what they love to do. By experiencing and trying, they can understand their way without then falling into confusion. In particular, in pushing little Nancy to go to school. I think a friend like Josephine will help her a lot to settle in.

Well, I've already planned other new goals.

So once I say hi to her, I get nervous as I see James positioning himself in front of me. I have a feeling that something has changed, or is it just my impression? It usually came naturally to me to look at him. Instead now, all I do is watch people go in and out from the hospital, trying to carefully code what they say. But it is impossible for me, his perfume invites me in the world where he made that daisy bloom in me. Making those immense colors shine, with numerous and different emotions. And more and more with each step he takes towards my figure.

The moment he wants to open mouth, my phone rings. By answering I understand that it is my mother, informing me that she is at home, reassuring me not to worry about shopping. Once I confirm my return, I hang up, slowly raising my eyes. After thinking well, I ask if he has any plans in the evening, immediately regretting asking. It is obvious that he is busy with his schedule, so without showing that I am disappointed...of course, I expected him to be, let's say available. It would have been nice if...

ENOUGH!

Forcing a smile, I just greet him walking quickly even if I have the feeling that he is following my movements, who knows how he will be gazing at me. I think as usual, cold and intensely. In fact, after Daniel calls him twice, he goes back to being himself. I figure out this when he starts the engine. Despite that, I'm telling myself not to turn around. I don't want to end up like in the previous chapters, which is to feel bad and constantly having to miss his presence. But as I find myself in front of my car, I feel I want to go back to those days, in which despite being distant and absent, at least I had the courage to stare at him and smile correctly- because I knew that for everything, I would have loved him equally.

So what has changed?

Yet when I see him in his car again, laughing and talking to his siblings, I wonder if I'm the one who's changing. It is useless to hammer myself with doubts, it is not worth it. The thing that saves me from this situation is precisely the arrival of the semester, I can't wait for that moment to come. I desperately need to change areas and meet new people, possibly in the company of my friend Nikki. I'm already imagining, the two of us sharing the same dormitory and who knows maybe working in a small restaurant- and then at the weekend joining various parties...like finally living the college life. Just thinking about it gives me goose bumps, so thanks to this thought, my smile returns.