𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐂𝐥𝐮𝐛 ✦ 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐟𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝

𝘐 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨

[ Y/n ]
— Aged up: 17 —

I sat in the living room of Boris's house, getting high as I always did. Boris always let me get high in exchange for my love and attention.

I know he really liked me. I knew he really cared for me.

Don't get me wrong... I love him and I care for him but I really just wanted to feel something.

And getting high is the only way I've ever felt like I wanted to.

I took another hit from my joint while Boris pressed kisses on my neck. He trailed the kisses up to my jawline, peppering them lightly over my skin.

"Give me kiss." He demanded, resting his head on my shoulder. "No." I replied, putting the joint back between my lips.

"Come on." He said, sitting in my lap. "Just one." I glared at him and blew smoke in his face. He rolled his eyes and went to grab the joint.

"Give it back!"
"No! Kiss me first!" He teased.
"I'm not playing Boris! Give it back!"
"Kiss me принцесса!"
"NO! GIVE IT BACK!"
He put the joint out on the couch and leaned in to kiss me. I pushed him off me and he landed on the floor.

"GOD! YOU'RE SO ANNOYING AND PATHETIC! I'M JUST HERE TO GET FUCKING HIGH AND YOU'RE RELYING ON ME TO GIVE YOU THE LOVE YOUR DAD NEVER GAVE YOU! HE DIDN'T EVER GIVE YOU LOVE BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T DESERVE IT YOU USELESS PIECE OF SHIT! THE WORLD WOULD BE SO MUCH BETTER WITHOUT YOU BORIS!"

I covered my mouth and watched as tears built up in his eyes. "Boris, baby, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened, I'm not in the right mindset-"

"So our entire three years... You never love me?" I shook my head and crouched down next to him. "No! Boris no that's not it! I do love you! I was just being an asshole, I'm sorry. I'm on my period, I didn't mean it."

Boris stood up and as I went to stand up he held his hand up. "Just leave. I will give you stuff tomorrow. You don't have to pretend anymore." I shook my head and grabbed his legs.

"Boris I'm sorry! Please don't do this! Please don't leave me, I'm begging you! I love you so much, we're going to get married, remember?"

Boris pulled my hands off of his legs and stepped away. "Go." I shook my head and stood up. "No! I'll prove it Boris! I'll get clean for you, I swear I'm not dating you just for the drugs!"

"YOU JUST SAID THAT YOU ONLY HERE TO GET HIGH! NOW YOU ARE TRYING TO CHANGE TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE YOU LOVE ME!"

"I DO LOVE YOU!"

"THAT IS THE FIRST TIME YOU'VE SAID IT! DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I SAY IT EVERYDAY AND YOU ONLY SAY IT NOW!"

"BECAUSE I'M SCARED BORIS!"

"I AM TOO! I'M SO SCARED! THAT DOES NOT MEAN I PUSH YOU AWAY!"

"Boris..."

"No, go."

I felt the lump in my throat as he stared at the floor. I grabbed my phone and ran out his front door. I ran down the street until I tripped and fell.

I landed on the concrete hard. I groaned in pain and continued to cry. "Fuck..." I whimpered. I threw my head back, slamming it against the ground.

I can't do anything right ever. I can't even run away from my problems correctly.

I should just lay here until I fucking die.

Then maybe I'll finally feel like a person again.

I took a deep breath and started slamming my head on the ground. I did it as hard as I could until finally, nothing.

When I woke up, I was in a familiar room. "Она милая, а? Вы позаботитесь о ней, если она проснется, верно? Не дай ей уйти. У меня не было женщины, чтобы трогать меня с твоей матери." (She's nice, huh? You'll take care of her if she wakes up, right? Don't let her leave. I haven't had a woman touch me since your mother.)

I closed my eyes again and pretended to still be asleep. "Да, я позабочусь о ней ... Ты можешь пойти вздремнуть." (Yeah, I'll take care of her... You can go take a nap.) It was Boris. I wanted to cry, he would keep me safe. I hope.

"Ладно, не будь громким, или я выйду и побью твою задницу." (Okay, don't be loud or I'll come out here and beat your ass.) The gruff voice spoke. Boris replied with a quiet 'Да' and there was loud walking. I heard a door close and sat up.

Boris was at the counter, with his back facing me. "Boris..." he turned around and ran over to me. "Oh my god, did he hurt you?! Did he do this?!" I shook my head and said that I fell pretty hard.

"What happened? How did I get here?" I asked. "My dad saw you in the road and picked you up. He brought you here- you have to go. You have to leave or he'll rape you. You have to go Y/n."

I shook my head and placed my hand on his cheek. "Boris your dad will beat the shit out of you. I'll do this to make up for what I said." Boris shook his head.

"No. You make it up by going on a date with me. We figure details out later. You leave now. Right now." I shook my head and felt my tears coming back.

"Boris he's going to hurt you!" I whispered. Boris pulled me in for a hug, kissing the side of my head. "He would've beat me no matter what... Now go! He will get in car to look for you. You need to be home before he wakes up."

I got up and Boris handed me a jacket. He leaned close to my ear as we were at the door. "Has knife in right pocket... If my dad gets you... Or anyone else... Use it. Careful grabbing it, no cover on blade."

I nodded and turned around. "Boris, please be careful. Come to my house after if you can. Okay? Text me if you need me to come over. Don't feel bad. Just do it. I want to help you little prince." He nodded and I kissed his head.

"Thank you Boris." He nodded and started to close the door. "Wait." He opened it and looked at me. I leaned in and pressed my lips against his, holding his head against mine.

We pulled away and I rubbed his cheek lightly. "I love you Boris Pavlikovsky."

He laughed and grabbed my hand. "I love you Y/n L/n. Safe walk." I thanked him and walked down the driveway, starting my way home.